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Original poster

Panicking about my Christmas present piles

230 replies

Paddingtonjuice · 17/12/2020 23:37

Having last minute panic attack about my children’s presents after wrapping tonight. I have got almost everything from my children’s lists. 13 year old has a huge pile because they haven’t asked for any wow present just things like collectible figures he likes and computer games. I may have overcompensated actually because of the lack of wow present.

10 year old has asked for a gaming laptop. I have spent twice as much on them than the 13 year old but their pile looks shit. How can I give 13 year old a huge pile when 10 year old comes downstairs to a small pile? I’ve got a remote control car, a few Nintendo figures and some chocolate to add to the laptop. Could you do this? My mum says no. My Dh says yes as he has a great present.

OP posts:
Elsielouise13 · 19/12/2020 08:36

Crazy how people want to attack the OP.

We all want to make memories for our children and when mine where little I wanted to create memories of wonder.

As they have grown older they are more aware of value. But I still remember the year my family bought my brother a new bike and me a wooden school desk because I was the ‘academic’ one.

Not over it. I wanted a puppy.

Lovemusic33 · 19/12/2020 10:21

@Elsielouise13

Crazy how people want to attack the OP.

We all want to make memories for our children and when mine where little I wanted to create memories of wonder.

As they have grown older they are more aware of value. But I still remember the year my family bought my brother a new bike and me a wooden school desk because I was the ‘academic’ one.

Not over it. I wanted a puppy.

Im disappointed every year when I don't get a puppy 🤣

Every year I asked for a pony as a child and never got one. I don't have many memories of what presents I did actually get other than the evil looking bunny that cried real tears when you pressed its tummy (or head, can't remember).

Livandme · 19/12/2020 17:54

Prep your child.
One of my dc had a huge presents a joint birthday and Christmas gift. He got this gift for his birthday.
His pile is small and mainly useful things, undies, pj's, a game, sweets.

YoniAndGuy · 19/12/2020 17:57

Oh OP it sounds awful but I do know what you mean.

At 10, mine would have understood!

You could get a few funny little things for them to be opening things at the same time?

Iziz · 19/12/2020 17:57

I think they are old enough to know the value of their presents if you have spent almost the same on each child I think make this Christmas to make them aware of what they ask you to buy and how much it is my son is 8 from age five we told him you either get one big present with all it’s accessories or lots of small presents not expensive he loves lots of presents .

Nohomemadecandles · 19/12/2020 18:07

If you keep at it, though, it gets like cutting your own fringe - bit more that side, bit more the other to even it up and before you know it, you look Emma Watson.
I have to restrain myself and mix up the piles instead!

Hemelbelle · 19/12/2020 18:29

From my experience the more presents they have, the less they appreciate them.

petelacey · 19/12/2020 19:09

Sorry to hear about your piles. They're no fun even at Christmas.

PuddyMuddles4 · 19/12/2020 20:48

@MenoHiccup

Of course you can do this. The 10yo has to learn about quality V quantity. From about 10, at the latest 11, our dc learn that if they want a very expensive gift for birthday or Christmas, then they will have fewer gifts overall. It is something that we discuss from the first time they request an expensive item.
This. My girls are 12 and have known for years that 1 expensive present = a bigger pile of inexpensive presents.

I'm lucky though - all they want for Christmas are decent trainers.

Frazzledmum123 · 20/12/2020 00:24

I would just mention it to the kids beforehand, I've done the same with my ds 9, explained his gifts seem to be smaller but its just because of the things he is interested in. He was completely happy with this and when I said I'd been a bit worried he said 'but I always love what you get me'. I think we need to give kids a bit more credit really but I get why you worried

And PLEASE stop with the 'there are people who have lost their jobs' thing as a reason why we can't be upset about smaller things. It seriously pisses me off. My lovely dad has been given a terminal diagnosis this year so do I win over people who lost their job? Or does someone who actually lost someone already trump me so I shouldn't be upset? It is possible to be grateful for what you have and still worry about other stuff

Mamanyt · 20/12/2020 01:07

This is a wonderful time for the 10-year-old to learn that one expensive present is the equivalent of several cheaper ones. If he pouts, he pouts, and can be told to do so in his room...without his big, expensive gift.

