AIBU about his kidd xmas day?

[MyWitzEnd]

DH has two kids aged 21 and 18. This year they are coming to is supposedly for xmas. DH has just told me that his DD wants them to come on the 23rd and go home on the 25th. This would mean i would be in my own for nearly three hours xmas day as he does the round trip. I had bo choice other than to agree and now feel mean at feeling cross.

I can't see the problem at all. What's difficult about spending 3 hours alone on Christmas Day? I can understand why your DH would want to enable them to spend part of the day with their DM. Just juggle the timings of things to fit in.

OP, I don't think YANBU at all. I'm guessing this is more about the fact that you weren't consulted or given any say in this decision than about the 3 hours themselves - at any rate, that's how I would feel.

This brings back memories of the way my DH's ex (and my DH, unfortunately) behaved when my DSD was small, and the way I would find decisions sprung on me with no one bothering to ask for my opinion or input because it supposedly 'didn't make any difference to me.' It wasn't so much the details of whatever arrangement had been made, as the lack of consultation, and the feeling of having no say, that got to me. Maybe those who've posted nasty sarcastic responses have never been in that position.

Would you not have a pile of chocolates you could tuck into?

I'd be made up if my husband cleared off for 3 hours after Christmas dinner. Peace and quiet with custody of the cheeseboard. Bliss.

Total none issue

Needy, much?

Mostly on Christmas Day I'd give my right arm for 3 hrs all by myself. Sorry if you don't feel the same but you could relax and have the TV controller to yourself. We had 16 here last Christmas, I was so sorry we didn't have a dog anymore as I'd have had a good excuse to escape for a while.

I think you are being unreasonable.
While some people like to stay in and not budge on Christmas day others have a lot of people they want to see and have to split the day.

If they don't have their own transport then i'm sure their dad won't mind driving them as that means he gets to see them for part of the day which will mean a lot to him.
Why make it into a big thing?
At that age each year could be the last year that they spend part of the day with you because they might head off travelling or have boyfriends the following year and spend the day with them or his family!

You could chill or nap or phone people who you want to wish a happy Christmas too if you're in the house on your own for 3 hours....or why not go on the drive with him and maybe on the way back find a nice local beauty spot up in that area and get a nice Christmas photo with your partner or just sit and breathe and make a nice memory.

I dont think the OP will be returning to this thread 🤣

The special christmas rules apply from the 23rd to the 27th. So as a pp said, they’re having 2.5 days with their dad and 2.5 days with their mum. No it’s pretty inconvenient that christmas day is the halfway point, and not ideal, but most people’s christmases will be far from ideal this year. I don’t really understand all the ‘but it’s christmas day’ handwringing tbh, there’s the rest of the holiday to spend glued to your dh’s side if that’s what floats your boat.

Sounds amazing and I don't even have kids

what even because of covid and they have been advised not to use public transport? OK

even I can spot this is a young journo though

Yes... Even with Covid... Shock.

I don't see the point in seeing 'spending Christmas' with someone if a large part of the day is spent driving them home. And no, I wouldn't expect my parents to do that on Christmas day.

No no 'young journo' here thanks. Just someone with a different opinion to you. It's allowed.

I would adore 3 hours of "alone time". It would be my best Christmas present ever.

Having said that, if I was expected to spend them preparing a Christmas feast by myself, I'd make it clear to my DH that he'd be returning to a turkey microwave meal.

That means DH can’t have a drink on Xmas day, does he not drink?

I think it’s unreasonable to expect to be taken home on Xmas day if they are coming to yours for Xmas this year.

Can they not go home on the 26th. Pubs etc won’t be open on the night of the 25th so I can’t see why they need to go home that day, unless they are going home to spend half the day with their mum. Is she on her own?

In which case that’s different and maybe she could collect them or at least meet halfway.

lots of people spend the whole of Christmas on their own - I'm sure you can manage 3hrs!

Unless he is your carer and you need 24/7 assistance the you are being ridiculous. I'd love 3 hours to myself!

I think you're getting worked up unnecessarily. 3 hrs is nothing. Enjoy the peace and quiet, eat mince pies and watch some crappy Xmas film

I was being sarcastic, it was obviously lost on you

Fair enough, then, Patricia - it's quite hard to tell on this thread, though, with lots of people seemingly equating "I would like to be able to spend Christmas Day with my husband and for him not to be sat in a car all afternoon" with "I will die of neglect if I'm left alone for a few hours"

Lucky you, I'd love three hours peace on Christmas day to watch whatever I want on tv and eat tonnes of Christmas food!

3 bloody hours allone. Boohoo
Read a book.
Text some strangers
Run a bath
Eat some scones

You'll live op 😊

Yabvu .There are thousands of people alone this Christmas and you are shining about three hours.grow up!

Whining

@gobbynorthernbird

Unless you're about to tell us you'll have 3 day old triplets, a puppy, and his 97 year old grandma to look after for those 3 hours, YABVU.

🤣

3 hours on Xmas day alone? To eat food, watch a movie and have a nap? Sounds amazing to me. If you don’t want to be alone you could go with them but I don’t see the big deal. You are both grown ups.