To share or not to share Secret Santa Scratchcard Winnings

[WoolieLiberal]

I was given a National Lottery Scratchcard as a Secret Santa gift. I thought this was a bit naff until I realised it was a winner.

I won a (low end) four figure sum. I got excited and told my colleagues.

Since then, the person who gave it to me sent me a message suggesting (in a lighthearted way) that I might want to give her half. I replied with a laugh emoji as I thought she was joking, but she has since messaged me to ask if I have decided whether I am going to do so or not!

I’ve also been asked by three other colleagues if I could “lend” them “small“ (three Figure) amounts “to help with Christmas”.

DH says I was daft to have told anyone, but it’s done now and is none of anyone else’s business. He says I should treat myself for a Change.

I’m beginning to wish I hadn’t won anything because if I respond to all requests I’ll have virtually nothing left, and if I don’t, then I’ll be thought badly of and stingy.

There’s a woman at work who works part time and is married to a very wealthy businessman (the job is more of a hobby/something to do) and they’re always jetting off on holidays to far flung destinations, having meals out, nice cars and jewellery etc. No one has ever (to my knowledge) asked her to share her wealth.

If I knew a colleague was genuinely struggling I would help but this feels like vultures are circling. DH, DD’s and I are not wealthy by any stretch but “managing”.

Thoughts welcome!!

I have no idea why you’re even considering giving any to any of them.

I would say that you've had so many requests and in the interest of fairness you will be gifting to charity.

Bloody ridiculous bunch - it's a stupid gift if they aren't prepared to accept you may win, and just awful of everyone to pressure you. If I were you I genuinely would donate a sum to charity and keep whatever you feel appropriate.

Tell them what you wish, they need to get a grip.

I'm absolutely floored by the demands of your colleagues, and especially the gifter. If she'd given you a bottle of wine would she expect you to share or take it home and enjoy? She's simply jealous and remorseful that she didn't keep it herself.

It's kind of you to want to share but I think I'd be more than inclined to say 'f it' and keep it. As Alliejay said, tell them you gave it to charity as the pressure was too much

OMG seriously, I would tell them to Fuck off. They have got an absolute cheek to ask for some money. The person who gave you the gift has an absolute cheek to ask for half.

I would never have told them I had won. What I would do is buy them all a lottery ticket, tell them good luck and see if they win anything. Cheeky fuckers the lot of them!

If you give half to your colleagues they will not be happy and will moan about you anyway

Exactly. People always beg from people who win money and only ask for 'just' what they consider a small percentage of it, but neither realise nor care that everybody has asked for that same small percentage. In theory, you could have won, say, £10,000, have 100 people asking for 'just' £200, thus twice your total win. If you felt sufficiently bullied and browbeaten, even if you did something as crazy as borrowing an extra £10,000 to pay them all, even then, most of them would not be grateful, many would grumble "So it's just the bare £200 I asked for, then, and not a single penny more?!". Meanwhile, at the same time as you having had to pay £10,000 instead of having your own £10,000 winnings, you would still be the snooty, stuck-up cow who thinks she's so great because she's loaded and will be expected to sub everybody for everything for evermore.

The brass neck of some people!

If she hadn’t asked I may have given a couple of hundred to the gifter, but the fact she asked and then chased you up would mean she saw none of the winnings.

None to the other cheeky fekkers either.

You could just say your husband collected the winnings and is going to pay of some of your mortgage/ car loan with it.

It’s difficult though if you are a people pleaser and are worried about the treatment you will receive at work.

Can't believe people are asking for a share of £2k. Just give the gifter £100 and nothing to the rest. You're crazy to share with anyone else. They all sound awful

Provided the card is even genuine, you'll be making a massive mistake giving any of your money to work colleagues. Who are these people, apart from people you happen to be working with? Think about how you'll feel in 3 years time when none of these people are in your life.

Do not give them anything OP, it's your money, it was your Christmas gift - do you think any of the others would have shared with you if they'd won? Nah.

Keep your money

Fuck that. If someone had given you a bottle of wine or a novelty loo roll would the others expect a share too?

