I was the only one not invited aibu?

[breadandwines]

I started a new job in July in a call centre.
I quickly made friends with my team.
In august I started seeing a man off our team and was invited on meals out (few and far between with covid ) but we had outdoor meet ups in between.
We all speak on a group chat on WhatsApp.
One of the group doesn't like me(it's obvious ) and I think she doesn't like the fact I'm part of the group.
Nye the girl wrote to one of the members "sleep well,excited for tomorrow "
I didn't think much of it and thought maybe they were meeting for a coffee or something.
Anyway last night they had a house party (which I wouldn't have went to anyway due to covid restrictions"
They didn't invite me and the guy I'm seeing is there and didn't invite me.
He hasn't spoke all day yesterday or today
Aibu to feel pissed off ?

It's going to be really hard but these people are not good enough for YOU.

You feel excluded by them, and that's natural. But they have behaved in a petty unkind way and your ''boyfriend'' happily went along with that.

They are not good enough for you.

xxx

Ugh, block the lot of them. He can get in the bin as well.

Please end this.

He's an arsehole. Out of the entire group he's the one that should have invited you.

Either he suggested inviting you and the group (or leader) said no. Or he didnt want to invite you.

Either way you deserve better. In the bin.

breadandwines:
said "thanks for the invite "
He replied "why would you be invited,we have all been mates for years"
.......
That says it all. Callous.
Ditch!

Your workmates, including your boyfriend, are a bunch of selfish idiots. Holding any kind of party at the moment is supremely stupid. Disassociate yourself from the lot of them and make your New Year resolution to find a new job. Stay away from forming close personal friendships with colleagues until you know them really well.

@breadandwines

I replied "well I'm surprised you didn't invite me" He responded "are you going on one,I won't chat to you till you chill out" I haven't replied He's just turned it around and I'm in the wrong.

Well that was daft!

Everyone was telling you to be super chill and just politely ghost him... Of COURSE he was going to take any pulling him up on it like a fucking 14 year old and start slagging you off. Probably now on one of their silly secret little Whatsapp groups huffing and puffing about you.

Just don't reply ever. And really, look for another job. They all sound absolute bellends.

I feel a bit embarrassed for you. Becayse I think you’re just going to let it go to keep him happy and also your text. It wasn’t his place to invite you. And as said, you don’t need to go to everything he does. So I’m not sure after all the advice you’ve been given on here you’ve taken the route you have.

@breadandwines

I replied "well I'm surprised you didn't invite me" He responded "are you going on one,I won't chat to you till you chill out" I haven't replied He's just turned it around and I'm in the wrong.

What a cock. You have to bin him off. For the sheer idiocy of going to the party, not mentioning it to you and his awful replies. I’d respond - I am chilled, but certainly won’t be chatting to you any further. Good luck with the hangover and 2021, see ya.

Think l would end it OPand say to him we are on different pages. Twat. The others aren't much better.

@breadandwines

I replied "well I'm surprised you didn't invite me" He responded "are you going on one,I won't chat to you till you chill out" I haven't replied He's just turned it around and I'm in the wrong.

Don’t respond to him, he sounds really manipulative. Doesn’t sound like a catch , l say dump him.

Don’t respond to him at all now. He has disrespected you by dismissing your question, dont let him treat you like this. If he’s like this after a few months, then things will only get worse.

FFS some of the 'advice' on here is so passive aggressive and just feeds into their nonsense, ergo adding to the drama.

Just be straight with him. None of this pussyfooting about with silly messages. Tell him you're done and that's that, no further discussion is needed now he knows you're pissed off anyway.

You know where you stand with the rest of them too - they're all duplicitous arseholes, but more importantly than that they clearly think that potentially spreading CoVID is OK. That says all you need to know about them. Just keep it professional with them while you make a decision of whether you wish to stay or look for another job.

'No worries, I'm chilled and we don't need to chat anymore. Take care!'

Can't believe you replied like that though. Honestly the worst thing you could've done as now they'll all know you're bothered... which was clearly the point.

@Bluntness100

I feel a bit embarrassed for you. Becayse I think you’re just going to let it go to keep him happy and also your text. It wasn’t his place to invite you. And as said, you don’t need to go to everything he does. So I’m not sure after all the advice you’ve been given on here you’ve taken the route you have.

OP, I agree with Bluntness.

I imagine you are very young and this is a new start for you (in my first job I dated the guy "who dates all the new girls" - even now, I blush at my innocence) but you really need to listen to all of us who have been through this - DO NOT TEXT THIS MAN any more. Please take the advice of @soopedup - no more desperate texts.

If you need motivation - they can forward your texts to their group chat and laugh about you - please do not give him any more ammunition.

Oh, and try to find a new job. This sounds like a toxic work environment.

Regardless of the party, being left out of the group etc, surely there was a red flag that you and the guy didn't already have your own plans for NYE?

It doesn't sound like he considers himself to be your boyfriend op. Rather someone he uses for casual sex.

It would be bizarre in the extreme not to make arrangements with a bf/gf to at least be in touch electronically on NYE and know what the other is doing.

You sound young and naive - not your fault. I wish I could give my younger self a good talking to about relationships at work! Steer clear of them!

And his latest messages are appalling - keep well away. You can do SO much better.

Time for a new job if at all possible. This place sounds toxic.

@CheetasOnFajitas

You all sound very young, intellectually sub-normal or both.

Ah how lovely - trying to make an upset poster feel even more shit. Slow handclap for you.

And now you know your status..
Let him know his.
Block and delete...

@MummytoCSJH

'No worries, I'm chilled and we don't need to chat anymore. Take care!'

Can't believe you replied like that though. Honestly the worst thing you could've done as now they'll all know you're bothered... which was clearly the point.

Im confused where does it say that anywhere?

Please stop replying now!!

@Bluntness100

I feel a bit embarrassed for you. Becayse I think you’re just going to let it go to keep him happy and also your text. It wasn’t his place to invite you. And as said, you don’t need to go to everything he does. So I’m not sure after all the advice you’ve been given on here you’ve taken the route you have.

What? She's friends with them all except for one person.

I would end the relationship to be honest OP. It's not serious for him, he's not bothered that you feel left out and hurt. It's an office clique and you're not part of it.

Leave it for a day or so then just tell him that you've decided it's not going to work out between you and it's better to end it now than carry on any further.

You need to focus on you.

If you have evidence, this needs to be reported to your management at work.