School refusing to allow DC to attend!

[LaraCroftFridgeRaider]

How I can take this further?

During the last lockdown, DD’s school were very strict on only allowing DC to attend where BOTH parents were key workers (or a single parent key worker).

DH is a keyworker but I am a SAHM so DD stayed at home. I also have a teenage DS with ASD and a learning disability who I am the registered carer of. His behaviour during the last lockdown was pretty difficult to manage at times and I feel it had a bad impact on DD. I don’t want her to be at home 24/7 with no respite from DS’s outbursts this time which is I want her to go to school. The whole family has already had COVID so I’m not worried about that. DS’s special college has completely shut down again.

I saw today that the guidance has changed to only parent needing to be a keyworker so I contacted the school to inform that DD needed a place but they are insisting that they will only be admitting DC who were eligible to attend during the last lockdown and the one parent change is only guidance!

AIBU to think they have to allow DD to attend?

If things are bad could u pay a childminder to have dd a couple.of times a week to give her a break?

@Spikeyball

I notice the 'concern' for vulnerable children is disappearing again now people have finished with using them.

Indeed.

They seem to be quite useful for co-opting to support your point of view, but then quite inconvenient when it's suggested that their support needs are important.

@CloseSchoolsProtecttheNHS

Please stop suggesting that she's eligible for a young carer place. It's really insulting to young carers. Just because someone lives in a house with a disabled person does not make them a young carer.

Hahaha you clearly don't actually know what you're talking about.

Well DS’s special provision have said that according to their guidelines they will be teaching online for the forseeable so it looks like they will remain closed. According to the guidelines on the gov website for special settings. they should be aiming to keep students in full time .

Your DD is vulnerable and should be entitled to a place. My 5 year old DD (with SEN) is attending school as a vulnerable child and both DH and I are at home as he has been furloughed and I am a SAHP. Any decision of the school should be based on your child’s needs alone. In your position I would contact the school again and focus on the fact that your DD is vulnerable as a result of her home circumstances. She has a right to an education (and to feel safe) which will be very difficult to provide at home with your son who you have described as being prone to outbursts.

You really have my utmost sympathy, I grew up with an older brother with severe autism and it did impact me deeply in every respect, much as I love him and would do anything for him. I can’t imagine how my mum would have coped both with him as well as having to homeschool me in this scenario.

@CloseSchoolsProtecttheNHS

I had no idea two of my children were classed as young carers . Honestly never occurred to me . I guess they would be entitled to a place at school now too. Will see what the school says tomorrow.

Well done everyone with your bullshit. Let's let the virus run riot because people think this twisted, catch-all view of a young carer is an appropriate reason to send children who were at home last time and have an unemployed parent to school in a pandemic.

Ask a real young carer how they feel about being lumped in with 'people who live in the same house as a disabled person'.

Oh, be quiet.

"The Young Carers service supports young people aged between 5 and 18 who are helping to look after someone at home."

How many 5yos do you think are actually providing care to their disabled siblings? How many do you think are identified as young carers because their lives are impacted by living with disabled siblings?

"and have an unemployed parent to school in a pandemic."

Unemployed, UNEMPLOYED!!!

What an idiot.

My DD has never done any caring for DS2, luckily she is older so can now look after herself. But the impact is horrific and no matter how much effort we put in when both her parents are home it will never make up for what she has lost. She is emotionally and physically scarred, she is scared in her own home to the point she spends most of her time in her room when DP is at work. When school and respite work she gets some normality but lockdown is horrific. I am not an unemployed parent or a SAHP, I am a full time carer.

My husband and I are both critical workers and can’t get a place!

We would love one of us to be a SAHP.

Would you also love one of you to be the registered carer of a teenage boy with autism and a learning disability?

I don’t want to make any assumptions about the OP’s situation but it seems reasonable to assume that maybe, just maybe, she’s a SAHP not because she likes watching daytime TV and painting her nails but because she’s a carer for her disabled son.

and have an unemployed parent to school in a pandemic.

But she isn’t unemployed. She’s a registered carer for her disabled son, who can’t go to his setting. She can’t educate her daughter. That’s the point.

It fills me with dread for the future of the workforce if this is the quality of thought and comprehension we have from people whose education wasn’t interrupted for months on end.

According to the guidelines on the gov website for special settings. they should be aiming to keep students in full time

Again, guidance. They don’t have to be open; they are providing an alternative. And like everyone else has said, your DD is not entitled to a place for the same reason.

For now OP look into a family member or childminder and if by this time next week the school still has no places then try and get her into a different school which have spare spaces.

I think this week is extra busy because it was so last minute but it will calm down a bit and I know at my school some parents have booked holiday leave from work so their DCs won’t be in for the next 2 weeks allowing spaces for someone else’s.

@CloseSchoolsProtecttheNHS actually in my case we both work so there goes your theory . I’ve been in contact with school and my older two children can infact attend school under the young carer thing. Thanks so much for advice on this thread.