Manager of ceos wife... losing the will to live

[1sttimeonhere]

I am the wife of the ceo in a reasonable size company. After maternity leave I decided not to go back to work. My husband asked if I would help in the roll out of a small project in my area of expertise. not that I was super senior but I know enough to be really helpful.

My manager hates me.... he won't make any small talk with me at all, literally if I ask how his weekend was he comes back with a work question. He is late to meetings with me. Today he belittled me in front of a supplier.

I'm not a threat to him, he is definitely more qualified than me but his experience is different. He seems reasonably well respected- although I doubt people would tell me. Suppliers don't really like him because he can be rude. My husband has a reasonable relationship with him but some frustrations too.

I feel really upset and can't really do my job because he is so horrible.

It's nothing to do with jealousy, how does jealousy comes into it?

From OPs own words, there have been numerous issues that he has had to fix. In all likelihood, he doesn't find OP as competent as she thinks she is and feels frustrated because in normal circumstances, he could deal with it professionally but in this instance, he can't because he knows the big boss won't agree/support him and he needs good references for future work.

So he is bitting his tongue but sometimes his frustrations still come out. OP might only be one small element of his not agreeing with the way the business is ran.

If it was long term than talking to him as OP suggested would be the way forward but as this is due to end and he will be out of the way soon, what's the point?

As to say that OP is not paid, she will be getting dividends so she is getting something, and as they are saving in employing someone else, it is benefiting her financially.

Pretty unprofessional not to turn up to meetings. You can cancel and say you want updates by email instead, but don’t waste other people’s time

he can't because he knows the big boss won't agree/support him and he needs good references for future work.

The OP is ALSO his boss! That's what people are missing here. The misogyny on here is amazing. If he cared about his references for future work, he wouldn't be so rude to his boss.

Op I can’t believe people are telling you to deal with shitty behaviour just because you are the owners wife. Clearly the feminists are not out in force today. You are your own person not an extension of your husband and should be treated with respect same as everyone else.

4th January is not that far away so get the project done and then let him go, telling him that you don't appreciate his rudeness to staff and suppliers.

I'd pull him up on the meetings not being held. Is he organising and not turning up or are you? If you then ask him why he isn't turning up on time or contacting you via WhatsApp etc to say he is running late.

@dontdisturbmenow Maybe because she doesn’t have to work, has a husband who’s a CEO, part owns a business? I don’t know but some some of the responses here are strange and quite frankly misogynistic.
Also why are you making the assumption that the manager is in the right here? From what OP has said she’s filling in because she has the skills to do it and isn’t taking a wage, you know, she’s doing this to support her business. The manager is acting like a brat and she needs to pull him up on his unprofessional conduct. Not turning up for pre-arranged meetings, shows that he’s treating her with disdain. He’s being extremely foolish because as a contractor I’m guessing that he’ll
need a good reference come 4th January.