Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Emotional abuse in Harry Potter

516 replies

MrsRogerLima · 29/12/2020 08:58

Don't get me wrong, I love Harry Potter but I never thought about the Ron/Hermione thing this way before and she is SO RIGHT.

AIBU to think this is irresponsible in children's literature?

www.bustle.com/articles/198364-ron-hermiones-relationship-in-harry-potter-wasnt-just-disappointing-but-dangerous

OP posts:
TheBuffster · 30/12/2020 00:02

Lucius Malfoy definitely crush worthy.
Like love potion crush not magic hand crush.

AccidentallyOnPurpose · 30/12/2020 00:03

@PoleToPole

Grin Sadly no Baileys, I haven`t had it in years, more`s the pity.

I did think Luna was brilliant, and I always really liked Lucius Malfoy, both actor and character. DH is horrified - he is of the staunchly side with the Order of the Phoenix.

If we're confessing to that I really like Bellatrix (and love the actress).

Has anyone seen the fan made Sisters of the house Black?

PoleToPole · 30/12/2020 00:03

That's why you can read threads properly pu Grin

Grin Yes, being on the side of good always seems a bit restrictive really, and not so much room for career progression.

TheBuffster · 30/12/2020 00:04

No, but gonna now!

TheBuffster · 30/12/2020 00:05

Pahahaha. Yeah Voldemort probably had an internship program.

Wheresmykimchi · 30/12/2020 00:05

I adore Bellatrix.

PoleToPole · 30/12/2020 00:06

Lucius Malfoy definitely crush worthy.

Yes, very much so Blush.

I like Bellatrix too, especially the scene in the film where she is walking down the tables.

Wheresmykimchi · 30/12/2020 00:07

@PoleToPole

That's why you can read threads properly pu Grin

Grin Yes, being on the side of good always seems a bit restrictive really, and not so much room for career progression.

Much prefer Snape and Voldy to saint POTTER

Oh and how fit was Oliver. Criminally underused.

AccidentallyOnPurpose · 30/12/2020 00:07

@TheBuffster

Pahahaha. Yeah Voldemort probably had an internship program.
GrinGrin

I didn't say it was great. But quite fun and interesting.

There's a snape one too.

AccidentallyOnPurpose · 30/12/2020 00:10

@Wheresmykimchi

I adore Bellatrix.
She's just so brilliantly bonkers and deranged.

As another point I found it interesting how surprised/concerned JKR was at the adoration and romanticisation of Draco by her fans.

Wheresmykimchi · 30/12/2020 00:13

@AccidentallyOnPurpose

I'm a bad egg for laughing when she taunts/tortures.

I'm not a Draco fan. But I think he's one of the best developed actors from beginning to end.

PoleToPole · 30/12/2020 00:20

An internship with Voldemort would certainly keep you on your toes Grin.

I do like Draco too, he seems to have much more depth than Harry, but I suppose it is probably much easier to write depth with villains, or tortured souls.

I have always felt so sorry for Snape at just how used he was, and how it must have been so easy to go down the wrong path and then not be able to turn back.

James, Sirius, and Peter seemed awful, genuinely not sure what Lily saw in James, perhaps she would have been better off with Remus, if he could ditch the martyr complex for a bit?

Wheresmykimchi · 30/12/2020 00:21

@PoleToPole

An internship with Voldemort would certainly keep you on your toes Grin.

I do like Draco too, he seems to have much more depth than Harry, but I suppose it is probably much easier to write depth with villains, or tortured souls.

I have always felt so sorry for Snape at just how used he was, and how it must have been so easy to go down the wrong path and then not be able to turn back.

James, Sirius, and Peter seemed awful, genuinely not sure what Lily saw in James, perhaps she would have been better off with Remus, if he could ditch the martyr complex for a bit?

Oh no . Remus is almost as insufferable as Harry.

What about Sirius 💖

PoleToPole · 30/12/2020 00:28

I do have a soft spot for Remus, if only he could stand up for himself a bit more.
I like Sirius, but he is so awful to Snape, continuing with the nicknames even as adults, plus he seems like a bit too much of a commitment phobe for Lily, or anyone really.

Are there any characters without some major character flaw? Probably not, it is often peoples` failings which make the angst and drive the story.

PoleToPole · 30/12/2020 00:29

That said, personally I like Sirius an awful lot Blush

Wheresmykimchi · 30/12/2020 00:32

@PoleToPole

I do have a soft spot for Remus, if only he could stand up for himself a bit more. I like Sirius, but he is so awful to Snape, continuing with the nicknames even as adults, plus he seems like a bit too much of a commitment phobe for Lily, or anyone really.

Are there any characters without some major character flaw? Probably not, it is often peoples` failings which make the angst and drive the story.

Oliver 😍😍😍😍
PoleToPole · 30/12/2020 00:35

Oliver

Grin Yes, I think he is actually the only one isn`t he?

AccidentallyOnPurpose · 30/12/2020 00:38

@PoleToPole

An internship with Voldemort would certainly keep you on your toes Grin.

