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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU about his kidd xmas day?

383 replies

MyWitzEnd · 25/11/2020 20:57

DH has two kids aged 21 and 18. This year they are coming to is supposedly for xmas. DH has just told me that his DD wants them to come on the 23rd and go home on the 25th. This would mean i would be in my own for nearly three hours xmas day as he does the round trip. I had bo choice other than to agree and now feel mean at feeling cross.

OP posts:
Shoxfordian · 25/11/2020 21:18

Yabu
Can't you amuse yourself for 3 hours?

Youarenothere · 25/11/2020 21:19

Put them in a taxi

Possums4evr · 25/11/2020 21:20

Well he's not playing golf or cycling is he? He is doing something for one of his children. Not at all the same. And if it was the mil presumably OP would be invited too.
I would expect the time to be a reasonable one and fit in ok with dinner etc.

PinkFizz19 · 25/11/2020 21:20

I can see how it's not convenient but my DH had to work most of Christmas Day last year so 3 hours is nothing. I'd have a nice soak in the bath, pour yourself a glass of something and have some nice chocolates whilst watching a cheesy Christmas film xxx

Meepmeeep · 25/11/2020 21:21

3 whole hours? You poor thing. I would never ever normally say this but LTB.

Standrewsschool · 25/11/2020 21:21

I wouldn’t like it either.

SBTLove · 25/11/2020 21:23

Do neither drive? I’d suggest home in Boxing Day.
Is there a particular reason you want him glued to you? after visitors for a few days I’d be glad if the peace and quiet.

nanbread · 25/11/2020 21:24

Well I wouldn't mind 3 hours by myself on Christmas day, but I would mind driving for 3 hours... It's a bit of an ask

MorganKitten · 25/11/2020 21:27

They are his children of course they come first!

justconcedealready · 25/11/2020 21:27

Ride with them if you don't want to be on your own ... that way your DH will have company on the trip home, too?

SuperCaliFragalistic · 25/11/2020 21:28

You marry someone with kids (yes, even young adult kids) and you have to expect a certain amount of his time will be taken up by them. If he didn't want to drive them back he could say no but presumably he's happy to do it.

OwlBeThere · 25/11/2020 21:28

What time of day? Do you have children?

DuzzyFuck · 25/11/2020 21:28

Give yourself a shake OP. You're probably not BU to be a bit Hmmthat she's chosen to leave on Christmas Day and DH is taking her but things could be much worse.

Thousands of people spend every Christmas completely alone, and this year many thousands more will through not being able to travel and so on.

Perhaps you can spend your 3 hours getting involved in the #JoinIn hashtag on Twitter, there are lots of people there who'd be grateful to pass some time with a chat.

HollowTalk · 25/11/2020 21:29

They are old enough to be told no, that's not convenient. Either stay for the day or come another day. He's not a taxi driver.

FortunesFave · 25/11/2020 21:31

Are you under the age of 10? Is there some reason you can't be 'on your own' for three hours? Don't be ridiculous.

MonicaBelulaGellar · 25/11/2020 21:34

@ShowOfHands

Go with him? Read a book? Watch some telly? Eat trifle? Can't really see the problem
I second the trifle suggestion
QueenofLouisiana · 25/11/2020 21:38

Three hours on my own? On Christmas Day? Heavenly! A new Christmas book, a warm bath, glass of something lovely...

unicornparty · 25/11/2020 21:38

I'm with you op. Who wants to drive for 3 hours Xmas day? Do they not drive? I presume thats why your dh is driving 2 adults around.

OldAndWornOut · 25/11/2020 21:41

Surely that's the sort of thing families do, put themselves out for each other?
I think it's a bit strange, not wanting to be left.

dotoallasyouwouldbedoneby · 25/11/2020 21:43

YANBU. Is this to facilitate the 'adult children' also seeing their Mother on Xmas Day? I would have thought the one day to avoid travel is the 25th, so taking them back first thing on Boxing Day would be preferable. I think it will spoil the whole dynamic of Xmas Day especially if they plan to leave earlier rather than later in the day. Maybe have a discussion about why they want this and even why does he have to drive them? Taxi instead? Will everyone be alcohol free or just their father lol?

Ilove · 25/11/2020 21:44

I am very confused...they are not children..

dotoallasyouwouldbedoneby · 25/11/2020 21:44

@HollowTalk

They are old enough to be told no, that's not convenient. Either stay for the day or come another day. He's not a taxi driver.
This
Fruitsaladjelly · 25/11/2020 21:45

It would depend on what time this was, after Christmas dinner and the washing up is done, fine, you can snuggle up with a glass of something and hog the remote.

If this means him going out in the morning leaving you to slave over the meal or them all walking out after eating leaving you to clear up then yanbu

AnneLovesGilbert · 25/11/2020 21:45

@OwlBeThere

What time of day? Do you have children?
Why does it matter whether or not she has children?
TatianaBis · 25/11/2020 21:45

What?