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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

Original poster

AIBU.. to report my own parents (coronavirus)

263 replies

Tier4ParentProblem · 04/01/2021 11:28

Sorry, NC as outing..

They are in a tier 4 area.

I live abroad in a country which has struggled hugely with coronavirus and has put a ban on Brits entering there. I’ve avoided the virus so far with extreme diligence as I work a zero hour contract with no sick pay..

They turned up unannounced on my doorstep.

Whilst I’m pleased to see them, I’m furious that after all our care and sacrifice, they’ll have brought not only the virus but the “British variant” and then when it’s reported in the press it will be patently obvious to the neighbours who is responsible. Also, whilst being not an at risk group, we’ve been really careful to minimize our risk precisely so this nightmare can end sooner and we can visit them safely, in the uk. I’m cross with their arrogance. They won’t even isolate in my home either, they miss shopping and eating out...

So... WIBU to report them?

OP posts:
MichelleScarn · 04/01/2021 12:12

@Butchyrestingface

If there is a ban on entrants from Britain it really must be a country with bloody porous borders that hasn't noticed a plane or other form of transport arriving

Nah, they came in stealth-like, traversing the mountains, like the Von Trapps.

Agree, they must have climbed every mountain, forded every stream, and followed every rainbow to get around everything! And it's worked! Grin
SpaceOp · 04/01/2021 12:12

I don't know about reporting, but I wouldn't have let them in. Truly. And I'm not just saying this as we had a similar discussion re DH' family recently and I had to be very clear with DH about what I was and wasn't willing to do. Not least because we have to stay living here and the last thing I want is to piss of my various shielding neighbours who haven't seen their families in person for 9 months so for us to blatantly have family from far away turn up would be a slap in the face and WE have to live with these people indefinitely.

Notimeforaname · 04/01/2021 12:12

Report yourself to your neighbours. Tell then your parents showed up but you've allowed them to stay in the village and have contact with you.

Moondust001 · 04/01/2021 12:12

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

LilMidge01 · 04/01/2021 12:14

OP, I'm not certina on amounts but pretty sure the punishment isn't a 'stern word form an officer', but it is a fine of at least a couple of hundred £ which gets steeper for a second offence. Maybe check the consequences online first before you make your decision.

I get your frustration though. One negative PCR test on one particular day does nto mean you are not carrying covid (some commenters don't seem to realise this) and what they have done is hugely selfish, disrespectful, and entitled. It is because of people doing things like this that they think are 'harmless' that add up cumulatively and have put us all in this mess. I would tell them how ashamed I am of them (tbh I think that's a worse punishment to hear that from your own child)

Original poster
Tier4ParentProblem · 04/01/2021 12:14

To the many PP

Of course I let them in! I told them I was uncomfortable. They said "don't be silly."

I'm pleased international travel is looked favourably upon, I had the impression from mumsnet that foreign holidays were a bit of a no-no

OP posts:
Notimeforaname · 04/01/2021 12:14

by all rules and they think I'm being a silly little girl. I'd like it if they were told of the importance of the rules by a figure whose opinion they hold in higher regard!

But you are being silly!!!! To say you will report and have a police man visit them...yet you have opened your door to them and allowed them to stay in the village. 🤣

Cadent · 04/01/2021 12:14

@Moondust001 then report to MNHQ. Troll hunting is neither big or clever.

Skipsurvey · 04/01/2021 12:14

what a predicament

nicky7654 · 04/01/2021 12:14

The would have had to of been Covid negative to leave the UK. You are being silly!!!!

LividLovely · 04/01/2021 12:14

I would be fucking livid with them for so many reasons.

Not sure if I’d actually report them but I’d contemplate it. People are such twats thinking they’re special.

LEELULUMPKIN · 04/01/2021 12:15

Certain countries are imprisoning people, yes! Isle of Man, Barbados.

BigBadVoodooHat · 04/01/2021 12:15

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn as it quotes a deleted post.

Original poster
Tier4ParentProblem · 04/01/2021 12:15

@MichelleScarn that film was referenced when they were explaining their route Grin

OP posts:
Notimeforaname · 04/01/2021 12:15

Of course I let them in! I told them I was uncomfortable. They said "don't be silly."

No.op. extremely unreasonable. And laughable. How will you tell your neighbours you allowed the virus to stay in the village??the shame..

FatCatThinCat · 04/01/2021 12:16

@Moondust001

You are living abroad in a country that can be driven to, which has struggled enormously with Covid, and you have all your shops and bars open so your parents will be able to pick up Covid and bring it back? This story gets wilder by the moment.
You can drive to the country I live in and it has struggled enormously with covid, and all the shops and bars are open. Brits are also banned but that doesn't stop the exchange of ways to get into the country on expat forums.
NikkyD · 04/01/2021 12:16

Gosh you sound like a delight. You’re being ridiculous!

lucywho123 · 04/01/2021 12:16

Jeez. Its not ideal but just get a test in a few days and stop being so bloody pathetic. How nice your parents made the effort to come and see you btw - I wish I could see mine right now

Reporting your own parents. MN is a joke these days

CuteBear · 04/01/2021 12:16

If your country has banned Brits from entering, then how did your parents enter?

Also wtf has happened to the world? Why are people snitching on their own parents and children? Maybe research how Hitler gained control of Nazi Germany, especially the Hitler Youth.

notalwaysalondoner · 04/01/2021 12:17

I understand your anger but I think reporting them is wayyyy too far. They’re there now, it will ruin your relationship and is frankly Stalinist. Statistically the chances of them having it after a negative test are tiny. Take a deep breath and try and keep a sense of proportion. These people love you and made a mistake. I’d never report my parents.

Original poster
Tier4ParentProblem · 04/01/2021 12:17

@Moondust001 it's all true. But as I said, if it's that unbelievable then it's obviously a very weird thing for them to do. Report me to mn pleaseif you think ima troll I'll do the same for you for troll hunting

OP posts:
Notimeforaname · 04/01/2021 12:17

This is ridiculous Grin

Hoppinggreen · 04/01/2021 12:18

While I agree they should not be there OP I think you need to deal with them
They obviously treat you like a child so how about actually standing up to them for once and telling them to leave in no uncertain terms rather than get the police involved?

feesh · 04/01/2021 12:18

They won’t get into any trouble at all. The U.K. doesn’t care. I live in a tourist destination which is absolutely rammed full of Brits, plus British expats are travelling back and forth with zero consequences.

LilMidge01 · 04/01/2021 12:19

@nicky7654

The would have had to of been Covid negative to leave the UK. You are being silly!!!!
A negative test result on a particular day does not mean you might not be carrying covid!!!! I don't know how many times this information can be made public without people still thinking they can somehow get a piece of paper and be cleared for everything!!!

Testing at borders is still important as it will catch some positive test results. That is the purpose. It doesn't mean that everyone who gets negative is truly 'negative' and doesn't have to still isolate to allow for incubation periods. never mind the fact that they could have literally picked up Covid at the border control point thereby still testing negative a minute later but be icnubating the virus. Please people, the science is actually really quite basic