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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Do you think Im being selfish?

204 replies

Zenab12 · 09/01/2021 13:10

Hi so, I'm in a pretty bad place at the moment and I would just like to know if people think I'm being selfish or over reacting?
I've always suffered with mental health problems( aniexty and depression) but it was triggered quite badly after I became a mum I think. I just suffer quite badly with a low mood.
I'm married with 2 kids (5 and 3) my husband is Pakistani and I'm British. A year ago my brother in law announced he was coming over from Pakistan to go to university here ( which my husband has payed for his entire education up until now as he is the oldest son and my sister in law doesn't give anything to my mil and fil) it's only my husband and his sister here, who is married with 3 kids ( there is cousins etc but they are very jealous and don't speak to both brothers) it was decided he would work part time with my husband when he came in between uni as my husband owns his own business,there for he would live with us. So last January he came, I tried my best to welcome him, we gave him the spare. Room and made him a bedroom, my husband never specially asked me to do anything for him I just tried to look after him because. He had no one else here and I wanted him to settle in and adjust ( he's 24 now BTW) it was fine at first he would clean his own bedroom etc, take his dishes out etc. After a few months. Though he starred making me do everything for him, he stopped. Cleaning his bedroom and doing his washing, he would let me bring his food to. Him on the table and let me take his dirty plate away when he ran upstairs to his bedroom leaving all his dirty plates. On the table. He kept going into my bedroom without asking, I caught him going through my husbands draw for socks and me and my husband share a draw for underwear so he was essentially going through my underwear, I was so embarrassed as I am a Muslim woman. He starred leaving his dirty socks in my dining room for me to pick up, just put a full washing basket of dirty clothes I front of me telling me to do it all there and then. I spoke to my husband about this as I. Didn't think it was fair I was the only one doing anything, I also. Didn't appreciate. The fact that he was working and never offered a penny towards rent, bills or the food shop considering food is flying out. Of the house at the moment because he doesn't stop eating and snacking, we've never asked him for money but he hasn't even offered. Let alone contribute in other. Ways. My husband has spoke to him 3 times and he won't listen, he just keeps saying he's too comfortable now. He gets me to make all 3 of his meals every day, I'm not just talking about cereal for breakfast either, a full cooked breakfast is expected every morning and I end up not eating properly because I'm tired after making 4 other breakfasts. My husband leaves him in the house alone with. Me when he doesn't want to work and I've. Said. To. Him so many times that I'm so uncomftable being left alone with him as I feel like so much. Of my privacy has already been stripped away from me by him just being here, I feel like he's taking over the house. It's got. To the point now my husband is just siding with him and telling me to put up with it and deal with it. This morning I didn't. Make him breakfast and instead. Of getting rhe hint that I didn't want to do it for him he went upstairs to bed and waited for me to cook his breakfast and call him down. I just don't get what is so wrong with telling someone to do their own things, hes not a child he's. 24 and I'm fed up of being a slave, fed up now of sharing my house. Me and my husbands relationship is suffering because I don't feel comfortable being intimate with my husband because his brother is in the next room and keeps his door wide open at night,its like he's almost doing it. On purpose to come between us. I'm. Not allowed. To say anything because I'll be classed as a trouble maker. In the. Family because of their. Culture, but my husband. Is to scared. To say anything too and just. Keeps saying what can ido tell him to leave. I've told him unless he talks to his brother and sorts him out. Then I want him to tell his brother to go and live with. His sister,do you think Im being selfish? I'm just so exhausted I have my own 2.small kids and husband to look after and I just don't like it anymore.

OP posts:
LouiseTrees · 10/01/2021 10:05

@Zenab12

I know, because I'm already suffering mentally it's just making me so much worse. When I think back to it I was doing okay until he came here. I've tried compromising and just trying to get on with it and deal with it but mentally and physically it's affecting me. I've tried talking to my husband but i think he's just fed up of me complaining now and shouts at me and baxicslly tells me to deal with it. I think its starting to get to the point where I just want to get out of the house now when he's here, which is sad I feel like I have to get away from my own home, I know if it keeps going like this it's probably going to get to the point where I ask my husband to choose between us, which it isn't what I want to do at all just don't see what other option there is, he hasn't listened the 3 times he's already been spoke to and I have a husband who doesn't want to say anything to him, just don't see what options are left other than to just get on with it and do what he wants 😔
Speak to the brother but tell your husband in advance that you don’t really mean what you are going to say. Tell the brother that he has been successful in pushing you out but that the house is going to be sold so that you and your children can purchase a new house so he’ll need to go elsewhere. Obviously in the meantime it’s very shameful for your husband but he’s the older one so clearly the brother will need to take on the widely duties role. Have your husband sleep on the sofa a few nights. See if the brother believes it.
LouiseTrees · 10/01/2021 10:14

