To think this is the most fucking annoying comeback on Mumsnet

[Hobnobswantshernameback]

"Well at least you have a mother/dog/budgie/great aunt mine is dead and I'd give anything to have them here"

Yes we should all suck up the most awful behaviour from other people and be grateful for their mere existence as one day they will be dead
Someone says that they are in some way annoyed by someone else's behaviour
And
Every
Ducking
Time
"Well at least you have a father (even if he is a serial killer) mine is dead and I'd give anything to have them back"
Aaagghhhhh

@Fcuk38

I think when you have been through the a bereavement your entire outlook on things changes. I lost my husband at 38 and I now have a different outlook/ perspective on everything whereas before I would have completely agreed with you.

Toxic relationships are a bereavement. It’s complex grief. The difference is you’ve lost what you can’t have, not what you did have.

@KatharinaRosalie

OP: "Our non-negotiable outgoings are 2X quid this month, we have exhausted all our savings and have only X coming in.." Posters: "Wow! X! I would live like a king on X!"

You missed out 'and create six exciting meals for four from a single chicken'

At least you have shit. I haven't had shit for a while. Be grateful for a shit.

🤣🤣🤣

My nominations would be the

" I simply cannot get worked up about this" . Either implies the replier is far far too busy to get involved in whatever petty squabbles the OP is having trouble with.....or they're a lazy fecker who CBA .

And (in CF Childcare threads where the OP isn;t a childminder)
The airy replies of "Text them and say My fees are £10/hour +snacks "

Only a refistered CM can charge for childcare , unless it's babysitting.
But lets not let the law get in the way of a 'hilarious' comeback

Boils Piss
Teeth Itch
etc

I am tempted to nc now and go do the most ridiculous "at least" on every thread😂

@LightDrizzle

YANBU! Along with “At least your parents/ in-laws are interested in your children, in 7 years mine have looked after mine once for 3 hours” - in response to a post about someone’s mum/ MIL going nuclear because they haven’t been allowed their 10 week old grandchild overnight without its parents in their fag smoke and Komodo dragon filled house .

Oh and the bitchplop and run posters
Wankers

I hate “ You should try the Freedom Programme” . It might be well intentioned, but it comes across as if it’s that’s simple

To be fair I'd never heard of the freedom programme until I got on MN. But it's bloody brilliant. I know it's not that simple, but it's a step in the right direction. I found it helpful anyway. Tinkly laughs etc are irritating though.

I have found myself thinking this in the past when it was a matter of days/weeks since I lost a parent, I don't think I ever said it though, I hope that I didn't.

I know I stayed well away from the bereavement boards because I was unable to feel anything other than envy for people who had had longer with their parent than I had had with mine and knew I would not be able to write anything other than grossly unreasonable, unhinged replies. Grief does strange things to us and really messes up our emotional reactions.

70 “ Only a refistered CM can charge for childcare , unless it's babysitting.”

Because I’ve got the giggles, I’m now howling at what a refisted childminder might be. 😂

Closely related to the misery Olympics - the race to the bottom that occurs in a lot of work-related threads. Someone will complain that eg their boss expects one hour of unpaid overtime a day. Instead of sympathising or suggesting solutions all the replies are “You’re lucky, I work 15 hours every day” or “I never take my annual leave allowance” etc etc. Or the best one I saw recently - someone was working from home to intensely and for such long hours they apparently didn’t have time to open the curtains in their house in the morning!

YANBU, this annoys me so fucking much

Following the logic, noone should ever be angry/moan about anything at all. As there will always be someone worse off.

@WorraLiberty

Great thread @Hobnobswantshernameback, although I do need to report that my 9 year old found “did you mean to be so rude?” quite effective with some minor bullying at school I can’t see her pulling off the tinkly laugh, though...

@caperplips

I nominate: Give your head a wobble And Are you on glue As two of the most ridiculous things said with depressing frequency on MN I do not know a single person in real life who would ever say such silly things (thank God!)

Nah. Give your head a wobble is code for "You are being beyond ridiculous, but if I say what I actually think, my post will be deleted". By far not the most ridiculous thing said on MN. You need to spend much more time on MN if you believe that. And of course, give your head a wobble...

@youvegottenminuteslynn

Oh come on now, it's not the most annoying... suggestions of rubbish comebacks and then "tinkly laugh" has that honour

Yes! I would add though, only after you have said the rubbish hugely long comeback "breezily"

I hate ‘Are you me?’

Obviously not, twat!

Acorn I really should proof read .

Meant registered

I find it more annoying in RL when someone says 'But she's your Mum and in the end that's all that matters'. I like to correct them that I have nothing to feel grateful for or loyal to. My Mum is awful and I feel no guilt that I don't love her.

My FIL knows the whole sorry tale but still rounded our last conversation off with, 'but you'll miss her when she's gone'. Some people are perverse.

Haha yes I HATE it.

I know I'm lucky, but that doesn't mean that nothing is ever going to annoy me.

@70isaLimitNotaTarget

Acorn I really should proof read .

Meant registered

I know

This thread just set me off laughing so hard!

@MrsBobDylan

I find it more annoying in RL when someone says 'But she's your Mum and in the end that's all that matters'. I like to correct them that I have nothing to feel grateful for or loyal to. My Mum is awful and I feel no guilt that I don't love her.

My FIL knows the whole sorry tale but still rounded our last conversation off with, 'but you'll miss her when she's gone'. Some people are perverse.

Oh dear

That’s an awful and stupid thing to say.

A counsellor told me one ‘If someone broke their wrist and someone else broke their arm... doesn’t make the broken wrist hurt any less.’

The ‘hard done by’ olympics is so attention seeking.

Years ago there was one poster whos child had died, no doubt one of the worst things anyone would ever go through. She would post on countless threads for a good couple of years afterwards 'is that all you have to moan about, at least you don't have a dead child.' it was extremely painful to watch. Didn't matter what the thread was about, could be a broken down car, someone going thorough bankruptcy etc etc. It totally shut down any conversation after that as she had a big following who would then come on and agree how selfish and insensitive the op was. One poster then called her out on it and told her people are allowed to have problems in life other than a dead child and ask for advice and got promptly banned. Like I said, extremely painful to watch.

Someone once told me that I should be in contact with my mother because if I don't one day my kids might hate me and go non contact with me
It took me till I was 41 to realise that I needed to not be in contact with my mother
The damage she has done is a long job to unpick
And one of my greatest fears is screwing up my children like my mother fucked me up
Suffice to say I have very minimal contact with this "friend" now