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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Getting on the bus for one stop?

163 replies

Givemeabreak88 · 14/01/2021 09:36

My children are at school atm because they have autism and a ehcp so they are allowed a school place. The school is just over a mile and we walk there, it can take a bit longer due the my daughter especially as she struggles with the walk and can be very slow, refuse to walk, that kind of thing. This morning we were running abit late and the journey takes about 25 mins walking. Anyway part way through the journey there is a bus we can get, it’s only one stop but it’s quite a long stop and it’s from the top of a steep hill to the bottom. If you are in London you will know it’s been raining heavily today so as we were walking we were obviously all getting soaked, so I checked my phone and saw there was a bus due in 2 minutes and we were right by the bus stop. So I decided we would wait under the shelter and get the bus. We got onto the bus and the driver quite rudely said “You get on the bus every day to go one stop!” And started laughing, I do not get on it everyday, this was the second morning we had got on it! And they have only been back a week so I thought that was an odd comment because before going back we hadn’t got on it at all. Now he wasn’t doing it as a joke it was really rude and I felt embarrassed, like I was being called lazy? now I can tell when someone is being friendly and joking before anyone says that, he absolutely wasn’t it was said in an aggressive tone. I was quite taken back and commented on the fact it was raining heavily but he shook just his head. I ended up getting off.

Aibu to get the bus one stop? My daughter is very slow to walk and that one stop is a 10/15 minute walk with her. I didn’t realise getting on the bus for one stop was a problem which as I said I wouldn’t normally do anyway it was only because of the rain.

OP posts:
Coseynightin · 14/01/2021 09:38

I think the Bus Driver was just commenting in a light hearted way and see no issue with it tbh

Givemeabreak88 · 14/01/2021 09:40

Oh like I said it wasn’t light hearted, knew someone would say that.. His tone was aggressive and he was shaking his head hardly light hearted.

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2021ComeAtMe · 14/01/2021 09:46

YANBU at all! Whatever makes life easier at the minute I say Smile

If he caught me on a bad morning I'd be quick to remind him that people using the bus for any amount of stops are what keeps him in a job.

The bus service is terrible where I live now due to people not using public transport. Buses have been taken off and drivers have lost jobs.

Givemeabreak88 · 14/01/2021 09:49

I just felt it was more of a judgemental thing and unless you was there you wouldn’t be able to tell his tone was more passive aggressive than friendly, I don’t think drivers need to be commenting on how far someone is going, I am paying Confused and I’ve only got on it twice since they’ve only been back a week so hardly every day!

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Averyyounggrandmaofsix · 14/01/2021 09:55

I think you were over sensitive, I certainly would not have got off the bus!

TechGinny · 14/01/2021 09:55

YANBU at all. Obviously the bus driver doesn't know the reason for you only travelling one stop but, regardless of that, it's his bloody job to stop to let people on and off when they need it! He has no right to question, comment or otherwise.

campion · 14/01/2021 09:59

Next time remind him that you're the reason he has a job. And don't get off the bus!

Costacoffeeplease · 14/01/2021 10:01

I think you’re over thinking this. What does it matter?

RandomMess · 14/01/2021 10:06

I wonder if it's because he is feeling vulnerable regarding Covid and can't understand why people want to increase their exposure risk by using public transport?

Bloody rude of him!

Givemeabreak88 · 14/01/2021 10:06

Yeh it doesn’t matter so why did he comment! Confused even without my daughter it’s common sense that someone waiting at a bus stop to go one stop in heavy rain is doing it because of the rain.

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BarbaraofSeville · 14/01/2021 10:10

Would he prefer that no-one used the bus and he didn't have a job?

If you're lucky enough to be in a position that the bus is coming in 2 minutes and it saves a walk up a steep hill with slow walking children, most people would get the bus in those circumstances.

LemonBreeland · 14/01/2021 10:12

Why on earth did you get off the bus. I would have told him that it's none of his business how long you are on the bus for.

fabulousathome · 14/01/2021 10:15

Just a bit rude of him. How does he know if any one of you is disabled or not just by looking?

It's similar to the cashier in a supermarket commenting on your shopping choices.

Slightly rude but he's probably just trying to make conversation.

Babdoc · 14/01/2021 10:19

OP, your duty of care is to your DC and yourself, not to the aggressive and illogical feelings of an idiot of a bus driver.
I am stunned that you made your poor autistic child walk a mile in the rain to humour that wanker!
I would have stayed on the bus and reported him to the bus company management for his appalling attitude to paying customers. And you should ditch your meekness and start standing up for yourself and your DC - you deserve better than this.

WorraLiberty · 14/01/2021 10:20

He won't have been the first rude person you've come across in life and he certainly won't be the last.

Therefore I can't believe you made your kids get off the bus and start walking again in heavy rain we've had all morning.

notacooldad · 14/01/2021 10:23

So what if he judged you. It doesn't make any difference to your day.
I bloody would not have got off the bus and just shrugged had he said that to me. Its none of his business why you need one stop or the last one.

Givemeabreak88 · 14/01/2021 10:25

Now I’m neglectful for making my kids walk in the rain? Wtf 🙄 this sites nuts.

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Givemeabreak88 · 14/01/2021 10:27

We wouldn’t have got the bus if it wasn’t coming within 2 mins, we would have walked, we only got it because it was coming a couple of minutes, didn’t realise walking in the rain was neglectful Hmm

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WorraLiberty · 14/01/2021 10:28

No-one's saying you're neglectful.

You got on the bus for your kid's sake and then got off the bus for what? To appease a random driver?

All people are saying is your duty of care stops at your DC and yourself, not Mr arsey pants.

Givemeabreak88 · 14/01/2021 10:30

Well if we are made to feel unwelcome then yes I will get off. He obviously had a problem with it.

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WorraLiberty · 14/01/2021 10:33

Ok well if his thoughts are that important to you, I'm not sure what you want anyone here to say?

We're all different and personally hell would freeze over before I let the thoughts/opinions of a random interfere with my travel plans or anything else really.

NewYearNewLockdown · 14/01/2021 10:33

Well he was very rude and I wouldn't have got off the bus.
He doesn't know your circumstances or how long you've walked before getting on the bus.
Don't let him stop you tomorrow OP, if you want to get the bus, get the bloody bus.

3JsMa · 14/01/2021 10:34

He was out of order.
It's none of his business and he is not paying your fare.Next time tell him he will be entitled to comment only if he will pay for your ticket.

teenagetantrums · 14/01/2021 10:36

When l lived in London and had a weekly travel card l would often get on bus for one or two stops if there was one coming. Especially with kids who travel free anyway.

Givemeabreak88 · 14/01/2021 10:37

I won’t be getting on it again that’s for sure! Didn’t realise I was getting judged for it. Normally I walk home but again due to rain I wouldn’t, I would have got the bus because on the way home it takes me closer to my house (it goes round a different way on the way there) so it’s about 4 stops home but tbh didn’t want to end up getting on his bus again.

OP posts: