What things do you find rude that others don’t seem to?

[TheRaccoon]

I’ll go first:

• People who season food before they’ve tried it
• People who take ages to text back (or don’t at all)
• People who are late for no reason

Eating in the supermarket, while shopping. Have some self-control. It's vile whether it's adults or children (distract them with some actual conversation like a proper parent instead.)

Another introvert here: I find extroverts completely exhausting and generally speaking find they don't really want to hear what I have to say, they just want a stimulus to keep talking. I've got plenty to say, and plenty of opinions but if I think someone is not really paying attention, I'll shut up.

People who expect others to wait until everyone's food has arrived, even though their food is going cold.

People who expect other adults to remove their clean shoes at the door, as if they're small children.

People who have an opinion on how others season their own food.

People who say pardon, and insist on telling your child to say pardon instead of what, because they're unaware that actually, 'what' is the more polite word.

If you ever have social anxiety then you will know how hard it is and can take a long while to feel comfortable , people may of met a partner etc but different situations can be hard for someone
I think its harsh saying you think its rude that someone has social anxiety and in a group you will always have more vocal ones and ones less so

My DM showing me a gift for my DD - there were two items so she said “amd the other one is for you but I didn’t know which DGS would like better?”. HTF am I supposed to know, thanks for spoiling my present. I never get anything because DM has jo money and it’a fine but clearly I’m not worth any nice gesture. It would be nice to open a surprise gift because all yhe fmgifts under the tree will be bought by me.
Actually Dd has bought me something but of course I know what it is

[quote PandemicPalava]@CutToChase so many of you feel like this!

Just to present the introvert perspective, well mine at least, I don't always speak because I am crap in groups and can't work out when to interject, how to join in. The social awkwardness means I miss the gap in conversation and start to panic inside. I start to feel like I can't enjoy the conversation properly as I am concentrating so hard to listen while panicking and also trying to figure out how to join in. This usually ends in me frozen and wishing I wasn't there. I also feel more comfortable with people who don't talk so much so the gaps are bigger for me to attempt to speak in. Introverts a lot of the time don't know how to do small talk but I bet, get into a meaty honest conversation and you won't shut us up [/quote]
I don't feel like this. I'd suggest socialising with kind, non-judgmental people.

[quote PandemicPalava]@CutToChase so many of you feel like this!

Just to present the introvert perspective, well mine at least, I don't always speak because I am crap in groups and can't work out when to interject, how to join in. The social awkwardness means I miss the gap in conversation and start to panic inside. I start to feel like I can't enjoy the conversation properly as I am concentrating so hard to listen while panicking and also trying to figure out how to join in. This usually ends in me frozen and wishing I wasn't there. I also feel more comfortable with people who don't talk so much so the gaps are bigger for me to attempt to speak in. Introverts a lot of the time don't know how to do small talk but I bet, get into a meaty honest conversation and you won't shut us up [/quote]
Yes, my boyfriend is like that. I noticed that he likes a gap to think of what he wants to say. I used to think he wasn't going to respond at all Now I make my comment and wait without staring at him. Seems to work!

People who don't text back, say they are too busy but you know they have been in contact with others.
Not thanking someone for a card or gift.
Volunteering someone for something without asking said persons permission

People leaving their bags on the few available benches and chairs at the gym/pool - and then going off to swim or dry hair when there is limited space to sit down and plenty of lockers or cubby holes for bags but no - you have to use the seats!!!

@tectonicplates

People who don't bother learning how to spell or pronounce other people's names, and continue to get it wrong. Apparently for some people it just doesn't matter. So rude and disrespectful.

This is so rude. My name has two spellings and it really irritates me when people can see the correct spelling on my email or whatever and still persistently use the other one. Mine isn’t wrong or ‘alternative’, just one of two equally normal spellings.

People who walk into your house with their shoes on.

@ruthieness I put them in the floor if there's nowhere else to sit

People who moan about their life but don’t do anything to change things.

People who cancel plans last minute without a good reason.

People who “hate” a food even though they’ve never tried it (unless they can’t for medical or religious reasons).

