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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

What the hell happened to me on my 40th?

186 replies

Didthatreallyhappen · 28/11/2020 21:30

I've name changed for this as it is embarrassing and outing. On my 40th I went out to a music event with some friends. It was one of the first nights out after having ds2 who was about 2 at that point.

During the night I realised I didn't know my friends as well as I thought. They were super friendly and revved up. Halfway through, one of my friends started sharing some blue ground up powder which she said was MDMA. She was just dabbing it on her gums. I have never taken class a drugs in my life, though I did experiment with cannabis quite a few times in my early 20s.

Anyway. I did one dab on my gums. I did feel a bit of an effect so I didn't have anymore unlike my friends.

That evening I stayed away from home at my friend's house. I felt something odd like some neurons in my frontal cortex exploding. Since then it's awful but I haven't experienced the feeling of love and euphoria ever since. My sense of love of music and my sense of rhythm and dance vanished as did the natural high high I used to get from dancing. Awfully, my children no longer felt a part of me in my head and my heart, but rather almost like strangers (cute ones obviously) to me.i have forgotten a lot of previous cherished feelings. My connection with nature and my 6th sense got much weaker.

Has that micro dose of whatever it was ruinined me for ever? Am I imagining it all? Can I get those memories and feelings back? My friends seemed unaffected.
I realise it was stupid to take that, not least at the ripe old age of 40.

OP posts:
Didthatreallyhappen · 28/11/2020 21:48

Anyone?

OP posts:
gildalilly · 28/11/2020 21:49

How long ago was this?

Paddingtonthebear · 28/11/2020 21:50

Umm. When was this?

Didthatreallyhappen · 28/11/2020 21:50

3 1/2 years ago.

OP posts:
ContraIndicated · 28/11/2020 21:50

How recently did this happen? One dab of MDMA is very unlikely to have caused this. Have you had depression before?

ReceptacleForTheRespectable · 28/11/2020 21:51

Your 6th sense? Hmm What's that when it's at home?

Isadora2007 · 28/11/2020 21:51

It doesn’t sound like a typical effect of mdma which should really do the reverse. Could you have developed depression?

Didthatreallyhappen · 28/11/2020 21:51

I've never had depression. But would it come on suddenly like that? Like literally overnight?

OP posts:
Womencanlift · 28/11/2020 21:52

Don’t quite get your problem. Are you saying that since then you haven’t felt anything towards your children or you just didnt that night?

If just that night I guess it was just an effect of the drug (I have never taken anything so have no idea what it feels to be high). If you are still feeling it now then you need to get some sort of medical help

user1825894133270 · 28/11/2020 21:53

I felt something odd like some neurons in my frontal cortex exploding.

Crikey, that's very specific.

How long ago was this?

Didthatreallyhappen · 28/11/2020 21:53

@ReceptacleForTheRespectable

(great name).

Your 6th sense? hmm What's that when it's at home

I used to have gut instincts about stuff. That's all gone.

OP posts:
Isadora2007 · 28/11/2020 21:56

It sounds very odd indeed and I wonder how much is psychosomatic as you describe fairly dramatic feeling changes which are rather subjective rather than objective. Did you feel guilty going out and reconnecting with a side of you you’re in denial about? Or do you feel Guilty for doing something against your better judgements and now you’re punishing yourself in some unconscious way? If it’s been going on for a long time now (assuming this happened pre covid) maybe a trip to the GP wouldn’t hurt.
What do YOU think would help?

LolaLollypop · 28/11/2020 21:57

MDMA isn’t blue and you wouldn’t dab it on your gums. Also a tiny dab of something wouldn’t have an effect so severe as what you’re describing. I’d blame your change in emotions on something else rather than that night. Perhaps your anxiety about taking drugs that night kick started how you’re feeling now - but it wouldn’t have been the drugs actually chemically changing anything.
What you’re describing sounds like depression/anxiety - feelings of detachment etc, unable to enjoy life’s pleasures etc.

Ladywinesalot · 28/11/2020 21:58

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Thereluctantstepmother · 28/11/2020 21:59

Sounds like depression op.
In was quite low level depressed throughout my DD’s early years.
You’ll get back to you, it’s just all consuming.

Ohalrightthen · 28/11/2020 22:00

Did it not occur to you at any point in the past 3 years to go and see a doctor about the fact that since taking an unknown substance you can no longer feel love?

Didthatreallyhappen · 28/11/2020 22:00

@LolaLollypop what? Why on earth do you think I'm a troll?

OP posts:
Didthatreallyhappen · 28/11/2020 22:02

Did it not occur to you at any point in the past 3 years to go and see a doctor about the fact that since taking an unknown substance you can no longer feel love?

I'm not sure what the doctor could actually do. As far as I'm aware the doctor is not advanced enough to give a pill that reinstates feelings and emotions.

OP posts:
ContraIndicated · 28/11/2020 22:02

A single dab of MDMA 3.5 years ago has not caused you to stop feeling association with your children. You need to go to the GP to talk about your mental health.

Didthatreallyhappen · 28/11/2020 22:03

Sounds like depression op.
In was quite low level depressed throughout my DD’s early years.
You’ll get back to you, it’s just all consuming

Perhaps. But I don't recognise it as depression. And it literally happened overnight. Perhaps it's very high functioning depression I don't know.

OP posts:
ContraIndicated · 28/11/2020 22:03

What do you imagine anti depressants do?

Paddingtonthebear · 28/11/2020 22:03

I would definitely speak to a GP about how you are feeling

Gunpowder · 28/11/2020 22:04

I’ve never taken MDMA but I remember friends who did having an energy and mood crash a day or two afterwards. Do you think this could be what happened to you and you somehow convinced yourself it was permanent? Maybe it coincided with a period of depression? I’d go and see your GP about it too.

lunar1 · 28/11/2020 22:04

Could you have banged your head that night?

DragonMamma · 28/11/2020 22:05

MDMA isn’t blue for a start and in my long (colourful) history I haven’t heard of such a personality change like this after taking one drug (whatever it is), once.

There must be something else going on.