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Original poster

Sex Cape

241 replies

iCrochetSoIDontKillPeople · 29/12/2020 10:35

About to get into a quickie when DH wrapped duvet around his shoulders and announced that it was his 'sex cape' ...

Anyone else married to their bestie who is also an absolute clown and can't help bringing it into the bedroom? I swear most attempts end in hysterics these days 😳🤪

OP posts:
Neotraditional · 29/12/2020 21:42

@CrotchBurn

So we have one man peeling back his ladys flaps looking for proof of vaginal birth and another with small twinkly eyes doing naked star jumps

I guess there really is someone out there for everyone

🤣🤣🤣🤣
CrotchBurn · 29/12/2020 21:42

@Bookworming
😐
I have.

BrumBoo · 29/12/2020 21:43

So we have one man peeling back his ladys flaps looking for proof of vaginal birth and another with small twinkly eyes doing naked star jumps

Its a sign of true love doncha know. If a man hasn't thoroughly inspected your vagina for signs of childbirth, you're a prude who's never had good sex Grin.

Bookworming · 29/12/2020 21:44

@Neotraditional it's a fun thread, which Brumbroo disapproves of because she wouldn't go into a shop and discuss her sex life.

She doesn't like it back off the thread, her and all the other "disapproving" Pearl clutches.

I bet they love a thread where it's a big issue with peoples relationships and all drama, but don't like a light hearted bit of fun.

The hun, as I've said before was in response with the ever tedious ODFOD from a previous poster.

And do forgive me, it I don't really care what you think!

covidaintacrime · 29/12/2020 21:46

She doesn't like it back off the thread, her and all the other "disapproving" Pearl clutches.

Why though? We're adding to the fun by taking the mickey, I only see you being the pissed off one here. And MN doesn't have any Talk Guidelines that say; "Only respond to a thread if you completely agree and / or find the OP hilarious".

BrumBoo · 29/12/2020 21:47

@TatianaBis I would have more self respect than to share that with you or anyone online. I would suggest questioning someone's sex life is getting very close to personal attacks before some very not so clever people decide to reply.

Kittykat93 · 29/12/2020 21:47

A man with small twinkly eyes doing naked star jumps GrinGrinGrinGrin

HopeYourHighHorseBucks · 29/12/2020 21:48

I actually thought this thread was going to be about a sex tape. Then loads of Witty responses pointing it out, someone declaring it for MN classics, babies being woken and dogs startling.

It was sooo much more entertaining il have to admit.

i cant stop picturing someone inspecting a fanny asking about childbirths

Neotraditional · 29/12/2020 21:49

[quote Bookworming]@Neotraditional it's a fun thread, which Brumbroo disapproves of because she wouldn't go into a shop and discuss her sex life.

She doesn't like it back off the thread, her and all the other "disapproving" Pearl clutches.

I bet they love a thread where it's a big issue with peoples relationships and all drama, but don't like a light hearted bit of fun.

The hun, as I've said before was in response with the ever tedious ODFOD from a previous poster.

And do forgive me, it I don't really care what you think! [/quote]
Like I said, immature. If you don’t like it, back off the thread. Who do you know would actually go into a shop and talk about their sex life anyway? Very strange.

It’s a thread which some people find funny and others don’t. When you are older you may realise people have differences of opinion. You may also learn some things are best kept private

BrumBoo · 29/12/2020 21:50

[quote Bookworming]@Neotraditional it's a fun thread, which Brumbroo disapproves of because she wouldn't go into a shop and discuss her sex life.

She doesn't like it back off the thread, her and all the other "disapproving" Pearl clutches.

I bet they love a thread where it's a big issue with peoples relationships and all drama, but don't like a light hearted bit of fun.

The hun, as I've said before was in response with the ever tedious ODFOD from a previous poster.

And do forgive me, it I don't really care what you think! [/quote]
You calling me a 'pearl clutcher' doesnt make it so. This is AIBU, no one has to agree with anything posted and if you cannot grasp that then perhaps this isn't the place for you.

You also 'hunned' before the ODFOD. So don't pretend it was just in jest.

CrotchBurn · 29/12/2020 21:50

@Bookworming
Is your partner the kind who windmills his cock while making a clawing motion and saying "sexy, baby!" in an Austin powers voice?

