Do you think most couples who get married in their twenties last?

[Whydoesmybackhurt]

I've phrased it clumsily, sorry. Do you think couples who meet and marry in their twenties generally are seen to be more successful marriages?

I can't imagine marrying that young, I'm nothing like the person I was in my early twenties. Broke off an engagement and shudder at the fact I nearly married a massive twat. But that's on me clearly, like I say I was really immature

I'm fascinated by people who marry young and successfully grow together with their spouse, just can't imagine that experience at all! I do think it's seen as the 'right' timeline to aspire to in general.

I haven't read the whole thread (so apologies) but I'd imagine it entirely depends if you grow together or grow apart (assuming no other issues).

I've never been married, but I was with my ex from age 19 - 32. That was too young to have a 'life partner' I think and who I was at 19 was massively different to who I am now. My ex and I were together but had very different life experiences and we had nothing in common by the end.

Me and all my friends married in our early 20's. Every single one of the husbands cheated. I think a few years in they realised they hadn't sewn their oats. Only one couple are still together (she knows he had a long affair and forgave). The rest of us remarried in our 30's or 40's and in every single case the 2nd marriage is stronger - I think perhaps because by the time we married for a 2nd time, we had slept with a lot more people.

• sown

We were married at 23. Now been married for 43 years. It is great to be able to share memories of jobs, houses, holidays, bringing up the kids, running a business together for 30 years. I guess we have been lucky in some ways, but am so grateful we married when we did. We have some great memories, and everything we have now, we have achieved together.

I married at 21 and still together so far (11 years) so hopefully they do

Met when I was 15 (well, one day short of my 16th) Started dating when I was 19. Married at 22. We've been married 19 years this year.

i only know of two divorces of my friends - both were in their 30s when they got married and both divorced within 3 years. My friends who got married in their 20s are all still together (mid 30s now)

No, I don’t agree.
Those around me who married in their twenties are now bored, fed up of their partners and ready to jump ship now the kids are older. Those who married later seem to be still enjoying each other’s company.

I have noticed a pattern though: almost every couple I know who were each other’s firsts, wouldn’t hear of separating.

Been with DH since 18. Together 33 years, married 30. Very happy.

It can work......

ReallySpicyCurry he was in t h e Army, she (15), met him when she played guest cello with his orchestra, he (39), is very old fashioned, and didn't realise her age, it was term time, and t h ey got to know each other through their joint love of music. When we found out they were meeting I went bonkers, accused him of everything and a bit more.
Anyway after talking to social services, police, school, and GP we just let them see each other under supervision expecting their relationship to die off . But it didn't.
6 months later, she became ill, lost use of legs, and gross motor skills, she was in a n d out of hospital, he really supported her. To cut a long story short docs couldn't give us the reassurance that s he would live to 18. They wanted to marry, so who were we to deny her this? So we signed the paperwork for her to marry.
All these years later, her health has deteriorated, but she's done her A levels, then a degree with OU, she has skied, been to big concerts, car racing, and does some voluntary work, she needs carers 24/7 but manages a home and lives independently. They are very happy together.
They do cause raised eyebrows because of the age gap, but to be honest she never was a child, she's never been a makeup and flashy clothes girl, and though obviously he is MUCH older than her, they compliment each other, like 2 peas in a pod. Lots of comments when they first married, she tried going to a 6th form college, the other students were split half thought she must belong to a traveller community, the other half were convinced that she had had an arrangement marriage.

My husband had been married before for 9 years when I met him
I was 26 and he was 32 recently divorced
We got married 3 months later and have been together 21 years this summer
I think one thing that is good for us is that although we have children of our own we decided not to have any together which I think was definitely the right thing to do for us
Our kids are all grown up now so it’s just us and the dogs 😂 which is nice

Wow Sally, that is a crazy story! I'm really glad it's all worked out for your daughter, it sounds like she's a very strong young woman.

Me and DH met online when we were 15. Got together age 16, had our first child at 17, second at 19, married at 20, third child by 21. We then had an unexpected surprise of child number 4 when we were 27.
We have been together for 13 years, married for 9 years this year and have 4 children.

Everyone told us we married too early and had children too young. That we should have waited.

I've now been diagnosed with a rare disease, which the medication that I need to take means I will be infertile. It also gives me a short life expectancy.

Are we happy? Yes. Do we regret any of it? No. We've made the most of our time together, we've had children and we've been happy doing so. If we had waited to get married or waited to have children, we may have only had the one child, or even no children at all.

Met at 17, married at 20. Married 23 years this year. It's bliss.

Met my dh at 19, engaged at 21 married at 23, dc1 at 24, dc2 at 28, still very happily married at 31.
However we both lost parents young and having a family important to us both; we see it as if we have time later in life to travel see the world that will be a bonus.
My DM met my dad at 16, married at 19 died at 30years old leaving two young kids behind. Depends how you see it.
I never expected to settle down when I did but I wouldn’t change a thing.