@Zenab12

I spoke to my husband last night about it again, I sat down and had a proper talk with him. My husband said he actually spoke with his mum about the whole situation yesterday ( the first time ever) I was prepared for him to tell me to stop being selfish but he actually told me his mum has told his brother many, many times to stop being lazy and to help out in the house, not just that but his sister has too. I think it hurt me more knowing he's been told but he's ignored it. I didn't know up until today that the mum and the sister had been telling him for ages to help and to do his own things, I felt I couldn't even go and talk to them because I would be judged but it seems to not be the case here. I'm happy that they agree with me but now it's not a cultural thing, I have realised it is just pure selfishness going on here. My husband has told him 3 times before, my mother in law said she's told him alot of times and even the sister, so he is clearly just ignoring everyone. I'm slo angry about it. I told my husband last night that he has to start doing his own washing, bedroom clean, breakfast and take his dishes from the table once he's finished and wash the other things otherwise he has to be told to leave. My husband has said he thinks that is fair and has told me to tell my brother in law myself as its better coming from me and he might listen, I asked my husband to be their when I do it because I am shy and can't make conversations easily. I feel like something is finally being sorted but I have a feeling he isn't going to change. I've told my husband I don't want it to get to the point where we have to ask him to leave after all I have sacrificed my own happiness for so long to try and make this work, if he really wants to stay here now he has to listen otherwise he has to go and I realise it now truly.
Thank goodness
LagunaBubbles · 10/01/2021 10:14

My husband has started shouting at me everyrime I talk about it and told me to stop being selfish and to do things for other people, like he's started taking his side.

You are being abused by 2 different men. Culture is no excuse for abuse!

LouiseTrees · 10/01/2021 10:17

Phone the mother with him. Put her on speaker. Let her berate him while you and your husband listen. Sounds like they are on your side.

Lavanderrose · 10/01/2021 10:28

You’ve been given some great advice in this thread, now it’s time to put it into action. You will not be able to change this mans behaviour so you need to grow a backbone and start saying “no” and laying down boundaries do that you start enjoying life again. If the boundaries you put in place are not respected then pack your bags and get out of their with your children.

Quartz2208 · 10/01/2021 10:33

This is so sad OP - your husband is as much of a problem in that he doesnt respect you

It isnt going to be better coming from you - it should come from your husband. Please try and find your voice and tell those things to your husband and that he should be supporting you

Lavanderrose · 10/01/2021 10:34

And of course he feels completely comfortable living with your family (why would he want to leave?) he’s provided for, waited on hand and foot, doesn’t need to lift a finger or spend his money. He obviously has no respect for you both. But your husband and you have allowed this behaviour to get worse by not putting boundaries and rules in place. Instead for complaining to your husband you need to be direct “I will no longer be doing his washing or cooking breakfast” etr.

Seatime · 10/01/2021 10:39

You are not being selfish, you are being used and abused. Please get some support. The Muslim Women's Network in the UK has a helpline 0800 999 5786. Also their email is [email protected]
Women's Aid can advise also. You don't deserve to be abused. Flowers

WilsonMilson · 10/01/2021 11:02

I understand the cultural differences makes this more difficult, but I think if you don’t take a stand now, your entire life will be like this.

I would stop doing anything at all for him, and if his attitude doesn’t change I’d pack his bags and tell him to gtf out of my house. Your DH sounds spineless and won’t help here.

CharlotteCollinsneeLucas · 10/01/2021 11:37

Please stop taking his behaviour so personally. He is the same with everyone, after all. You have been really nice to him, but as you say, he's thrown it back in your face. So it is time for a change.

