To ask what you think of SAHMs?

[HarryHarryHarry]

For the past 3 years I have been a SAHM. I never imagined that I would be one but I actually quite like it. Eventually I plan to go back to work but it could be that I just work unskilled-type jobs instead of having a proper career. I really don’t know what my options will be when the time comes. I might just stay home and focus on my writing, which is my real passion, or I might go back to university and retrain in something. (We are lucky that we can currently afford to get by on just one parent’s wages). Recently though I have been wondering what my children will think of me when they’re older. Especially my daughter. Am I a bad example to her?

If your mum was a SAHM, did you have any thoughts about that?

Good for him??

I'll be honest I could not be a stay at home parent..I love my job!! Hats off to you!

I am glad I am not one as I have no desire to be financially dependent on anyone else but I have no opinion on people who are.

Poor ponies
Two carousels now.

[quote SusannaSpider]@Cleverpolly3
The carousel is still going . The poor ponies must be knackered.

The debate might be crap, but I'm stealing that phrase.[/quote]
Isn’t it just.

Feel free 😉

Mine worked as did my dad but I would have given anything for mine to be stay at home, most friends had stay at home mothers and I was so envious. If I ever have a chance to do this for mine I will in a heartbeat, even if it’s only on a part time basis!

@GeordieGreigsButtButtZoom

it's no more necessary to have a job than not.

Money is essential. Someone's got to be bringing it in somehow.

Of course but if there's enough that you don't need to, why bother when you have better things to do with our life. Just because you don't work doesn't mean you have a poor work ethic, or are boring. You don't have to be a martyr living life like a hamster on a treadmill, some people want more time and freedom to choose what they do.

some people want more time and freedom to choose what they do .so long as their husband pays that is

@catty1720
I send my DH off to work every day he delivers shopping and has been hit,spat on and abused all through this

Really?! Jesus, people can be vile, sending unmumsnetty hugs his way, I'm certainly grateful he and others like him are doing their jobs.

@HeelsHandbagPerfumeCoffee that’s not very fair. Some women save before they have children so they can support alongside their partners. Plus some SAHM are that because they have no choice.

@SusannaSpider thank you that’s very kind I know it’s nothing compared to our nhs workers I can’t imagine what working in a pandemic must be like but it’s still a worry and it’s still tough just in a different way.

Not fair,or don’t want to hear it? This thread has posters who are quite clear they won’t and don’t work and have fulfilling hobbies.
Oh and husbands with a salary, so that they don’t have to

It’s not a job, it’s in no way comparable to a job

It was for me, but one I chose and would do again.
I was my dd PA and manager from when she was 8, so yep, a job.
This is why generalisations are shit and unrepresentative of all the population.
I wasn't on my own, every child wet had a sahp, quite a few dads. all H.ed too.
So, to some people it is a full time job as it would be hard if not impossible to hold down a job, as well.

we met not wet unfortunate mistake

Sahm isn’t a job. You can embellish and describe tasks, but doesn’t make it a job

@HeelsHandbagPerfumeCoffee it’s your opinion I’m not a SAHM so I have no problem with what you think but to assume every SAHM is the same is wrong yes I’m sure some do love off their husbands wage but I’m sure others have contributed in some way. I take it you’d never be a SAHM 🤣

@HeelsHandbagPerfumeCoffee

some people want more time and freedom to choose what they do .so long as their husband pays that is

Aw, he's happy to have me around the place rather than at work, always has. We get on ever so well and like each others company. He likes that we could accompany him when he had work abroad. Or the festivals that were quite often when kids were at school, dd would have missed out on so many opportunities had she attended school at the time.

Peruse my posts,see what you think @Catty1720

Individual choice....sahm ....whatever suits them really

@HeelsHandbagPerfumeCoffee

Sahm isn’t a job. You can embellish and describe tasks, but doesn’t make it a job

Yep, you keep telling yourself this. Is there some reason it should be, anyway? I mean why are you so desperate to keep saying this?

Is there a reason you’re so keen to impress upon me it is a job?

@HeelsHandbagPerfumeCoffee so what would happen if your DD grew up and decided to be a SAHM? I think as much as you get the stereotype of working career mum can’t love her kids much you also stereotype SAHM.

Sahm isn’t a job. You can embellish and describe tasks, but doesn’t make it a job
Depends on your definition of job.

I'm not particularly, moreover to point out that making generalisations and unfounded statements is ridiculous.

Some sahp aren't doing a job, others are.
You don't have to be lining somebody else's pockets to have a job or to work.
life isn't just work, childcare, paying bills, and endless drudge.
If looking after your family is your life's work then it's a job. (It's not mine, btw) not life, anyway

I can’t impose upon an adult,frankly they have capacity and free will - up to them
I’m not going to drive round,stage an intervention kidnap dd take her to a gulag until she relents