Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Final decision - remaining childfree or not

160 replies

TheIceTree · 28/12/2020 13:15

I have recently turned 40. I have never really experienced the feeling of wanting kids as such. When I was younger I assumed that the desire might hit me at some later point, but it never really did. But now I am slightly questioning my decision, as I’m in the last chance saloon (or perhaps already too late, I realise) in terms of age.

There are some good solid reasons why remaining childfree would seem to be the best plan. I am a fairly classic introvert – I like quiet time and space to myself. I don’t feel ‘maternal’. When I see babies I don’t want to hold them or anything. In general, I don’t particularly enjoy the company of children, based on spending time with nieces/nephews and friends’ children. I also just can't picture myself doing things like baby talk, or singing nursery rhymes, or role play games. Due to all this, I fear I may be bad at parenthood, or that it would be a case of surviving rather than thriving.

We also love travel and I would certainly dislike limitations being placed on this part of our lives, post-Covid.

It feels like I’ve answered my own question. But something is making me question if I’m missing something – I guess essentially it is a kind of FOMO. I do like the idea of having an adult child when I’m older (but don’t like the idea of the stages in between). I also like the idea of a meaningful ‘project’ for the next phase of our lives. I fear that later in life we may regret having no children, but equally I’m aware that a certain proportion of people do, to some degree, regret having children, (and that would be worse in my opinion). I also suspect I’m the type of person who might regret it, for the reasons above.

I’d love to hear thoughts from anyone who felt very conflicted about this issue, and either remained childfree, or went on to have a child.

OP posts:
Cornetttttto · 28/12/2020 13:18

You've answered your own question. Follow your gut, enjoy your freedom.

MatildaTheCat · 28/12/2020 13:21

The stuff you think you’d enjoy such as having adult DC is based on fantasy, you might have a great relationship but plenty don’t.

Look at building long term solid relationship ps with your DNs and then you’ll have something similar.

LividLover · 28/12/2020 13:23

I went through a lot (understatement) to have my baby at 39 and I knew that I would literally be willing to die trying, such was my overwhelming need to be a mum.

It’s still incredibly tough at times!

In all honesty, it doesn’t sound right for you.

Piglet89 · 28/12/2020 13:23

I would definitely advise against.

I do like the idea of having an adult child when I’m older (but don’t like the idea of the stages in between).

The stages in between can be hard, hard yards so I really wouldn’t bother. In addition (and I recognise you put inverted commas around it) - another human being is not a project.

VestaTilley · 28/12/2020 13:23

I have one DS.

You should only have children if you really, really want them. At times it is staggeringly hard, especially with a newborn. The exhaustion and relentlessness is unreal.

I adore my son, but if you don’t like children or aren’t sure you want them I really wouldn’t do it. At 40 you’ll be used to living your life a certain way, doing what you want when you want - are you prepared for all that to end? Because it does. For years. Babies need routine and stability, if you have one you need to prepare for the structure of your life to alter for good.

Don’t do it just because you’re worried about FOMO- that’s no reason to bring a child in to this world.

JacobReesMogadishu · 28/12/2020 13:24

I don’t know the answer but just wanted to say that I don’t particularly enjoy spending time with other kids other than my own. Never have done. Only have one and she’s 19yo now and I wouldn’t be without her. Most of the time she’s fun to be around and good company.

Yes some of the younger years weren’t all great. Yes there was some nursery rhymes and curtailing of freedom to some extent. But never did role playing games....I kept her entertained more on my terms. Jigsaws, Lego, board games which I liked. Don’t get me wrong, she liked it as well.

Days out were good, I got to quite like going to the zoo, the beach, a national trust place, bike rides. Never did soft play and didn’t go to the park,often.

We still went on holiday abroad. Kids are quite portable.

Hailtomyteeth · 28/12/2020 13:25

Don't do it. You don't want to.

I don't regret having a child, but the experience I had in raising her was different from the experience she had in being raised by me. So if I had my time again, I would choose to be unselfish, to forgo my wish to have a child, and not bring anyone into the world.

Twelveisthebestnumber · 28/12/2020 13:26

Crikey. I could have written these exact same words at your age. I kept waiting to feel maternal and it just never happened. DH and I both agreed that if I hit 40 and still felt that way he would have the snip. I reached 40 and we decided to wait another year. Eventually aged 43 whilst abroad I had routine gynae surgery and they tied my tubes without asking. When they told me I just felt relief that the decision had been made for me. I have an amazing life. We retired very young and travel all the time. I do however have the most amazing DSS who I am incredibly close to. If I didn't have him I'm not so sure I would feel the same.

