To think he's BU or am I?

[rispettare]

Namechanged for obvious reasons

A few hours ago DH found out his nephew had attempted suicide and he was in hospital. They aren't close but he was upset and he lost his twin brother (nephews dad) to suicide 9 years ago. DH said why couldn't he have spoken to someone and DS (21) said that he told him he was struggling but told DS not to tell anyone anyway husband shouted at him calling him stupid etc and punched him and then he had ago at DD(11) when she told him to leave DS alone. DS is now blaming himself.

I told DH he shouldn't have hit DS or shouted at him as it isn't his fault but he thinks I'm bu because DS should've told someone

Who is bu here?

@PrincessNutNut

You have no idea whether the son could have saved his cousin. His sister did tell someone and it didn't help. If the cousin asked him not to say anything, he might have felt guilty if he had done and thought the cousin took his own life over that.

Suicide is not a neat thing that's always preventable and it's actually really quite a wicked thing to attempt to lay it on this young man's shoulders. A really, really wicked thing. And his abusive father should be the last person to be lecturing him on how to preserve mental health and help vulnerable people.

Yet you have not responded to the many posters suggesting DH is at the root of the suicide /suicide attempts.

Why?

Oh gosh just read your replies. Your son needs to report your husband and you need to stick up for the poor boy. He will end up with poor mental health himself. Wouldn't have a man that punched my child in the house whether it was my husband or not.

@rispettare

So DH apologised to DS when he got back with DD. Anyway I was just upstairs and DD ran upstairs and I asked what happened and DS said that DD accidentally spilt her drink and husband shouted at her telling her to be more careful and DS said it was an accident and husband shouted at him saying he's been doing his head in as soon as he got back ( husband told son to fill up the dogs waterbowl and ds said he would in a minute then he called him lazy and said looks like Ill have to do it then). and dd thought husband was going to his DS

I said to husband I know he's upset but he shouldn't take it out on DC's and he said of course I'm on their side and has gone to walk the dog

So DD thought your DH was going to hit DS again!!

Sounds like your DH is spoiling for it, and it wont be long until he does it again. No doubt your DS and DD think the same.

What are you going to do about it?

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