Taking pets to other peoples homes

[Satsuma2019]

Hey, so we are currently trying to make Xmas plans and have decided to host Xmas dinner at our house (within the permitted COVID rules). One family member has a dog... AIBU to say this family member is not to bring their pet when attending.

We don’t have pets and the dogs are known to wee and poo on the floor at a whim. Plus our house isn’t overly big and I just feel that there won’t be a lot of space for my DC to play with their new toys and we are going to have to constantly watch the dog all day to ensure they dont chew on the toys or wee on the floor. Just seems very stressful ...

[quote Cosmos45]@VodselForDinner - I do so wish I could implement that rule here too! It does make me laugh that my dog is not allowed at any of my husband's families houses but all their children can traipse over our house.[/quote]
You need to put your foot down.

It’s seriously one of the best things I ever did.

Of course you're within your rights to not invite their pet and it's certainly not comparable to a child

I didn’t make a comparison between pets and kids, though.

I merely pointed out that I don’t allow children into my house. There are a few things I don’t allow in my house: children, smoking, door-to-door sellers. Generally anything that will be noisy, smelly, damage my floors, or are likely to cost me money.

My friends and family know my rules so either it’s an adult-only visit, we meet somewhere else, or they host or they put the kids into kennels for the night

It works really well.

^BarryWhiteIsMyBrother
Because if you don't like children they are as much of a pain as dogs are to non-dog people.^

This is stupid on so many levels. When you are old, other peoples children will have become the adults who fund your pension, the doctors who treat you in hospital, the police who keep you safe, the carers who keep you well in your home.

We need lots of people to have children, whether you like children or not. As they grow up to become useful to society. We do not need anyone to own pet dogs.

Comparing children to pet dogs is terrifically stupid.

Vodsel

I wonder how you would feel if all those children you ban from your life grow up to be people who refuse to care about you as you age.

@VodselForDinner You do realise that you were once a child? Or did you change species once you turned 18?

People have kids because they want them not because they are concerned about the elderly and therefore procreate. And whether kids are needed or not, that doesn't mean I have to like them or have them in my home.

So yes, kids to non kid people are as much of a pain as dogs are to non dog people. 100%.

[quote Mittens030869]@VodselForDinner You do realise that you were once a child? Or did you change species once you turned 18?[/quote]
I’ll be a corpse some day too, but don’t fancy having one of those on my couch.

@NoIDontWatchLoveIsland

This is stupid on so many levels. When you are old, other peoples children will have become the adults who fund your pension, the doctors who treat you in hospital, the police who keep you safe, the carers who keep you well in your home.

Lol. Or can dogs do that instead? Oh dear, your dog will only live for 15 years at most.

Sorry, but why post such child hating tripe on a forum for parents?

Barry white

Why people have them is neither here nor there. The point is we must welcome or at least tolerate them because childhood is a temporary state and they become adults all too swiftly. Pet dogs on the other hand, are pointless & unnecessary.

@NoIDontWatchLoveIsland

Vodsel

I wonder how you would feel if all those children you ban from your life grow up to be people who refuse to care about you as you age.

I haven’t banned any children from my life, just my house. Literally love to see them, but just in a different setting.

I also don’t establish relationships with friends in the hopes that their children will care about me as I grow old. It’s not the role of my friends to birth my future pals.

I also don’t establish relationships with friends in the hopes that their children will care about me as I grow old. It’s not the role of my friends to birth my future pals.

No but you are assuming they will birth your future doctors, farmers, carers, refuse collectors, plumbers, and all the other adults our society needs.

Really interesting how defensive some people on here are getting.

No visiting dogs in the house = your rules hun.

No visiting children in the house = you will die alone with nobody to wipe your arse.

Incidentally, I don’t allow dogs in my house either. That doesn’t make me a dog hater. Not allowing children in my house doesn’t make me a child hater. I like dogs, I like kids, I just prefer them away from my breakables.

@NoIDontWatchLoveIsland

I also don’t establish relationships with friends in the hopes that their children will care about me as I grow old. It’s not the role of my friends to birth my future pals.

No but you are assuming they will birth your future doctors, farmers, carers, refuse collectors, plumbers, and all the other adults our society needs.

If you have children, did you do it because you want to give birth to someone who’ll work in a nursing home and take care of your aging peers some day?

I have a small, well behaved, toilet trained, non-shedding dog that doesn’t beg, lick peoples face or chew property and I still wouldn’t randomly expect people to accept him in to their home. I am always appreciative if they do offer and would gratefully accept knowing he would behave. On the flip side, as a responsible owner I would put his needs before our jolly up. If I couldn’t take him or find appropriate doggy care then I wouldn’t be going.

Childhood may be a temporary state but certainly one I do not want imposed on me in my home. Just like you wouldn't want dogs in yours.

And just to reiterate - we don't take our dogs to other people's homes, nor would we expect anyone to welcome them just because we decided to have them. And we expect the same from people with kids. Very, very simple.

YABU in your attitude towards dogs and their owners.

But YANBU in not wanting the dog in your house. Your house, your choice.

I have dogs, I don’t expect to take them when visiting others and don’t expect my guests to bring their pets with them without invitation or asking permission.

I have a mostly dog-friendly immediate and extended family, but we would never assume our dogs were invited to Christmas or any other family party. (Well, when our last two dogs were young puppies, we brought each of them over to a get-together just long enough so that everyone who cared could see the puppy, but we stayed out of the house, and it was a very brief visit each time.)

It's not unreasonable to not want another person's dog in your house, but if they have to travel far and don't want to leave their dog behind, there's always the possibility that they'll say they can't come without the dog.

I’m another of the dogs but no kids brigade. I’ll happily allow people to bring there pets (a close friend has a ferret) but I’m not too happy with small children. I’ll allow the ‘children’ in my family but that’s because they’re now 15 and 13.

All my group of friends have dogs and none of them have children. It’s a perfectly valid life choice and I’m sick of being judged for it. If I can’t find a suitable arrangement for my dog then I’m declining the invitation and I understand people with kids who do the same.

Oh and I’ll be paying BUPA to wipe my arse when I’m old. I find it horrid when people say they had kids so they have somebody to look after them when they’re old!

@Foxyloxxy7 Yes we all gravitate to like-minded people. My friends are mostly parents or grandparents (I'm an older mum). The difference is that I also like animals. I have 3 cats and my DSis has a dog and 2 cats, and other friends have pets.

I wouldn't have a problem with having a dog come to our home if it wasn't for my cats and my DH's allergy. (I don't want to own a dog, though, because I don't want the commitment.)

It's possible to like both children and pets.

Pet dogs on the other hand, are pointless & unnecessary

Totally necessary in this house. Ours has saved our sanity for the last nine months.

Well it’s up to you who you have in your house but equally expect them to turn down your invite. I wouldn’t want a random stranger in my house on Christmas Day to look after my dog. I wouldn’t leave her alone for more than 3-4 hours.

Luckily everyone in our family has dogs and wouldn’t dream of asking us to leave ours at home.

Oh and yes to some people dogs are necessary, ours helps my son with his anxiety and helped me through extremely dark days of ptsd.

It's your house so your rules. My dog wouldn't pee on your floor or be a nuisance though! My sister has often brought her dog to my house in the past but again, he's a well behaved dog. I certainly wouldn't have an untrained dog as a guest!