Just tell them no. And if you want to make up an excuse just tell them you had an unexpected expense that came up like your boiler broke or your car broke down.

Do not split it. It is yours and they are cfers. I think you are either going to gave to lie or be really tough and say no to all.

I think I would lie for an easy life.

Or tell them you're so happy that they believe in sharing and spreading the Christmas love, that you've bought a charity goat on behalf of each of them, so that somebody who really needs it will benefit from the happy stroke of fortune.

@WoolieLiberal

Thanks for the responses. So as not to drip feed and answer as many of the questions:

Sadly I did tell them how much.

It was £2K. (Hopefully that’s not too outing).

The gifter only revealed herself after I’d told everyone about the win (though no-one else has claimed to be the gifter so I’m sure it’s true).

I don’t want to be dishonest with anyone by making up reasons not to give.

I know now I shouldn’t have said anything.

If it is a fake ticket it’s a very good one.

For the moment I’ve told everyone I don’t have the money yet and have had lots of requests to share so I can’t make any promises to anyone.

To make this go away I’m thinking of doing this, which doesn’t involve dishonesty:

Keep half.

Divide the rest equally between the team (including those who asked, those who didn’t ask and the gifter).

I’m hoping that will keep everyone happy (though gifter is hoping for half).

DH thinks even that is daft but has said he respects that it’s my money not his and he respects my right to
Do what I want with it and won’t give me a hard time
Over it as he has not right to.

Don’t you DARE give half away to those grabby bastards.

Take your two grand and do whatever the fuck your want with it.

My mouth actually fell open at the sheer audacity of the secret Santa messaging to ask for half never mind the other leeches.
Finders keepers, the joy of gifting a scratch card is that the recipient may well win a big amount, and Merry Christmas to them if they do!

Don’t let these wankers guilt you into giving away what is rightfully yours

I gave someone at work a SS scratch card and they won a reasonable amount.
They didn't know I was the giver and I didn't tell them.
I was just really chuffed that my last-minute naff gift turned out to be such a great one, they were absolutely delighted and I really enjoyed hearing them tell everybody that it had made their Christmas.

Say you've already given your winnings to a family member who needed it. You can't give them what you don't have

If you bought a scratch card yourself, would you consider giving half the winings to your team?

If you HADN'T told them you'd won, would you consider giving half the winnings to your team?

If your answer to bottom these questions is 'no' then you need to seriously ask yourself why you are planning to do it now. This is a question of boundaries, self worth and assertiveness.

Uh no. What sort of CF gives a fuckibg scratchcard as a secret santa!?

IF you want to be generous then chuck everyone £20 in a card and keep the rest!
No one else has any claim to it. But definitely dont do anything until you know its genuine and money is in your account.

CFs! I do think I'd buy the gifter a bottle of wine and a scratch card. Costs £10, is a nice way to say thank you and is considerably more than she gave you. Obviously nothing for the rest of them.

For the love of God, keep it. All of it. The point of getting a gift card in secret Santa is that if you get nothing, you've literally got nothing. You got lucky instead. Good for you. It's yours to keep and don't you dare feel guilty about it

Don’t share! It was your present and you won. End of.

Don't give any money away! If it was me, I'd buy something nice for the whole team (lunch out in normal times, depending how many ppl! Or bottles of wine each etc) but no need to single out the giver.

Just keeping note here so that when I win the 13 million (tonight is it ??) I’ll remember to keep quiet.

What do you think they would do in your situation?

I like the idea of giving a scratch card

Give your secret Santa as many scratch cards as they have given you

@leafygarden42

www.ebay.co.uk/b/Fake-Scratch-Cards/123859/bn_7023444883

Just had a look at this - not sure the OPs is even genuine, didn't realise this was such a thing!

I genuinely find this to be horrible. Had a friend who was fooled by one of these and she was over the moon, offering to sort her families debts and such..planning kids first holiday in years, that sort of thing.

Only to find out it was fake and her 'friend' trying to be 'funny'