CandleCove · 20/12/2020 01:14

A goady post if I ever did see one.

bobbiester · 20/12/2020 07:46

Christmas piles? A common problem when people eat so many chocolates and so much turkey during the holidays that their diet lacks fibre.

Grin
urkidding · 20/12/2020 08:49

Don't worry, the laptop will make him d forget everything else!!!!
They love you, not your presents! Have a lovely Chrismas!

Middersweekly · 20/12/2020 10:46

Don’t worry about the size of the pile. Your DS won’t even notice once he’s opened the laptop! He will be made up. We had a similar circumstance with our DD3 are she requested an expensive Pandora bracelet plus charms. It totaled almost 300€ so she didn’t get much else. She understood well enough and she was 12.

M4J4 · 20/12/2020 10:48

The spirit of Christmas has been lost. It's all about presents.

HitthatroadJack · 20/12/2020 11:19

@M4J4

The spirit of Christmas has been lost. It's all about presents.
You do know you can have both, and there's nothing LESS than the spirit of Christmas than being a grinch and resenting a few gifts for children delighted to open their presents?

I am an adult and I like my presents too!

As most people won't be able to see friends and family or do anything this Christmas, let's hope that at least kids get gifts to open. It's not WW3, no need to make everything more miserable than it needs to be.

(that's not a general comment, not especially a dig to the poster I am quoting!)

Jusu48 · 20/12/2020 11:20

Order something small and cheap from Amazon, in my experience it will come in an enormous box 🤪

Ideasplease322 · 20/12/2020 11:21

@GeorgiaGirl52

My grandson(18) got a book, an action figure, a sweatshirt, a package of socks and a Ford truck. My granddaughter(14) got two books, two bottles of cologne, a box of candy, three shirts, a gift box of snacks, two cds and an Amazon card. Should I rush out and get more junk from the Dollar Store to fill up the cab of the truck? If kids are so greedy that they think the number of presents is more important than the content, then they should get the number zero. (And yes, rude pedantic person, I know zero is not a number so don't bother showing off your knowledge. You know who you are!)
Why so angry? No need for this. It’s a conversation op not a yelling match.

If you don’t want to have a cage with OP the foxtrot Oscar 😊

Coronawireless · 20/12/2020 11:25

Get him a few things like erasers, slipper socks, mini-puzzles, cool snood etc. Cheap but fun to open and a nice memory. Ignore the Grinches OP!

Plunger · 20/12/2020 13:44

The children are old enough to understand that some items are small and expensive other bulky and cheaper. 10 year old should understand this. Was approximately the same amount spent on each?

RedskyAtnight · 20/12/2020 15:40

@Plunger

The children are old enough to understand that some items are small and expensive other bulky and cheaper. 10 year old should understand this. Was approximately the same amount spent on each?
No. The OP says I have spent twice as much on them than the 13 year old and on the basis that the big present is a gaming computer, that's £100s of difference. And yet OP is worried that one child has a bigger pile ...
Sorrynotsorry22 · 20/12/2020 21:18

Just wait until all they want fits in a shoe box !!

YouLookNiceJackie · 21/12/2020 10:39

A couple of years ago I heard my dp apologise to his ds (then 15) that it appeared that my ds (then 6) had more presents but my ds had had a lot of lower valued items. I felt shocked and angry that he was feeding this greed. His ds had got an annual pass for local theme parks as had my son which were £130 each so in my mind a main present. His ds also got £150 trainers, a bike frame to build his own bike, expensive tracksuit and a few other bits. Later on I heard his ds chatting to his mate and his mate said what did you get? And he replied some trainers and not a lot else 😡.
This year my ds is getting a laptop as doing a lot of online school work and zoom meetings. I'm already dreading the apologies and ungratefulness because dp will think his ds is hard done by with his £150 trainers, £150 tracksuit and other designer items which apparently won't look a lot next to my ds presents 🙄

Ideasplease322 · 21/12/2020 10:45

I suppose it depends how he went about it, but explains that he gifts are the same value, just different sizes surely isn’t that awful?

I spent the same on my two nephews, but the older boy got a single, expensive item while the younger boy got four larger boxes (lego).

I will quietly plain that to the older boy. It’s not an apology, it’s an explanation. He will be delighted with the present but at 11 might not really understand the value.