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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

aibu to not understand why dog owners let their dogs sleep with them in bed?

331 replies

firthy85 · 27/12/2020 18:14

to get things straight i am a pet lover and grew up with many different dog breeds. some with great personalities of their own and good company but they are pets at the end of the day right?. i never had any problem if a dog wanted to sleep in my bedroom but they had a dog's bed. surely encouraging a dog to sleep in your bed is setting the dog up for a fall? god forbid something ever happened to you as the owner and the dog had to be rehomed it could be a nightmare for the dog's new owner if they are strict about dog/human boundaries. so what do you think?

OP posts:
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11
ilovepixie · 27/12/2020 21:31

Love having my dog sleep with me. The way she curls up beside me and her sigh of contentment as she settles down melts my heart. She's small and doesn't cast or smell. And before we got her I wasn't a dog lover at all and would of been horrified at sharing my life, home and bed with a dog. Now I wouldn't be without her.

Cribbles · 27/12/2020 21:33

Sorry. new to this . Thank you , I have reposted . X

VetOnCall · 27/12/2020 21:42

We have 5 dogs and are child free by choice so I don't worry too much about where the dogs come in the "chain of my family environment" (whatever that is). They all sleep on the bed with us - it's a very big bed, we got it shipped up to Canada from the US. The bed is hoovered daily and sheets/throws are all changed every other day. They're all extremely well trained and well behaved working gundogs, and they would all be fine to sleep downstairs if I told them to, but we all prefer them being on the bed so bed it is 😄

Crankley · 27/12/2020 21:42

My old cat used to sleep on me, with his head tucked under my chin and his paw round my neck. I miss him.

Mousemay · 27/12/2020 21:54

Not your bed so not your problem Hmm how do we know what anyone does in or on their bed. I change my bed every five or so days as I have pets that at the least jump up and sleep at the bottom. I have white bedding which helps to see any dirt etc. I also know people with no pets that don't change their bed for weeks at a time. I would bet my bed is always cleaner. Never sure why people worry about what others do in their own home.

ArchieStar · 27/12/2020 22:03

When we rescued my dog she still had milk in her teats from the puppies that had been snatched away from her (via a bin bag if her reaction to bin bags is anything to go by), it seems we are the first proper human contact she’s had in a while. So if sleeping on my bed eases her anxiety even in the slightest, I’ll let her. She may not be here for the rest of my life, but I’m making damn sure she knows she’s loved and wanted for the rest of hers.

Lynchpin2018 · 27/12/2020 22:10

@ArchieStar Beautiful and couldn’t agree more 😻

unicornparty · 27/12/2020 22:15

I find it disgusting. I couldn't be in a relationship with someone who did this. Luckily dp is of the same opinion as me. Grin

Member869894 · 27/12/2020 22:16

I love my dog sleeping with me. The sound of him snoring gently melts my heart. He doesn't shed and is not huge which helps

stackemhigh · 27/12/2020 22:20

I love dogs but don't think I could have one. I was at the park today and the dogs were having a great time jumping in the puddles, but they got so muddy!

Do the dogs get bathed every time they get mud on them? If not, wouldn't the carpets/sofa/bed get muddy?

Pipandmum · 27/12/2020 22:24

My dogs sleep at the bottom of my bed on top of the covers. One of them occasionally sleeps in my daughters room and she cuddles him. As we hug and kiss them during the day I don't see the difference at night.

MrsFluffyMuff · 27/12/2020 22:27

My bedroom is a dog free zone, that's just the way I like it. He has his own double duvet and pillows downstairs though.

StormcloakNord · 27/12/2020 22:34

I'm not sure why to be honest.

He just seems so much happier/at peace on our bed. He's technically a 'rescue' thought not from bad circumstances at all and ever since I got him he's been quite clingy.

I probably could have trained him not to be on the bed but we just love seeing him happy. He's 11 so not many years left so we've plenty years after he's gone to get peace at night.

I'd just rather his last couple/few (if we're lucky) years on earth are filled with constant love!

AriesTheRam · 27/12/2020 22:37

I've never done it with mine but can totally understand the appeal.

FloresAmarillas · 27/12/2020 22:39

I prefer my dog to anyone else on earth. Why wouldn’t I let her in my bed?

EssexLioness · 27/12/2020 22:41

I find your argument about what would happen if the owner died to be a bit odd.
Agree with previous comments about sharing a bed with some of the husbands you read about on here. Plus, people share beds with babies who randomly poo and puke with no warning! My dogs have never done that. Plus I have never had a dog under the covers with me. I do understand why non dog owners may find this gross though and each to their own. Tbh I feel a bit grossed out by baby sick or a runny nappy or those ‘cute’ pics you see of babies faces smeared in food.

Titsywoo · 27/12/2020 22:41

I'm glad we never let our dog sleep in our bed (DH would have liked it but I think it is gross and anything that touches me in my sleep keeps me awake anyway). DDog now has dementia and spends most of the night wandering and panting - in our bed that would have been awful as she would have been jumping up and down all the time. Now she has access to the whole house and after a wander finally settles for a few hours then wanders again to another room.

butterycooler · 27/12/2020 22:42

What the fuck has it got to do with anyone else who/what someone has in their bed?

If you aren't sleeping in it, mind your own business.

Titsywoo · 27/12/2020 22:42

She is also incontinent and sometimes leaks through her nappy so that isn't coming on my lovely bed!

Generallybewildered · 27/12/2020 22:43

I adopted my grandmother’s terrier when she was 10 (the dog not my gran!). She had slept for a decade on my grandmother’s bed. We transferred her to sleeping downstairs in a basket within 5 days - basket at side of bed, bottom of bed, other side of bedroom, on landing, bottom of stairs. No problem. I know we were probably lucky but she adapted amazingly well and we had her for another 6 years.

MispyM · 27/12/2020 22:46

stackemhigh

Bathed?
We do towel ours when we get home (if required, which is a very regular occurrence).

Butchyrestingface · 27/12/2020 22:47

I would let DP (Dear Parrot) sleep in bed with me, but I'm afraid I'd roll over in my sleep and crush him. Sad

There was that one time, years ago, when I slept on the couch so my sick budgie could have the double bed (he had the snuffles).

Oneearringlost · 27/12/2020 22:51

@1992serpent

Stupid thing to do. Remember that woman who had her fa e ripped off by her dog?
I read that as 'fanny'
PreyingMantlepiece · 27/12/2020 22:57

Mine was very very old when I adopted him and had been spoilt. I realised I wasn't going to teach him not to. And I love having him in the bed with me.

I have issues with things being clean enough, particularly when it comes to my bed. But he was always clean, I wiped or washed his paws regularly, specially when he had gone out for the toilet.

It was very reassuring and comforting for me to have him there.

emilyfrost · 27/12/2020 22:58

Because the majority of animal owners struggle with boundaries and hygiene.

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