Deleted Thread

[whatatease]

AIBU to get so annoyed when I've invested weeks/months in a thread with genuine concern for the poster only to go back for an update and the thread has been deleted?

What happened with the kid who was given sugar at nursery?
The mum to be who wanted to go to uni when baby was 2-3 weeks old?
The husband who was spending lots of time with a female co worker, working away?

When I'm reading a thread and offering advice I need to know the outcome 😂
I want to know if you left your husband, if your husbands crazy ex got arrested or what happened when you confronted your cheating partner 🤦🏼‍♀️

Don't tease me like this!!

@BigBadVoodooHat

OP (and everyone else who hankers for 'updates'): you do realise that the vast majority of the dramatic, heart-strings-tugging, interest-piquing, outrageous CF, family drama, and otherwise 'exciting' threads are utter fabrications, don't you? And that's why they get deleted ( despite vague or euphemistic deletion messages such as 'looking behind the scenes' or 'we have some concerns').

Yeah this. ^ And also the tale of a woman (usually 30-ish to 45 or so,) who is single, and thinks her married, handsome boss fancies her, because there are 'sparks between them', and 'sexual tension...' Utter bull!

@PutThemInTheIronMaiden

I miss muddy puddles.

@Meepmeeep is right. rainypuddles (not muddypuddles) posted a catalogue of fiction. She gave herself away when she accidentally posted under another username.

most of the threads mentioned on here a made up threads imo

Sadly you don't really get to put conditions on it - it's just an online forum! If someone needs a thread deleting for whatever reason then that is their perogative.

I always read 'Hope you are ok OP' when they have disappeared for a bit as a 'come on OP I want to know what's happening'. The OP is probably pondering the next bit of the fictional tale.

@Vivarium

Yes, I get frustrated by the ones where the OP manages to get MNHQto delete the thread based on it being "too identifying."

Bollocks was it identifying. You were just getting your arse handed to you (with good reason) and you didn't like it.

If you're worried about being identified, then change your username. Or change some of the non-relevant details. Or don't post in the first place - that is actually a genuine option as well.

Blimey. What a nice place this is!

cologne:

Yes this has happened to me too. But MN just say things like "we're checking behind the scenes". How can they even do that. Do they start phoning people up and asking them why they posted and if they're a troll? I know they can use IP addresses to find previously banned posters, but even so,, it always sounds a bit strange.
..
I think MNHQ email the person concerned with a question and sometimes they say that they have heard from whoever, at other times they just put the thread back.

I'm highly suspicious of any poster going through highly traumatic and life changing events, who is, nevertheless, still able to post lengthy articulate updates on Mumsnet.

I agree. The Relationships board is notorious for dramatic threads that turn out to be pure fiction.

@CounsellorTroi

I would have liked to know how the family war dispute about the lottery scratchcard win resolved itself.

Yes! Christmas is here...can’t wait until that scenario is repeated again.

Note to self - If you are giving away family scratch cards always make sure everyone knows the rules.

I remember the Barbour coat threads from a year or so ago - they were ridiculous with posters demanding updates.

It wasn’t even interesting!

@jessstan1

cologne: Yes this has happened to me too. But MN just say things like "we're checking behind the scenes". How can they even do that. Do they start phoning people up and asking them why they posted and if they're a troll? I know they can use IP addresses to find previously banned posters, but even so,, it always sounds a bit strange. .. I think MNHQ email the person concerned with a question and sometimes they say that they have heard from whoever, at other times they just put the thread back.

Some are just really blatant about it though. You notice when they have a name-change fail. Under one username they're a dad who is asking advice about how much maintenance to pay, and under the next they're a grandmother asking why their DIL won't let them see the baby.

I posted on a thread yesterday which was rather sad. OP was tired and fed up looking after a baby whilst on mat leave. She made the mistake of asking in AIBU. (AIBU to tell you about my exhausting routine)

It was just hundreds of posts out-mumming each other. She was drowning and yet the pile on continued.

It was deleted for being derailed. It just struck me as so unnecessary for posters to come on and call her names (for essentially struggling!)

Trolls, trolls, everywhere! But, please don't call them out - always report to hq. You can follow threads without posting if you want to be super anonymous.