Mums (and it is invariably mums) who dilly dally up the very narrow pavement to school at the pace of their toddler. If you've got a positively long line of other mums behind you who can't over take because the pavement is so narrow, then get your child by the hand and just walk faster! Does my head in!!

Accepting an invitation to a social event (e.g a birthday party or dinner party), then cancelling because you’ve had a “better offer”.

I feel particularly sorry for children who have no shows at their birthday parties, sometimes because their guests’ PARENTS offered to take them out somewhere else. What a shitty habit to pass on to your children.

@CutToChase

None of these are controversial in the slightest. I do actually have a controversial one:

Introverts who don't make an effort. I know I'll get slaughtered for saying it, but I do find it rude in social situations when people take a backseat and let others do the conversational heavylifting consistently.

I'm tired too. I think its inane too. You arent somehow more emotionally intelligent for remaining basically dumb throughout the entire evening, but you are rude because you're relying on other people putting in the effort to give the evening some semblance of meaning. Because if we all just sat there quietly well.... That would be awkward.

I do that when I dislike the company and were forced to be there. I just want to be left alone while I zone out and dream of being somewhere else.

When you are choosing something in a supermarket, and someone comes up very close and snatches something in front of you off the shelf

Oh, shelf blockers do my head in. Choose and move on or stand back so others can see. Even worse when it's a couple who go shopping together.

People who you have spoken to socially at a gathering (work/neighbours party) at some length who then do not even acknowledge you next time you walk past each other. Just the awkward, "Oh, hi!", smile, not expecting a conversation. And, no, I don't think I'm that boring they're deliberately trying to avoid me

@Cattenberg

Accepting an invitation to a social event (e.g a birthday party or dinner party), then cancelling because you’ve had a “better offer”.

I feel particularly sorry for children who have no shows at their birthday parties, sometimes because their guests’ PARENTS offered to take them out somewhere else. What a shitty habit to pass on to your children.

Whats wrong with parents spending tme with their kids? An invite is not a court summons and ots not rude to do something else.

@Bumbastic with respect then, you should go somewhere else. It can really drag the mood down when someone is there who's clearly miserable

Showing up uninvited
Forgetting that my phone is for my convenience and not yours
Not realizing when an invite states from 12 to 4pm that its time to leave at 4pm

People who expect others to find the information for them because they can’t be arsed to look themselves.
Why are you bothering me with work questions when you have access to the same information as me - look your bloody self! When they then say they’re looking after their work/life balance, I could happily string them up! What about my work/life balance?! And another thing, if you have managed to compose this text/post/email, then you are equally capable of googling it yourself. You do not need me to do it for you. Obviously, not talking about instances where I may have expert knowledge (arf!) or someone is asking for an opinion/advice. I’m talking straightforward fact finding.
Gosh, that was a rant. It clearly bothers me even more than I thought!

People who say pardon, and insist on telling your child to say pardon instead of what, because they're unaware that actually, 'what' is the more polite word.

If they're unaware, how could they do any differently? "What" sounds ruder than "pardon" (I know all the class arguments about the difference).

@CutToChase

None of these are controversial in the slightest. I do actually have a controversial one:

Introverts who don't make an effort. I know I'll get slaughtered for saying it, but I do find it rude in social situations when people take a backseat and let others do the conversational heavylifting consistently.

I'm tired too. I think its inane too. You arent somehow more emotionally intelligent for remaining basically dumb throughout the entire evening, but you are rude because you're relying on other people putting in the effort to give the evening some semblance of meaning. Because if we all just sat there quietly well.... That would be awkward.

The corollary is I can't stand people who witter on about the inanities of their life and think it's conversation! There must be a happy mid-ground somewhere.

Swearing - especially the F word - in every sentence. I cringe every time.

People who are early to your house

I find this the absolute height of rudeness. Even five minutes early - assume that the host is scurrying around doing the last minute finishing touches and wait in your bloody car. But no, you've arrived, you're early, therefore the occasion must start because you're here.

Drives me bloody nuts.

I actually believe - and many will find this controversial I admit - that the height of politeness when arriving at someone's house is 5 minutes late.