My sister said I was "greedy" aibu to think I'm not?

[somethinginyoureyes]

I always help my sister out,every time we are out I will buy our Costa /Starbucks.
I lend her money and hardly get it back or when I do it will be short £20.
I know she's my sister but it does get annoying.
Anyway Monday she asked me to order her a phone cover off eBay,I did it was £7.99 and she said today when we go shopping she would get my Costa (a cup of tea and a cake ) it would have came to around £4.50.
So anyway we walk into shopping centre and she takes out £4.00 and says "I'm gonna use my cash in Costa instead of bank card"
I say "oh right I don't think £4.00 will cover it tho"
She says "I'm only getting a coffee,don't fancy a cake"
So I think I had a puzzled look on my face and say "oh right I don't have any change and don't want to use my card either"
She said "well your gonna have to if you want anything"
I said "I thought you were getting them for the £8 you owed.
She says "are you joking?,I only have £4.00 change,I don't want to use my card..fine il use my card !!"
I said "it doesn't matter,il get my own"
We go in Costa and she orders a coffee and then screams at me "what do you want"
I said "il get my own"
She said "well you made a song and dance over it,you have your bank card,why won't you just buy your own,instead of making me use mine"
I said "look I'm not arguing over £8 in future we will just get our own to save this"
She hands me a cup of tea (no cake ) and calls me a greedy cow and walks off.
Aibu to think I wasn't in the wrong?

You are not greedy. Your sister is a cf. How old is she? She sounds childish.
Anyway I would not be buying things on her behalf if she wasn’t going to pay me back. Would be different if she is struggling to buy food, but coffees, phone cases etc - not so much.

@Svelteinmydreams she's 33 I'm 35

No not at all. She's taking advantage.

Are you both 8?

Def not unreasonable OP - she sounds tight as arseholes (only know cos my sister is the same!!)

She sounds about 12!

So have you learnt the lesson then?

Oh I've learnt the lesson alright.
Normally I would have just bought them but I was sick of it.
I'm gonna start looking after number 1 from now on.

@Cautionsharpblade you could have easily stopped reading,believe it or not it's not compulsory

Wow, OP. What a horrible experience. Is she normally like this?

Don't lend her money again.

I would be sending her a super bitchy text laying out how greedy she is, how you pay for her every time you go out, how you lend her money and she's always short when she pays it back and then she has the cheek to call you greedy, after using you for money for years. And then I wouldn't be speaking to her until she changed her tune.

@MyGazeboisLeaking not really just because normally we walk in the coffee shop and I get my card out and ask what she wants.

Do these two things:

1. Stop buying things for her unless she's paid the money into your account

1. Don't buy her coffee or whatever when you go out. She's an adult and if she can't take turns then she should buy her own.

@Cautionsharpblade

I just wouldn't lend her any more money or buy her any more things. And tell her why not.

@Cautionsharpblade

Can’t believe I wasted my eyes reading this shit

Blimey - your eyes must be almost worn out by 99.9% of MN posts then, @Cautionsharpblade - perhaps you should de-register to avoid further injury

Time to stop letting her take advantage.
She got cross because she knows she's a cf.

It's obvious she is taking the kids and it's not you being greedy, I don't think you need to ask that.

I wouldn't buy things on her behalf anymore, there is no reason she cannot buy off eBay herself. I also wouldn't lend any more money unless it truly is a emergency and I would stick to each paying for your own things when out.

Never a lender not a borrower be. Money always ends up causing problems between people.

What an unpleasant sister she sounds. I would be inclined to simply say 'I think we should stick to paying for our own stuff after your little performance the other day, thanks'. YADNBU

No need to be “bitchy.” If she asks again for something, just say no.

If she asks why simply say “I generally don’t get it back and it’s not my role to fund you. Love you, though.”

Stop enabling your sister to act like a spoilt brat @somethinginyoureyes

Just stop !

just because normally we walk in the coffee shop and I get my card out and ask what she wants.

Gosh, Mumsnet brings out latent victim-blaming tendencies in me, which never surface in real life. But nowhere else do I encounter so many people who just do not help themselves - at all.

You’ve no-one to blame but yourself. But I’m glad you’ve (finally) learnt the lesson.

My sister is a little bit the same in that if she's owes you something it can take days or weeks to get the money back and she may argue over the actual amount. If we also do reciprocal purchases then she will try and reduce the cost of what I want when she is paying even if the last purchase I made for her was more than what I now want. I've started insisting she either buys her own if we're in a situation where it wouldn't cause any extra hassle (eg individual coffees rather than sharing a cream tea). If it's a shared item I will pay her the money before she buys, mobile banking and PayPal are great for quick payments. I don't deal in cash a lot and even less so since Corona Virus so very rarely have cash to pay up front. I just don't let her owe me money anymore, saves the hassle of having to chase it up.