AIBU please be honest I can take it and need to know.

[2021isnotgoingwell]

I need to know if I am being unreasonable with my DP.
( I have 3DC )
My daughter fell ill and had suspected meningitis was my sister I looking after the other 2.
DD was rushed in, and I called DP who was at work at the time.
I explained what had happened and I was clearly very upset.
Anyway he told me he was going to get some sleep after shift this was about 11pm
He did not contact me until 5pm today to ask if DD was ok and very casually asked over text.
I haven’t had any sleep in 36 hours.
Anyway he then after he could tell I was upset said that I am his piority but that his sibling has covid and he rang last night in bad way ( sibling is happily married ) that he was assessed by 111 and paramedic and was well enough to stay home ( 28 no health needs and they said he breathing was v stable ) . So I was focusing on him last night. I then decided to catch up on some sleep during the day as had a day off work and woke up at 5pm when I messaged to check on you.

He says it’s hurtful and wrong that I have told him that I need to act like he cares.
That I am ( our family ) his priority.

Am I really so in the wrong ?

No, he's an idiot

YANBU. How long have you been together?

Forgot to add I hope your DD is okay

Assume your dc are not his? He clearly does not share your priorities.

Is this his daughter that’s he’s unconcerned about? If so he’s not exactly winning Dad of the year, and even if not I would rethink his position as your ‘D’ P as he obviously is not putting you anyway near first!

Is DD his child? If so, he's a monster. If not he's an arsehole.

Is she his daughter?

Is your DD his DD too?

triple X

We have a child together and a family unit.

So you were at the hospital? He was at home and your other DC were at your sisters? That sounds bizarre that he didn't call you earlier. I assume not his DC? Otherwise that's even more odd.

Are they his kids? Particularly shocking if they are. But if not, you’re clearly a very casual relationship to him and you can’t rely on him for support. Hope your DD is ok.

He's not your DP

He's a bloke you used to date...

Do you live together?

No biologically not but a child who has asked to adopt and says he loves as his own he is now upset because I told
Him that’s not how you would treat our DD also I’m hurt that it didn’t his mind that I may have needed support.

I take it he isn't your DCs father? If not, how long have you been together?

I couldn't be with someone who thought very little of my children that they didn't seem bothered about their health.

You and your children are not his priority

I will clarify we have a child and live together.

You have a child together or you don't? It's not clear. He sounds just like a casual boyfriend who doesn't live with you

We live together be have a child. He was at work when she fell ill so my sister collected the kids as due to covid they couldn’t come.

Did he contact your sister to collect his kid?

It's absolutely disgraceful behaviour and I'm not sure I'd be able to forgive him. Whether his bio child or not!!

To be clear the child that's ill isn't his child?

Bizarre. Either way I don't think YABU at all and I wouldn't be letting someone adopt my child that has to be told to check on her when she's ill or that I wasn't married to!

Why would you do that?

Was it his biological child that was taken ill? Regardless of that though his behaviour would mean the end for me! Hope your daughter is on the mend now 💖