There are known trolls / pervs on here, which are usually removed quickly, but be very wary of the "oh! A weird lump / rash / colour has appeared on my (or even worse) / my children's genitals. Please tell me about yours." not envy.

I didn’t see that thread cheese, it’s a shame but inevitable. Someone will always have had it worse on mn - and be keen to tell you all about it!

On the other hand sometimes those threads can become a bit unhealthy so I’m not sure really. There were a spate of ‘I hate being a parent’ posts which could have been genuine but I strongly suspect were started by childless people with an agenda, to be honest. Sad when you start thinking like that in a way.

Stuff like this really lets MN down.

Whoa! This is sarcasm right?

I get the hankering for updates and closure. I do get curious myself but not invested enough to matter either way.

Do you seriously mean stuff like not getting updates from OPs or MNHQ deleting a thread because it's either a troll or someone asked for their thread to be deleted therefore not providing closure for readers lets MN down?

If you're serious, I'd suggest what a pp has written and try a box set or something. You may be taking this place way too seriously.

I caught the follow up thread to the raffle computer thread. The OP phoned them, the wife was shocked and handed it to the bil (or the other way around) he said then when they got it home it was an old computer with leads missing and they assumed the OP wouldn't want it. Deleted quickly so didn't see much further

I don’t understand why they are deleted if they are fiction - could they not just get moved to a ‘creative writing’ thread?

@Lockheart
If you want closure and updates then you need to pick up a book or watch a box set. Mumsnet is probably not the medium for you. OPs are not under any obligation to come back and update just to keep the rubberneckers happy, and posts can be deleted at any time.

Boooooo!

Maybe a box set or...

My thread about could confronting a school bully , ( who at 18 had assaulted a disabled 11 year old, referred to me as a "disabled c* and had driven one of my close friends to a near suicide attempt), was deleted as Mumsnet wanted to protect the identity of the bully, (I'd confronted him via facebook, and one poster had looked up his open, public profile). I didnt receive any email at all from mnhq to say why Io Thad been taken down, just a note on the thread saying they were concerned thebully might be outed, ( as his public Facebook profile still lists him as supporting the now defunct BNP, I'm assuming he's not actually all that worried about beingouted as a nasty piece of work).

I wasn't trolling , and the thread wasn't deleted cos of trilling accusations, but because Mumsnet wanted to protect the identity of a disableist , Ra IST cunt. I found that rather disgusting really.

I'm new to mn but I would love an update on the recent thread about the lady who's husband has a secret online emotional relationship with a famous lady he grew up with.

Ooh I remember the iPhone one. And also bizarrely the Tesco delivery one where the delivery appeared to have gone to a neighbour late at night and the OP was asking what to do. Never saw an update to the hundreds of comments!

A lot of them are deleted because they're total bollocks (repeat pbps)

Some because it just got nasty all round.

Some because the op didn't like the replies so suddenly 'realised' that posting on a very visible public website made them identifiable.

Some genuinely were identified.

Some were probably scared to update because they hadn't done what posters had told them to do and they knew what the responses would be

And some probably just dealt with it, moved on and didn't even think about updating MN. 😁

@Sootyandsweep2019

My thread about could confronting a school bully , ( who at 18 had assaulted a disabled 11 year old, referred to me as a "disabled c* and had driven one of my close friends to a near suicide attempt), was deleted as Mumsnet wanted to protect the identity of the bully, (I'd confronted him via facebook, and one poster had looked up his open, public profile). I didnt receive any email at all from mnhq to say why Io Thad been taken down, just a note on the thread saying they were concerned thebully might be outed, ( as his public Facebook profile still lists him as supporting the now defunct BNP, I'm assuming he's not actually all that worried about beingouted as a nasty piece of work).

I wasn't trolling , and the thread wasn't deleted cos of trilling accusations, but because Mumsnet wanted to protect the identity of a disableist , Ra IST cunt. I found that rather disgusting really.

It's always the bully who gets the protection.

I naively believed all the threads when I first joined but my eyes were opened when many were deleted saying things like 'previously banned poster' etc.

I seem to have swung the other way since then , am very cynical and don't believe a lot of them !