Cleaner put photo on facebook

[PortToTheLeft]

My cleaner has a facebook page where photos of cleans she has done are often posted - clean ovens, hoovered carpets, clear showerscreens etc. All fine.

She did my house today and I've just seen she put a thing on facebook of pulling a load of hair out of my shower drain with a comment to tell people to remember to clean their shower drains weekly.

I get this is grim but:
a) this is NOT a job I would expect her to have to do - it is definitely something I usually do.
b) I am under a lot of pressure just now and not 100% well. One symptom of this is that my hair is literally falling out. I have a shower and it comes out in clumps. I have bald patches all over my head. This is really really upsetting me. It does mean my shower drain needs cleared more often (every couple of days). I just happen not to have done it today.

I try to be as considerate as possible - I always tidy before she comes, I ensure the toilets are presentable etc.

The FB video doesn't identify me, but she must know I'll see it as our contact is always by FB messenger so I feel this is basically a way of telling me how grim I am. I am also already pretty emotional about the hair loss anyway.

So AIBU?
YABU: I am a disgusting person and should apologise to her.
YANBU: Not acceptable, if she had an issue she should not clean it, or say something to me.

I'm not sure what to do next either - regardless of whether I am unreasonable or not, I will not feel comfortable with her in my house feeling that any grimness of mine will end up on facebook.

@GlowingOrb

She shouldn’t be posting pictures from your home without your permission.

Absolutely that. It's apalling, and I wold have strong words with any cleaner who did that.

She basically told people that you don't look after your house. Even if she was posting my pristine carpets without asking, I'd be annoyed. It's my home, not her publicity material.

The OP’s privacy has been violated by someone whose service she hires

It hasn’t. You’d be right if it had been identified but it hasn’t. It could be anyone’s drain.

I used to work as a cleaner and did this job every week. I never expected my clients to do it as that was what you were paying me for.

Regarding the photos I would just ask her to not post pictures of your home without your prior permission.

A good cleaner sees all and says nothing.

I hope you feel better soon.

I'm sorry you're losing your hair like this & fir what's causing it.

I'd have cried at that too.

Clue - your cleaner is supposed to make you happy cry, not upset cry.

I'd text her & tell her to remove the video of my bathroom & not to come back.

@ShagMeRiggins

Give over, it's a shower drain hole

Nah, Worral. I understand your (mocking—cheers for that) point, but it isn’t just a shower drain hole.

It is the OP’s home—recognisable or not isn’t the point—and it has been photographed and posted to the world social media.

If this had occurred in a public place (people who park like shite), it might be different. If the person taking the photograph had not been hired by the OP for a service (arsehole nephew, for example, mocking his aunt), it might be different.

The OP’s privacy has been violated by someone whose service she hires. And there are laws about that.

It is not a breach of GDPR

If the logic is that the drain was unidentifiable, are you happy for your dentist to photograph your teeth and post them on their business page without your explicit consent? What about a before-and-after of your next bikini wax? If you can’t be identified, of course.

I would sack her! Just as I would be sacked taking photos in work.

Find another cleaner. I can’t believe anyone would be so insensitive and unprofessional. As you say, she would have known you would see her comments. This behaviour would upset me regardless of any health issues. Just nasty.

I’m sorry OP and hope you get well soon.

What she did is completely unacceptable regardless of your health condition. I'd be furious if my cleaner posted photos of our mess online.

I'd tell her it's unacceptable, and possibly add that she may wish to know you have a condition that causes hair loss so this has been particularly upsetting for you. Then either tell her you expect her work in your home to remain private, or that you no longer require her to come back (depending on what you want the outcome to be).

@EmilySpinach

If the logic is that the drain was unidentifiable, are you happy for your dentist to photograph your teeth and post them on their business page without your explicit consent? What about a before-and-after of your next bikini wax? If you can’t be identified, of course.

Of course not. Your body’s a completely different thing. Any part of my house that looks like the same part of everybody’s house? Fill your boots.

I'd be annoyed a photo was posted but then I don't like photos of my house on facebook full stop. I'd find it very invasive and I'd ask for her to take it down.

It is unprofessional of her. I suspect that she was not accusing you of being grim. She just fancies herself as as a social media star, a la Mrs Hunch, so wanted to give people a top tip. The good news is that, at least she had to dig around quite deep to unearth something that needed a bit of a clean. It's not as though she took photos akin to 'Home Clean is Your Home' and posted them for all to see. It was thoughtless and patronising, but hardly condemning you as a dirty mare! I would word a polite response such as 'i saw the photo of my hair in the drain on your FB site today. I just wanted to say that I do clean it routinely, but at present am shedding a huge amount of hair due to a rather personal medical condition. I'm a bit embarrassed about it, so if you could remove the photo, I would much appreciate it thanks'.

It is not a breach of GDPR

It is the propery owner's right to decide whether photos are taken on their premises. From the street - free for all. From inside the house - privacy is to be expected.

This is not respectful imo and I wouldn't have this person back in my home. It shouldn't need to be said that your home is private. I've worked as a cleaner and would never do this.

It's just plain rude. This is not how you should treat clients.

If she provides a better than average service, maybe give her a chance to remove the post and apologise, but otherwise you should get another cleaner.

She’s a cleaner, isn’t it her job to deal with hair in the drain? That’s just part of the whole cleaning process, ffs.

She’s extremely rude and unprofessional posting photos like that, I’d think twice about having her back.

I use quite few pictures of the houses I go into. All anonymous. Never a comment about the inhabitants, always about the house istelf, a light fitting, black spot mould etc etc

You are providing a service, and maybe your customers don't care about the photos on face book. However, it might be a better business model to reflect the wishes of the 92% of people who, according to the survey above, do care.

I've never cleaned my drain (disclaimer: I do have a cleaner so I'm assuming she must do it otherwise my shower would be more of a stand up bath surely?)

YANBU OP

were you aware she was putting photos on social media and did you ok it for photos within your property. If you did then not much you can do however if you never consented then you can certainly do something legal about it.

I don't feel its a personal attack on you rather an opportunity arose that she could remind people to clean an area often forgotten about otherwise it can lead to problems. I do get that you are rather sensitive over your hair loss and possibly that is part of the reason you feel attacked by this.

You sound a bit sensitive. Understandably its upset you however i would expect the cleaner is purely using it as advertising and promoting her business rather than trying to shame you or make you feel like you have a dirty home.

Understandably its upset you however i would expect the cleaner is purely using it as advertising and promoting her business rather than trying to shame you or make you feel like you have a dirty home.

Generally its best to promote your business in a way that doesn't make your existing clients feel uncomfortable.

I’d sack her,get the non- consensual photos removed. If she’s agency,complain and they can sack her, if she’s self employed sack her yourself for gross misconduct

If my cleaner posted any photos of my house on social media without my permission, she wouldn't come back. Even a mould spot.

I would message the cleaner

Thank you for cleaning the house today, I have felt really low these last few weeks and having a clean house is really lovely. I am losing my hair in large clumps - which in itself is really upsetting, & would Im sure for anyone to have large bald patches. Whats made this worse is seeing your post about my plug hole filled with hair. Can you be more sensitive next time you write a post on facebook and think why the plug hole may be filled with hair.

I think she’s probably just posting to promote her business & it’s absolutely not intended to shame! Though she should have checked before posting pics of your home.

YANBU and I usually eye roll at some MNetters who post about their cleaners for all sorts of ludicrous reasons.