Am I allowed to be upset by this

[allgoodinthehood]

Relevant
My partner is one of the nicest people you have met . He is kind, considerate, loving and generous.
He is annoyed at me because I'm upset that he hasn't got me a card for Christmas.
I've said I appreciate all that he does for me . He does alot small and big things . He would give me his last penny.
He has been to three shops today to try and get a suitable card but no luck.
He says hes annoyed Im pissed off . Ive said I'm not pissed off but I am upset that he hasnt got me a card.
He says " but you know I dont do cards " I know for a fact he would be rightfully upset if I didnt get him a birthday card.
So tell me strait AIBU
When I say upset I dont mean crying and the like I just mean Ive gone quiet but not in an angry way.
Oh and he has got me a present.

YABU why do you even want a card?

What a waste of time, money and resources - a marketing firm's sugary meaningless words

We don't waste money on shit like that - say how you actually feel instead. We don't even buy each other an anniversary card and we only buy each other birthday cards since we had children.

You sounds like hard work.....

We're in a pandemic and he's been to three shops and you're still upset. You are being very unreasonable.

Cards are for mailing. YAB totally U.

Cards are for people you don't live with! I don't do Xmas cards for my h or dc. Yabvu

Dear god, some women are stupid over a bit of cardboard! Why do you need a card from someone who's at the other end of the sofa? And if he'd picked up Covid in the 4th shop, would that prove how much he loves you? But go on, sulk. In a quiet way.

Honestly I think you are being ridiculous. Christmas cards are for posting to people you don't see - why spend money on a card for the person you are spending the day with ?

YABU, how are you upset over a card!?

Yes. This is beyond bizarre. Why, exactly, do you want him to give you a card? To show you love? But you say he already does that and you appreciate it.

I've never really understood cards between people who live together anyway but your reaction to this is really weird. Does him risking three shops during a pandemic make you feel better? Would it if he had managed to find a card? I'd recommend an apology.

Utterly ridiculous, save the planet by the trees not being cut down and something you will look at for 4 seconds ending up in landfill.

I didnt buy my son a birthday card because where will it end up? The bin!

Well done OP. We are all abit on edge.

He says " but you know I dont do cards "

Im upset because he has always said " Id rather have a nice card with lovely words in than a present "
We have always given each other lovely cards.
When I asked him about his U turn on cards he said I love receiving cards from you but I dont like giving them or words to that effect.

Ah. He's one of those.

I don't get the insistence that cards are only for people you won't see. It's a personal decision between the couple, but it only works if both of them are on the same page. This OH wants the traffic to be only one way. As evidenced by the fact that he's (he says) gone to three different shops today. If he was bothered he wouldn't have been shopping on the 22nd, he'd have looked earlier.

So no OP, I don't think you're being as unreasonable as most posters think. And while it might go against the grain for you, I'd be inclined not to get one for him next year. Just for the pleasure of saying (brightly and breezily, not bitterly) when he doesn't get one, 'but you don't do cards, so you made me think. We don't really need to send them to each other when we're together on the day'. Yes it's petty when he's good about so much, but it obviously matters to you, and that's OK, we're all different.

I have a mantle piece of 15 Christmas cards from various people (not OH) and I haven’t written one Christmas card to anyone. I’m not a Christmas card person so I hope all my neighbours and friends / family aren’t as annoyed I didn’t give them a card 🧐

Ridiculously petty.

I think it's actually stupid to give Christmas cards to people you live with, it's just so pointless.

Why write a card when you can give someone a hug and tell them Happy Christmas?

Seriously?

Ridiculous, and very much so.

(The poor fecker tried 3 times and still you’re not happy?
You do know there’s a pandemic happening yes?)

Did you post about this yesterday? If so, I think there was another issue re dinner and drinking?

Is this a joke? Given the risk to his health in every single shop, you shouldn’t even expect him to go to one shop never mind three! I didn’t get a birthday card this year and I’m fine with it because I prefer my DH to stay safe and not catch Covid for the sake of a piece of paper.

@allgoodinthehood

Relevant My partner is one of the nicest people you have met . He is kind, considerate, loving and generous. He is annoyed at me because I'm upset that he hasn't got me a card for Christmas. I've said I appreciate all that he does for me . He does alot small and big things . He would give me his last penny. He has been to three shops today to try and get a suitable card but no luck. He says hes annoyed Im pissed off . Ive said I'm not pissed off but I am upset that he hasnt got me a card. He says " but you know I dont do cards " I know for a fact he would be rightfully upset if I didnt get him a birthday card. So tell me strait AIBU When I say upset I dont mean crying and the like I just mean Ive gone quiet but not in an angry way. Oh and he has got me a present.

I haven't looked in on this forum for a few days and now I realise why

I would never send Christmas cards to family that I live with. It seems to me a ridiculous waste of money.

I have never ever written a Christmas card to anyone I lived in a house with. How very odd.

YABVU. Let it go. Really not worth arguing over something so trivial.

Give the guy a break!
Stop being unreasonable it’s just a card!

Extremely unreasonable and quite a childish reaction!