Do you think most couples who get married in their twenties last?

[Whydoesmybackhurt]

I've phrased it clumsily, sorry. Do you think couples who meet and marry in their twenties generally are seen to be more successful marriages?

I can't imagine marrying that young, I'm nothing like the person I was in my early twenties. Broke off an engagement and shudder at the fact I nearly married a massive twat. But that's on me clearly, like I say I was really immature

I'm fascinated by people who marry young and successfully grow together with their spouse, just can't imagine that experience at all! I do think it's seen as the 'right' timeline to aspire to in general.

Engaged at 20, married 22 and had first child at 23. Married 14 years and all good

I met my OH at 18 and at 33 we are still very much in love. There have been ups and downs as in all relationships but generally speaking we have similar interests, enjoy spending time together, have two beautiful daughters who we parent in similar ways and I honestly can't imagine being with anyone else. I don't want to be cheesy but he is for sure the right person for me. I think it's bout meeting the right person, not the age you meet.

Obviously you need some fundamental compatibility and chemistry/attraction at any age. But I do think it's easier in 20s. Both are more 'innocent' then, you mature and grow up together (and get stronger sharing ups and downs). You committed earlier in your own life journey. Not impossible in 30/40s just harder and more gamey, the whole dating scene. Also more variety of emotional baggage and pre meditated expectations from past dates or relationships.

Met DH when we were 22 got married at 29 now 40 - tbh I can see us just becoming friends occasionally shagging but generally we’re ok

I was married at 20, been married for 19 years in May. I guess it depends on the couple.

@SquigglePigs definitely agree started dating my husband when I was 16 and we knew within a few months we'd get married although didn't get married until 6 years later. My mum however messaged me to say she'd met someone in the July, were engaged by the September and married 2 months after that ‐ they've now been together 7 years. I don't think there's a formula as such but it is definitely about how people work together in the good and the bad

I got married at 24 still together 27 years later and very happy.

Got married at 25 and it’s our 10-year wedding anniversary this year. Where we lagged though was in having kids: we only have 1 son so far and he’s only 2! This was out of choice though: no fertility issues or anything. So many factors at play...

@Angel2702

I know just as many people who married older who didn’t last, I think it’s about each couple rather than age.

We got married age 20 and 21.

This is similar to us married at 19 and 20 before going to university and still together 15 years later.

Apparently, arranged marriages are much less likely to end in divorce and the couple are more likely to report themselves as being happy. I can only imagine this is because many people have poor judgement when young.

@GodOfPhwoar It may be that divorce rates are lower for arranged marriages for the reason that they harder to get out for a range of reasons? Or that there is a different level of acceptance / tolerance etc?

Dunno I met mine when I was 17. Married him when I was 23. I am massively different now but we got old and boring together 😂

The most gorgeous couple I know married at 19 and have just celebrated 30 years.

I married at 22 and have remained married for 28 years.

My parents were 23 & 25 which was considered quite old at the time. My mother's parents actually built an annex on their house for her because they though she would never leave home. They're still together after more than 50 years.

I look at young people of 22 now and excuse then all sorts because they're young and then remember that I was married with a mortgage at that age.

I think, possibly, if you marry very young marriage is something more significant to you. We married because living together would have been wrong for us and we've certainly had rough patches where we might have separated if we hadn't been determined not to. Some people will think that's a bad thing.

I hope so....
Got together when I was 16 and he was 18,
married when I was 23 and he was 25, now 38 & 40 and still going strong

@GodOfPhwoar

Apparently, arranged marriages are much less likely to end in divorce and the couple are more likely to report themselves as being happy. I can only imagine this is because many people have poor judgement when young.

That may be true, but most of my Sikh colleagues whose parents found them partners described it more like a matchmaking service where you’d be presented with potential partners but it would be up to you to find one you got on with.

Obviously some people would find this stifling, but it certainly lowers the possibility of ending up with a cocklodger or somebody who has been dishonest about their past.

Doh, was replying to the below quote:

GodOfPhwoar It may be that divorce rates are lower for arranged marriages for the reason that they harder to get out for a range of reasons? Or that there is a different level of acceptance / tolerance etc?

I met dh when he was 19 and I was 16, moved in together when I was 20, got married at 26 and had ds when I was 28. We've been together 15 years in April. Sure we were very different when we met but we've kind of grown up together and for us that's worked, we are a very strong couple. I have friends in similar positions.

Conversely I know couples who met early 20s, married a few years later and divorced relatively quickly.

I think it's just down to luck really.

I met my husband at high school!! We got engaged at 17 and married at 21. Still together 28 yrs later with 4 kids and 1 adopted kid. Both still have a laugh, I still get flowers most weeks. So yeah we lasted.

Not married but I've been with my partner since I was 22 (he was 26) and I'm nearly 39. I'm pregnant and we're planning on a civil partnership.

Statistically you are more likely to break up if you marry young or old. From about 25-35 is ideal but obviously it depends on the couple. I got married at 21 and DH was 23. Ten years later and we are going very strong. There will always be exceptions.

Most couples i know know who met and amarried in thier 20s are still together. There is a big difference from 20 to 29 though but all the ones who married 24/25 are still together

I’ve been with my DH since 16, still going 16 years later!

You can be incompatible at any age. Dh is a year older than me. We were 20/21 when we met. 22/23 bought a flat together. Engaged just after our 26/27 birthdays. Married at 27/28. 10th anniversary coming up but it will be 17 years together.
He's my best friend, we make each other laugh and we enjoy our life together. I can't see any of those things changing now.

We met at uni and married when we were 23 (now 46). Lots of our uni friends also married the partner they had at uni, in their early to mid 20s and all are still married.

That said, my son is now 16 and if he asked what I thought of him marrying at the age we did, I'd have reservations as it was quite young. Clearly I'm a hypocrite!

@summerstorm I agree, so many people are in love with the idea of the wedding day itself which is just one day in the whole of their lives. I've seen so many people exhaust themselves and get into enormous debt just to have one lovely day - I simply can't understand this desire. By all means spend enough to have a nice day with close friends and family, but so many people spend a fortune they simply can't afford.
I find it also surprising that many people are together for many years, have children THEN decide to marry and break up not long afterwards - why?
I don't know the statistics on the success of marriages at various ages, but it would be interesting to see them.