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Original poster

Not to buy gift for rude godson! Who wld u blame

795 replies

Highfivemum · 07/12/2020 08:46

It was my Godson birthday two weeks ago. I bought him a lovely jacket from Next. It was the type I see him wear. I bought him age 11 as even though he isn’t a big child for his age Next in my mind is small fitting and rather bigger than smaller. I ordered online and then wrapped and messaged his mum to say his gift was their porch. I didn’t hear anything. Then this morning I received a card from him. It said “ thank you for the present that didn’t Fit ! I am 10 not 11 OK!!!!!! “
That was it. I was shocked to be honest. Must have read the card over and over again.
His mum has not said anything to me. I could have exchanged it.
His mum must have sent the card though surely. ?? whether she knew wot was written I don’t know.
I have said to my DH I am not buying a Christmas gift. DH said he is a child and not to get wound up. WWYD?

OP posts:
AaronPurr · 07/12/2020 09:36

@Highfivemum

Shocked ...Just got a text from his DM. She knew he sent the note and what it said. She said he was being over dramatic as the jacket is slightly large but fine but he doesn’t like it as it isn’t Nike !!
Just when you think it can't get any worse. 😮

OP please don't send any more presents to this rude, ungrateful family.

NoPointInWednesdays · 07/12/2020 09:37

What a cheeky little shit!!! I’m sorry, all those of you thats said “ he’s a child give him some slack, you take the high ground you are the adult “ blah blah blah absolutely no way on this gods earth would I buy him anything again!

10 is more than old enough to be polite or if you have nothing nice to say then don’t say anything at all there is absolutely no excuse for a child of that age to 1. Be so bloody cheeky and get away with it and 2. Not know fine well that it’s rude to say that! I would have never dreamed of saying anything like that to anyone that bought me a gift at the age of 6 never mind 10! And I was never ever smacked or hit as a child but was just brought up with basic manners no excuse for this type of behaviour from him at all! But I think what also makes it worse, I can bet that his mother knows fine well what was in that card and she thought it was fine to send! Says a lot about her as well TBH Hmm

ArtichokeAardvark · 07/12/2020 09:38

I can't believe the response from his mother - that's appalling. I would post them the receipt to exchange the jacket with a note saying that you are sorry he didn't like the present and you won't bother in future.

MaxNormal · 07/12/2020 09:38

Well now you know where his lack of manners comes from.

I'm amazed at all the peope excusing this. Ten year olds aren't perfect but they certainly won't learn to be more polite if they're not guided appropriately.

TreestumpsAndTrampolines · 07/12/2020 09:38

I'm trying to read the note in a jokey way, but I can't - without wanting to sound flippant, there would need to be a couple of smiley faces at least.

I can't read it any other way than entitled. I think cards is the way forward from now on, if you feel you want to mark the occasions at least.

MillieVanilla · 07/12/2020 09:38

He would be getting sweet fa from me ever again
I would be checking what my DC's had written at that age and that would not have been delivered to whoever bought a gift. In fact they would've been in for it being so rude.

LittleMissLockdown · 07/12/2020 09:39

@Highfivemum

Shocked ...Just got a text from his DM. She knew he sent the note and what it said. She said he was being over dramatic as the jacket is slightly large but fine but he doesn’t like it as it isn’t Nike !!
Shock she knew what it said and still let him semd it!! That's beyond unreasonable. What sort of parent does that? Shock
LetItGoToRuin · 07/12/2020 09:39

Picking clothes for someone else is high risk - I'd have sent a gift receipt with the present.

However, after receiving first the card from the lad and then the text from the mother, I'd definitely be striking them off the present list!

LabradorGalore · 07/12/2020 09:39

what a horribly rude child. Save your money OP, neither him nor his mother deserve any more of your kindness

krustykittens · 07/12/2020 09:39

TBH, OP, I would drop the lot of them. They don't seem interested in maintaining a relationship with you and don't care that their child is rude to you. I am also shocked at people saying he is 'only' 10 and doesn't understand. He bloody well does unless he has never been taught manners! Take the jacket back, get a refund and spend it on yourself. N point in forcing a relationship with people who don't care and they wouldn't be getting a penny out of me on gifts!

ProudAuntie76 · 07/12/2020 09:40

To offer an alternative view I understand that people often size up for babies but I don’t think you should have sized up for a 10 year old - it’s like saying ‘here is a lovey jacket YOU CAN’T WEAR’. A year is a long time for a 10 year old to wait before he can wear it. His mum may also not have offered to exchange it for him or wanted to ask you for fear of being rude. In which case he may have been sorely disappointed.