Actions speak louder than words. I find them easier than words, too! So, with the washing (assuming this was bil not DH?) I would've felt angry and humiliated, like I think you did, but I would've moved the bag from the kitchen back to his room. Actually, it's time to start refusing to do it, like you and your DH have agreed. Mention that in the talk you're having, so then if he brings you washing, you can just put it back in his room. No need for uncomfortable conversations, then.

To make this talk you're going to have easier (and I do think your DH is passing the buck getting you to say it), write down the expectations and check with DH that he agrees. Then the talk just needs to be: DH and I have talked and this is what we expect of you if you want to keep living here. One sentence, very clear.

But you have to be strong. Don't think, "well, I don't really mind, I've done it before." This is your new start for 2021 and it'll be a great year for your dignity and self-respect.

I think you'd feel happier if you stop picking up dirty socks from the floor, too. Anything that feels demeaning - stop doing it. If your DC do it, go get them, take them to that room and ask them to put them in the bin. (With small DC, if you think they won't, it helps to say, "and then we'll (go to the playground/watch your favourite programme/insert thing they like doing here.)") With DH, either leave the socks there, or move them to somewhere more convenient for you - a box on his side of the need, maybe. Only wash things which are put in the correct place.

The great thing about all this is that nothing needs to be said. Occasional reminders, maybe, no more than that. You decide what level of respect you deserve and you stick to it.

RoomOfRequirement · 10/01/2021 11:38

It's not 'culture' it's misogyny and I really hope neither of your children are girls because you're all teaching them that treating them this way is ok because they're women. Stop defending their behaviour as their culture and start calling them out for the horrific sexism they have or leave.

CharlotteCollinsneeLucas · 10/01/2021 11:39

His side of the bed that should be

MissMarpleDarling · 10/01/2021 11:46

Being a female Muslim does not make you a slave to every male family member OP why do you think it does?

MissMarpleDarling · 10/01/2021 11:50

You've just got a lazy BIL and an unsupporting husband it's nothing to do with being Muslim.

Meowchickameowmeow · 10/01/2021 12:00

My god OP, you're 24, you should be living a carefree life not picking up dirty socks and being used as a domestic servant.

Somethingkindaoooo · 10/01/2021 12:41

( at one point my husband blamed me for leaving my under wear in my own draw saying I should put it somewhere else)

Good grief.

Op
Why not talk to your mother in law,and tell her that her son is wearing you down.

Every one of your updates makes me sad. Your B iL is a jerk, and sadly your DH doesn't seem much better.

He let you suffer for months, and only JUST told you that his mum and sister have had the same frustrations with your BiL?

The thing is, your frustration is building. If you keep pushing it down then one day, you will pop. Or you will very slowly start resenting your DH.
Either way, it is a recipe for unhappiness.

Whatever dynamic you and your husband have with regard to chores etc is up to you guys. It seems to me that unless there is mutual respect, mutual agreement- so a real partnership, then one or more of you will be unhappy.

Zenab12 · 10/01/2021 12:48

@RoomOfRequirement

It's not 'culture' it's misogyny and I really hope neither of your children are girls because you're all teaching them that treating them this way is ok because they're women. Stop defending their behaviour as their culture and start calling them out for the horrific sexism they have or leave.
My eldest child is a little girl, she's 5.o have a son who is 3 and a half but I've taught them both they have to clean up there messes. I treat them both equally as I don't want them growing up with this mentality or same way of thinking.
OP posts:
Zenab12 · 10/01/2021 12:49

@Somethingkindaoooo

( at one point my husband blamed me for leaving my under wear in my own draw saying I should put it somewhere else)

Good grief.

Op
Why not talk to your mother in law,and tell her that her son is wearing you down.

Every one of your updates makes me sad. Your B iL is a jerk, and sadly your DH doesn't seem much better.

He let you suffer for months, and only JUST told you that his mum and sister have had the same frustrations with your BiL?

The thing is, your frustration is building. If you keep pushing it down then one day, you will pop. Or you will very slowly start resenting your DH.
Either way, it is a recipe for unhappiness.

Whatever dynamic you and your husband have with regard to chores etc is up to you guys. It seems to me that unless there is mutual respect, mutual agreement- so a real partnership, then one or more of you will be unhappy.