I do like Draco too, he seems to have much more depth than Harry, but I suppose it is probably much easier to write depth with villains, or tortured souls.

I have always felt so sorry for Snape at just how used he was, and how it must have been so easy to go down the wrong path and then not be able to turn back.

James, Sirius, and Peter seemed awful, genuinely not sure what Lily saw in James, perhaps she would have been better off with Remus, if he could ditch the martyr complex for a bit?

James supposedly grew up a bit by their 7th year. He was also a very accomplished wizard as was she and they were head boy and head girl. However she only goes out with him after he promises to leave snape alone and things go from there.

I think what she really saw in him was his loyalty to his friends, his willingness to go against Voldemort and defending Muggles/muggle born witches and wizards.

Don't forget she was badly rejected and bullied by her sister and then her best friend turns to the dark arts and aspires to be a Death Eater despite what that would mean for her / others like her. I think snape even calls her a mudblood out of anger/embarrassment when she tries to intervene when James is bullying him.

I can see why a proven loyal,strong wizard would appeal to her.

Bow that I think about it, it does seem to be a common theme. The characters that truly display loyalty seem to get "rewards " regardless of their worthiness.

PolkadotsAndMoonbeams · 30/12/2020 01:11

@PoleToPole

I do have a soft spot for Remus, if only he could stand up for himself a bit more. I like Sirius, but he is so awful to Snape, continuing with the nicknames even as adults, plus he seems like a bit too much of a commitment phobe for Lily, or anyone really.

Are there any characters without some major character flaw? Probably not, it is often peoples` failings which make the angst and drive the story.

McGonagall maybe? She's pretty wonderful.
ChestnutStuffing · 30/12/2020 01:57

@bluebluezoo

These are imaginary characters... but can I object to the thought that an intelligent adult woman can’t choose to marry someone less academic?

My comment wasn’t so much about her not marrying someone as academic (i’m married to someone with barely any o’levels) but their pathways in life are so clearly different. One would have to significantly compromise- ron’s a homebody like his parents, that’s not Hermione’s life choice. She’s off to rule the world, and has the potential to do so.

The relationship with ron seems like are far bigger compromise on her ideals than his.

Yes I know they’re fictional, and I know I’m projecting, but I was alway a bit Wtf JK, you hat the opportunity to make this one of the most powerful women in the ‘verse, but you chose to send her down the traditional “womens” roles.

I don't know. I can see Hermione going far in politics, and Ron being a stay at home dad.

Alternately, she might be come an all-in-homeschooling mum while he works for the civil service.

CandyLeBonBon · 30/12/2020 02:13

@MoodyMarshall

I understand why Ron is a passive-aggressive sulker.

He's 6th of 7 children (Mrs Weasley kept trying until she finally had a girl). His older twin brothers have ADHD and take up a lot of Mrs Weasley's headspace. His three eldest brothers are overachievers with firm ideas regarding their vocation. His best friend is the boy who lived and better at Quidditch than him. His other best friend is the most intelligent person in the school.

I'd be permanently miffed, tbf.

Yes. I've only got 3 kids and they have all gone through that 'yeah but sibling x can do y...' about each other. I love and adore them all but they all come out and develop their own personalities and individual personas. You can nurture as much as you like but no one is a replicant are they. Every single human being (muggle or otherwise) develops an independent self.
CandyLeBonBon · 30/12/2020 02:14

I still love lupin. Why are we not talking about him?

sauceyorange · 30/12/2020 10:20

@Shamoo

I love JKR and think she is a great writer. What is interesting though in the context of this discussion (and I LOVE HP) is that in the Strike books, which again I think are fantastic, Strike is consistently an absolute bastard to Robin - and yet it's clearly a love story in which we are meant to want them to be together. She forgives him when he is occasionally nice to her, and (in my experience) we the readers do too. But I thought for quite a large part of Troubled Blood that taking a step back he is, in the whole, awful to her. Won't say more as don't want to give anything away for those who haven't read.

Maybe that's how JKR likes to write her love stories? Or maybe it reflects a little of her view of love? Who knows!

I thought Troubled Blood showed a shifting dynamic between them - changes on both their sides. Part of the whole environment I think she's trying to explore is how consistently and constantly women have to adapt to casual and deliberate misogyny, from all the men around us. And how we always end up at the point of saying 'but at least he...' out of exhaustion. I don't think she's saying that all relationships are inherently biased, but showing how a young woman navigates that world
Wheresmykimchi · 30/12/2020 12:19

@CandyLeBonBon

I still love lupin. Why are we not talking about him?
Lupin got an honourable mention earlier but I distracted them with Sirius Grin
Wheresmykimchi · 30/12/2020 12:19

@PoleToPole

I do have a soft spot for Remus, if only he could stand up for himself a bit more. I like Sirius, but he is so awful to Snape, continuing with the nicknames even as adults, plus he seems like a bit too much of a commitment phobe for Lily, or anyone really.

Are there any characters without some major character flaw? Probably not, it is often peoples` failings which make the angst and drive the story.

DOBBY!!!!