TheVanguardSix · 28/12/2020 13:26

Reading your honest post, with lots of insight into who you are- you know you- I think I'd give having kids a miss. It's such a huge, huge, huge thing. I am very much an introvert who needs lots of headspace. I also really, with every cell of my body to the point of painful longing, wanted kids. If I didn't have that urge, I definitely wouldn't have had kids for the sake of having them.
You're happy. Fulfilled. If it ain't broke... and all that. Kids aren't a solution or an answer or an obligation or a box tick.

sararh · 28/12/2020 13:26

Watching this thread with interest. I'm a bit younger than you, OP, but other than that you've described me to a tee.

katy1213 · 28/12/2020 13:26

I'm sure the deep regret of wishing you hadn't is much worse than the occasional twinge of what if.

LawnFever · 28/12/2020 13:28

Unless you desperately want a child then in all honesty trying at 40 may be filled with more heartache than necessary for something you’re not entirely convinced you want

Speaking from experience of not being able to conceive/ivf... it’s definitely not something that I’d have wanted to go through on a whim & also I was only offered ivf before I was 40 so if you needed it/wanted it you may not be offered it on the NHS

Notthe9oclocknewsathon · 28/12/2020 13:29

I think you have made a really realistic assessment. Perhaps you might be interested in mentoring teens or something like that? Or even fostering older teens?

Lougle · 28/12/2020 13:31

Honestly, I wouldn't, given your description of your feelings.

Cornetttttto · 28/12/2020 13:32

@katy1213

I'm sure the deep regret of wishing you hadn't is much worse than the occasional twinge of what if.
It is.
Plussizejumpsuit · 28/12/2020 13:33

I'm child free age 35. Tbh all of your reasons to have children just sound like social expectations and what ifs. Don't do it.

Fallox · 28/12/2020 13:35

www.amazon.co.uk/Baby-Decision-Make-Important-Choice-ebook/dp/B01FSZ51J6?tag=mumsnetforu03-21

I've heard good things about this book

CounsellorTroi · 28/12/2020 13:35

If you've hitherto been happily childfree and are only thinking about it now because your window of opportunity is starting to close, then I wouldn't. As a PP said, if it aint broke don't fix it.

Lemonpiano · 28/12/2020 13:36

The horrific way women are treated by NHS maternity services is a pretty good reason to stay childfree - unless being violated, having your consent disregarded, being deeply traumatised, and left with lifelong physical and mental injuries is appealing.

Oh, and then having the special privilege of them blaming you for it and covering up what they did to you. Super.

Can you afford private maternity healthcare?

Brunt0n · 28/12/2020 13:38

I wouldn’t. You enjoy your life, why change that? You also need to think about how you would feel if you had a child with additional needs or disability (sadly more likely to occur the older you get).

EPea · 28/12/2020 13:40

I was always on the fence - lots of similar thoughts to the ones you're describing. We now have one DS. I love him more than I ever could have imagined but the impact on my life, our marriage, my sense of self, my professional identity, my feelings of competence as a capable person... enormous. All immeasurably changed forever. It is so much harder than I ever could have imagined. Now my son is here and I know him, I wouldn't trade that relationship for the world. But, if my younger, child-free self had caught a glimpse of the future reality of parenting; the exhaustion, the relentlessness; I would've remained child-free. You know yourself best, trust your instinct.

WonderingFree · 28/12/2020 13:41

Maybe you can build that relationship you envisage but with your nieces/nephews?

Piglet89 · 28/12/2020 13:42

The courageous (and still fairly rare) honesty from @EPea is why Mumsnet is such an important resource.

Whatisthepoint10 · 28/12/2020 13:48

You don’t want children, it’s clear as day. Don’t do it. There’s zero reason unless you have the inner urge to have children.

MoiraRosesWig · 28/12/2020 13:49

I'm an introvert who loves travel and was totally non maternal.

Fell pregnant by accident and thank God I did. My little boy is an absolute wonder.

I think I'm enjoying motherhood a million times more because I had very low expectations.

You can't always predict how you'll react.