That's what I feel like, every time I see something that winds me up I get closer to snapping and shouting. I think I'm very close to breaking point with him
OP posts:
Zenab12 · 10/01/2021 13:15

@Meowchickameowmeow

My god OP, you're 24, you should be living a carefree life not picking up dirty socks and being used as a domestic servant.
I know, that's my point. I'm 24 and suffering with severe back pain as well because of how much work I do around the house. I know their is lots of women who go to work and do the house work and look after children but I never sit down these days and my body has just become so weak and I have such severe back pain, and it's not normal I feel like im 10 years older than I am. I've been to the doctor ( for another reason) a few months back and she asked me about my aniexty and my mood etc, I didn't tell her the whole story I just told her I felt low and I worry alot, she spoke to me about medication etc, I took the prescription but I didn't take any of it because I really want to get through this without it ( not that their is anything wrong with medication at all) at the start of this year I was feeling so much more positive, told myself I'd just cope with what was going on and my other problems and then lockdown got announced again and I just went right back down.

I've been trying to find out the causes of my aniexties and low mood and I realise alot of it is that I'm not happy just being like a maid for the brother, it is a huge part of why I feel so low and worthless. I'm also going through stages of asking myself who I am, I believe fully in my religion and always will but I've been having thoughts as well about taking my hijab off too, I don't know whether it's due to my low mood or if its something I genuinely want so I keep going back and forth on the decisions, I feel like im just trying to find myself and who I really am after years of being something everybody else wants me to be.

I really want this year to be a change for me, no matter what I know i need to remember I am not Pakistani, I need to be true to myself and what I know and stand up for that, I do know in my heart that I'm not selfish and I know also their is nothing wrong with what I'm asking for. I just fear people's acceptance and judgement so much because I feel so lonely and isolated I think that's why I do what everybody wants and let everyone walk all over me but I know that has to change now, and it will. Thank you for all the advice

OP posts:
Somethingkindaoooo · 10/01/2021 13:22

Op
Do you do anything nice for yourself?
Hobbies?
Study?

If not, please start.
It sounds like your life is wildly unbalanced in favour of you serving others and ignoring yourself.

I think I know what the answer will be.

Please can you start doing things to enrich your own life?
Self care isn't selfish, and it is a wonderful example for your daughter.
🙂

YippeeKayakOtherBuckets · 10/01/2021 13:41

So your husband is much older than you (how much older?) and you’ve been with him since you were a teenager.

You’ve been groomed and abused. This is nothing to do with religion or culture, this is absolutely misogyny from a man who wanted a willing slave. And now he’s installed his brother to further abuse you.

Zenab12 · 10/01/2021 13:48

@YippeeKayakOtherBuckets

So your husband is much older than you (how much older?) and you’ve been with him since you were a teenager.

You’ve been groomed and abused. This is nothing to do with religion or culture, this is absolutely misogyny from a man who wanted a willing slave. And now he’s installed his brother to further abuse you.

He's only 28 on the 21st of Jan lol
OP posts:
Zenab12 · 10/01/2021 13:50

@Somethingkindaoooo

Op Do you do anything nice for yourself? Hobbies? Study?

If not, please start.
It sounds like your life is wildly unbalanced in favour of you serving others and ignoring yourself.

I think I know what the answer will be.

Please can you start doing things to enrich your own life?
Self care isn't selfish, and it is a wonderful example for your daughter.
🙂

I don't do much for myself no, not really any hobbies or anything. I've tried getting into reading but I can't focus on it, I don't know whether it's something to do with my anxiety or low mood.

I'm hopefully fingers crossed planning to go back to college when my youngest starts full time school in September, I think it will do me the world of good and make a difference for me.

I don't even find much time to brush my hair anymore etc, I've kind of let myself go a bit but I'm trying to get back to how I used to be.

OP posts:
Somethingkindaoooo · 10/01/2021 13:58

Good, I'm.glad to hear you have plans.
In the meantime, please carve out some time to do something for yourself, EVERY DAY!!!

readingismycardio · 10/01/2021 14:00

I do understand there might be cultural implications, but just freaking say no & repeat. If your husband wants to, he can cook breakfast every single day