To find this a bit fishy?

[MrsToothyBitch]

I know this is a minor gripe, but the principle of it is bugging me and I feel awful for doubting my mum. Sorry it's a bit long.

I asked for a particular bedding set for Christmas from my parents and not much else. I've loved it for ages but there's always something more practical or sensible I need for the house, so I can never justify getting it. I checked parents were happy to spend that much on 1 set of double bedding and 1 extra pair of pillowcases. They were. I did the online order on mum's iPad with her details- she asked me to. I am 99% sure I included the extra pair of the pillowcases. I remember checking it was ok with my parents. The set is also a tricky colour to match so it was easier to buy 4 from the same place. The brand only recently started selling pillow cases separately to the duvet cover, too- another reason I'd not bought them previously. I remember saying that.

It arrived no problem, I was thrilled to open bedding on xmas day plus a fitted sheet to go with it, that I'd not expected but had planned to get myself. I was also busy with helping to keep the show on the road so busy and preoccupied and didn't linger over my gifts.

Anyway, it's sheet change tomorrow, and I felt a little niggle, so I've just checked and I only have 2 pillowcases for my new bedding I've been v excited to use. I've asked my mum to check and she found the paper receipt just listing the 1 set of double bedding. I asked for the original email receipt since I'm sure I ordered extra pillow cases. The email receipt cannot be found anywhere in her inbox or in deleted emails. She usually keeps EVERYTHING and is fairly computer literate, I just did the ordering since she was busy. She's immediately suggested I order more.

AIBU to find this fishy and to think she's rung up or emailed to cancel my extras? My mum also has form for being a bit wily or using "technicalities" to her favour when she thinks she'll get away with it so I don't completely trust her anymore. She also v quickly commented that "most people just have plain" on extra pillowcases. She definitely has the nerve to style this out, too. She's a cool customer.

I honestly don't mind paying for more myself especially since they got me a fitted sheet instead- I just wish they'd said so I could've sorted something out pre Christmas and pre being all excited to FINALLY use my lovely dream bedding. I just want to know if it was my mistake in the first place. The lack of the original email - where I can see if I made a cock up, is bothering me. Will email myself a copy next time. I don't want a fight and I hope I'm being U ...

Jeez...Pillow cases?! 900 + deaths per day due to Covid but missing pillowcases rule the day. Dont be ungrateful, you are lucky if that's all you have to worry about. I guess they must be fancy ones to make such a drama

So next time tesco charge you twice fir the same item or you get change for a 10 when you handed the cashier a 20 you will shrug it off saying to yourself " people have died being ripped off is nothing " ?

Drama aside surely its actually always worth checking what you were sent is what was actually ordered? Or does everyone randomly accept and ignore mistakes cos someone else has it worse somewhere else ?

Sorry if someone has already said this but really can't be assed to read a full thread on this...

But why would she cancel the extra pillowcases then buy an extra fitted sheet? I don't get that...

Non issue

@Whatwouldscullydo I think the thing is, the OP isn't concerned that her mum might have been charged for something that hasn't arrived. I would totally get that - and would understand why you might want to check.

The OP has explicitly said in her updates that she isn't letting her mum get away with being sneaky and isn't prepared to let it drop. That's the issue. She's not worried about overcharging, she's miffed because she thinks her mum changed her gift and is demanding that she explains why. It's bonkers.

It is also odd that the mother is being so cagey with it all too.

I mean my parents and I would always check and hang on to receipts or packaging etc incase we needed to send it back.

A photo of this begging might help us...

Bedding!!

@Whatwouldscullydo To be fair, maybe the mum is being cagey because the OP is a massive pain in the arse. And judging by their comments on this thread, I don't find that hard to believe. Maybe the mum did take the pillowcases off and knows that if they fess up the OP will never, ever let it drop. I'd say that's entirely feasible.

She bought you a gift - well, paid for an order that you requested and completed on her ipad. I think if she changed it she is within her rights, for whatever reasons. Just buy yourself another set.

@ExhaustedFlamingo

I have a complicated parent relationship - yet I still cannot even begin to fathom the audacity of demanding to know if she cancelled the pillowcases or not. You cannot blame your brattish behaviour on your difficult mother. You’ve already said she bought you other, unexpected things which were more expensive. And that you can afford the buy the EXTRA pillowcases yourself.

This isn’t how gift-giving works. You don’t get to demand they buy you all the extras and launch an investigation if you don’t get everything you want. You said you’re “not willing to write it off”. It’s a fucking gift 😳😳😳 I don’t think I’ve ever seen a better embodiment of self-entitlement. Honestly gobsmacked that anyone would think you’re in the right.

You raised it with her, she denies all knowledge. That’s where you stop. Accept the situation or if you’re as direct as you claim, just ask her outright if she took them off after. If she denies it, then you accept her answer even if you don’t believe it. Why? Because it’s a gift!!!!! She can do what she wants and she doesn’t owe you a forensic explanation.

Your behaviour is incredibly ill-mannered and ungrateful, and you sound like extremely hard work.

Very much this.

I think MN is weird with gifts in general.

Asking fir something is rude

Suggesting money is rude

Ordering what you want within the boundries given is rude

Wanting to check what you ordered is what you got is rude

Refusing to buy whats been asked for out of principle is apparently acceptable. As is giving any old crap be it the wrong size, wrong colour out of date, would send them to hospital of they ate it , not what they said they would get and anyone who isn't sending thank you letters written in unicorn blood for even deliberately passive aggressive gift stunts is the one in the wrong.

As a pp said, if they are unable to see situations where actually the gift is not a gift then they are lucky because no ones done it to them.

I would however love to know what really happened here.... shame games and suspicion on both sides is preventing anyone from performing the very sensible task of checking an order.

Ridiculous that being ripped off is a price people are prepared to pay to prove a point.

you sound like hard work

Best let it go, your mistake 😭
Mam stamping her style on you 🤣
Who cares
Buy your own bits and enjoy it.