There’s no reason he had to wait a whole year Hmm. Next sizes are notoriously small. Between 10 and 11 the vast majority of kids go through massive growth spurts. A jacket in a 10 from a supplier that’s sizes run small was never going to fit him for long.

And he didn’t like it because he wanted a Nike jacket.

Bumpsadaisie · 07/12/2020 09:40

It was rude and you should mention it to his mum in a kind of "BTW thought I ought to just let you know that Harry sent me this card ...to be honest thought it rather rude and thought you would like to know" kind of way and leave it there.

If he is a bit socially immature, its possible he thought he was being amusing in a kind of "cool" way - my son is 9 and can sometimes be a bit inappropriate to us when he thinks he is making a smart joke. He has to be told that actually he is being rude and silly. Eg I made a lovely roast dinner yesterday and he sauntered in and said "hey mum this dinner is TRASH" mimicking what he hears on videos and in the playground. Of course he got a rollicking from DH and told to consider mum's feelings ... after which he ended up sobbing he felt so guilty ... he just can't think very well at this age!

If the mum didn't know she will probably come back with apologies and take it up with him and ask him to write a new letter or apologise - good learning experience for him. If she just gets very defensive or ignores, then you know where the problem lies.

Either way, don't take it out on a ten year old - he is ten and allowed to make mistakes and to know that adults can tolerate those. I'd send him an xmas gift as normal.

Viviennemary · 07/12/2020 09:40

I might excuse the ten year old but not the mother. Don't send any more presents.

Keyperfect · 07/12/2020 09:40

Well the apple doesn't fall far from the tree, does it!

Appalling lack of manners from the boy and his mum. Don't bother in future! I always size up, lots of shops not very generous with sizes and after all, children do grow.

Cavagirl · 07/12/2020 09:41

Wow!
Send money to charity on his behalf every year from now on, with a little card to let him know Grin

soschreibfaul · 07/12/2020 09:41

It sounds like it's the mother who needs to learn manners.

I think a lot of people would be shocked at how little some parents teach their children and how ignorant they can be.

Dozycuntlaters · 07/12/2020 09:41

On first appearances it looks rude but......10 year olds are very factual and maybe he is not aware of pronounciation.

Maybe he just meant to say

Thanks for the jacket
It didn't fit
1'm 10 not 11

He's saying thanks but stating a fact and maybe he thinks it doesn't fit because you got the age wrong.

VettiyaIruken · 07/12/2020 09:41

Wow.
No wonder he's so rude if he as at least one parent who thinks that's an acceptable 'thank you'.

YADNBU to decide no more gifts. They're barely in your life and aren't interested in being and they're rude as hell. Fuck them!

Dobbyismyfavourite · 07/12/2020 09:42

Unbelievably rude he's 10 not 5. Interesting that you don't normally receive a thank you from the child. If I didn't get a suitable response from the Mum at the most it would be a selection box and £5 in a card for Christmas.

Personally I would be mortified if this was my child. Also do parents not check their childs thank you notes before sending?

myneighboursarerude · 07/12/2020 09:42

Call his mum, if you’re close enough to buy him an expensive jacket you’re close enough to tell her how rude her son has been.

What an awful way for him to behave. Is he normally rude?

lottiegarbanzo · 07/12/2020 09:43

OK, well than I'd say he's welcome to send it back to you, or pass it on to a charity shop so that someone who will appreciate it can have it.

Then contact your ExH and let him know that maintaining this relationship is up to him alone now.

You could send cards only, in future, if you want to take the high ground and maintain some sort of link.

Monkeypeas · 07/12/2020 09:43

@Highfivemum

Shocked ...Just got a text from his DM. She knew he sent the note and what it said. She said he was being over dramatic as the jacket is slightly large but fine but he doesn’t like it as it isn’t Nike !!
I’d reply and say he can return it if he likes and spend the money on something else then never buy him anything again.

Both of them are rude and ungrateful

myneighboursarerude · 07/12/2020 09:43

If she is a normal person I doubt she checked what he wrote and he sealed the envelope thinking how funny he was. She’ll be horrified.

Mummyratbag · 07/12/2020 09:43

Apple hasn't fallen far from the tree. Agree with others - send receipt and not bother again.

Fluffybutter · 07/12/2020 09:44

Whoa! Apple doesn’t fall far from the tree.
Ask that ungrateful bitch to send it back and get a refund .
Then forget about them and definitely don’t send any presents in the future .
I’d be fuming.

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