LouJ85 · 29/12/2020 21:50

It was sooo much more entertaining il have to admit

It's in equal measures the most bizarre and entertaining thread I've ever read on here Grin

Bookworming · 29/12/2020 21:50

@covidaintacrime you honestly think this should be on the sex board 😀😀😀!!

How very dare a woman mention the sex word on AIBU!

Honestly, get over yourself a lighthearted mention of a funny sexual encounter does not need to be designated to the sex board.

Also the sex board is only available for members that have been registered a number of months, OP may not be!

Candyfloss99 · 29/12/2020 21:51

@BrumBoo

Yes. You both sound 'proper mad like'. What hilarity.
This was funnier tbh 🤣
Bookworming · 29/12/2020 21:51

@Bookworming
Is your partner the kind who windmills his cock while making a clawing motion and saying "sexy, baby!" in an Austin powers voice?

Sadly not! But he does have a fabulous sense of humour and is great in bed!

Does yours do that?

CrotchBurn · 29/12/2020 21:52

@Bookworming
This encounter is neither funny nor sexual.

This is the crux of the issue.

covidaintacrime · 29/12/2020 21:52

Bookworming, you have an issue with people not agreeing with you and the OP in AIBU. I figured the sex board might give some release to your delicate sensibilities when it comes to people disagreeing with you.

suggestionsplease1 · 29/12/2020 21:56

Why is the measure of what could / should be posted on mumsnet equated with what might be declared out loud in a shop?Confused

I find that a really bizarre parallel to make.

Candyfloss99 · 29/12/2020 21:57

@Armychefbethebest

I knew my fella was a keeper when after the first time we had done the deed he said how many of the kids were c section ? Non I said , theres no way 4 came out of there he said I need to look at this , cue armychef lying there legs akimbo whilst he gives me a very close up check up to make sure my lady bits are mine ... I think haha wasnt much more I could do but laugh and think well this is different , good job I liked him eh haha x
This is not funny.
Angrymum22 · 29/12/2020 22:01

This thread is probably the most entertaining one I’ve seen on AIBU. The sexually relaxed v the sexually repressed.
Lack of inhibition is essential for good sex. If it includes humour and watching your normally uptight DH do a striptease John Cleese style ( Fish called Wanda) then you know your going to have a good time.
And if more men spent time examining their partners lady bits maybe the 40% of women who miss out on orgasm would enjoy what the rest of us regularly receive.

SteelMack · 29/12/2020 22:01

@WouldstrokeTomHardy

I'd do more than stroke it dear. I'd suck it dry. Thanks for the lecture on MN handle morality though 🍆
Hahahahahaha. Best thing I've read on MN ever!
BrumBoo · 29/12/2020 22:02

@suggestionsplease1

Why is the measure of what could / should be posted on mumsnet equated with what might be declared out loud in a shop?Confused

I find that a really bizarre parallel to make.

It really isn't that difficult to see the parallels, surely. If you wouldn't shout it out in public, why share it on a public forum. It is essentially the same thing. MN isn't a group of mates chatting over a bottle or 5 of wine, not everyone wants to know that your husband decorates his balls, or inspects your privates. You don't have to agree its tmi, but others are entitled to think it.
TiggeryBear · 29/12/2020 22:02

I can imagine my DP doing exactly that OP.
But then, DP also has boxers which glow in the dark 🙄😂 every so often (after coming back from the bathroom before bed) I walk in the bedroom to find him chuckling with his head under the duvet admiring the glow in the dark pants. 🤦‍♀️😂

covidaintacrime · 29/12/2020 22:04

The sexually relaxed v the sexually repressed.

No. I mean I'm sexually repressed as hell but it has little to do with my views on this thread. I just think it's not funny because it's not my sense of humour.

Bookworming · 29/12/2020 22:06

It really isn't that difficult to see the parallels, surely. If you wouldn't shout it out in public, why share it on a public forum. It is essentially the same thing. MN isn't a group of mates chatting over a bottle or 5 of wine, not everyone wants to know that your husband decorates his balls, or inspects your privates. You don't have to agree its tmi, but others are entitled to think it.

You wouldn't shoot out in public

Your husband was having an affair
Your periods are erratic and you don't know why
Your husband has a porn issue
You've lost your sex drive and don't know what
You fancy the girl/bloke you work with and he/she is engaged but you feel a connection
You have overspent this Christmas and your partner us going to be angry

Lots of posts are "over sharing" and this one was just a bit light hearted, a welcome relief IMO.

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