Cleaner put photo on facebook

[PortToTheLeft]

My cleaner has a facebook page where photos of cleans she has done are often posted - clean ovens, hoovered carpets, clear showerscreens etc. All fine.

She did my house today and I've just seen she put a thing on facebook of pulling a load of hair out of my shower drain with a comment to tell people to remember to clean their shower drains weekly.

I get this is grim but:
a) this is NOT a job I would expect her to have to do - it is definitely something I usually do.
b) I am under a lot of pressure just now and not 100% well. One symptom of this is that my hair is literally falling out. I have a shower and it comes out in clumps. I have bald patches all over my head. This is really really upsetting me. It does mean my shower drain needs cleared more often (every couple of days). I just happen not to have done it today.

I try to be as considerate as possible - I always tidy before she comes, I ensure the toilets are presentable etc.

The FB video doesn't identify me, but she must know I'll see it as our contact is always by FB messenger so I feel this is basically a way of telling me how grim I am. I am also already pretty emotional about the hair loss anyway.

So AIBU?
YABU: I am a disgusting person and should apologise to her.
YANBU: Not acceptable, if she had an issue she should not clean it, or say something to me.

I'm not sure what to do next either - regardless of whether I am unreasonable or not, I will not feel comfortable with her in my house feeling that any grimness of mine will end up on facebook.

Bloody hell she’s got some nerve! That’s awful - does she really think you wouldn’t be upset by her posting that on social media without your consent!

Oh FGS. She didn't identify you nor did she say anything to embarrass you. So what's your problem? She's done you a favour.

Your illness is irrelevant. I don't have an illness and my hair still falls out all the time, most people's do and it will eventually clog a shower. I rarely unblock it as I forget but my partner does regularly (he's more of a cleaner than I am tbh).

You're offended. Now get over it. Stop making excuses and either let her clean the plug hole or do it yourself 🙄

@ReetDortyLass

Does anybody honestly think this would drum up business though?

The thought of having my house illustrated on her FB page would have me making a note of her number with the words DO NOT CALL THIS, right by it. She might as well call her business, Iwillshameyou.com

Being active on facebook does drum up business. I don't understand the iwillshameyou.com? Nobody knows whose house it is, if your house didn't need cleaning you wouldn't be hiring a cleaner? If you don't feel shame having someone else cleaning your mess I don't know why you would feel shame having that same person post anonymous photos of the same mess.

She shouldn’t be posting pictures from your home without your permission.

Am so sorry for whatever your illness (from someone struggling too at the mo) I would be really upset if that happened to me. She shouldn't be 'shaming' her clients on social media which is exactly what it implies. Maybe she doesn't think that herself but its not right and needs removing. I also would consider another cleaner. I used to house clean and some of the things I found were gross but that was my job and I just did it and was well paid for it. Take care xxx

@justanotherneighinparadise

Actually this reminds me of a scenario many years ago where we were renting a house and with no notice they sent a handyman round while DP and I were at work to fix an issue with the bathroom. When I got home I found a strange man in the house who reprimanded me for leaving my hair in the bath abs that he’d had to deal with it!!

I can remember standing on the stairs feeling very embarrassed about a scenario that had fuck all to do with this complete stranger who I hadn’t invited into the house! I’d shaved my legs in the bath, let the bath water go and hadn’t gone back in there as it ran out to rinse it down. Shoot me.

Reminds me of when an electrician came round to fix tumble dryer - I was in the lounge with little DS and he stood there and said “TV on then” and shook his bloody head before going off to look at the dryer. It was CBeebies and he managed to make me feel like a slack mum in my own house!

I dont think she was implying you are dirty. Sounds like she is promoting her services. Cant see a issue.

I would sack her. Totally unprofessional.

Just fire her and tell her why - as long as you don't mind her knowing. That's beyond unreasonable and instant dismissal material IMO.

@YoniAndGuy

I would be unemotional about it but address it.

'Could you remove the drain post please. As you might not realise, I'm unwell at the moment and hair loss is one symptom, so I'd rather not have a reminder of that on facebook. It might also be more relevant to use a post featuring a drain you actually do unblock regularly - as far as I'm aware this is the first time you have had to do this at ours as it's usually something I tackle myself. Many thanks'

I think this is perfect.

I would honestly fire her. She’s not being paid to film your home and make it public. Cheeky cow. And there is no reason you shouldn’t expect her to do this job unless it was specifically agreed that she wouldn’t.

I'm really pissed off on your behalf, OP. Hope you are feeling better soon, and tell your cleaner to fuck right off from me. That's a gross invasion of privacy and really insensitive and unprofessional.

I'm with previous posters, I very much doubt she meant to shame you or embarrass you; I'm sure her intentions were very straightforward, but I think it's completely unacceptable for a cleaner to put photos, whether before or after, on a Facebook site without having permission (in writing, with specific conditions) from employers to do so.

Also am baffled by why a cleaner would expect clients to do the cleaning. Isn't that why you would hire someone to do it?

Sack her immediately. If she asks why, tell her you found it humiliating that she has degraded you in this way, especially given the fact that it's happening because you are ill.

Hugely unprofessional, I’d be finding a new cleaner. She didn’t have permission to post photos of your home and it sounds as though she was shaming you which just isn’t right.

I’m losing huge clumps of hair atm too so our drains are similar. It’s not disgusting, it’s just hair...

@PortToTheLeft - I don’t think you are at all unreasonable to be upset by this. I don’t think your cleaner meant to upset you, but she has, and I think you would be completely justified in contacting her, telling her what you told us in your OP, and ask her to remove it.

I do understand cleaners wanting to promote their business by posting photos of their work, but I would not be happy if my cleaners did this without asking me first.

I would fire a cleaner immediately, if she does ask why tell her you don't like your attitude and don't appreciate her sharing photos online without your consent

She’s just getting content for her Facebook page. Get a grip

If she’s meant to be doing your cleaning then she’s just advertised that she’s not been doing a terribly good job .

I’m sorry about your hair loss OP and hope your health improves

Sorry but that is appalling, what a horrible thing to do. I'd have a conversation with her and probably sack her as the trust is broken.

I don't understand how you would automatically expect her to realise that's it's not her job to do that. She presumably knows you're unwell and thought she was doing you a favour.

However, I don't think she should have posted a photo so I haven't voted either way. Thoughtless of her to do that but the posters saying you should sack her are OTP.

OTT !

I run a business that has a very active FB page.
I ask for permission to post pictures, if people don't give it, I don't post and I am not offended in any way.

I would sack her.

She shouldn't be sharing pictures of other peoples houses.