To ask why children and teens have such bad mental health? (pre-pandemic)

[peepeelongstocking]

Surely there must be something massively wrong in society, but what is it? I’m inclined to think it’s social media (screens as a whole really), and a lack of prospects for the future (due to high house prices and lack of jobs). Surely there must be more to it though.

I know we’re diagnosing MH issues much more, but it’s rare that you’d find an older person who remembers feeling suicidal during their teen years for example. That seems to be more or less standard now.

I’d love to know what others think it is!

Social media
Social media
Social media

This, but also be sure to include YouTube, Tiktok etc in that - endless hours of watching people do stupid shit, endless over produced pop videos etc. Kids need to be helped to limit their internet and phone time and get outside and offline. The internet, 25 years ago a beautiful invention, is fast becoming a poison as the users have become the used. Unfettered capitalism/technology without ethics has the potential for massive harm.

@MessAllOver children don’t start formal schooling in Scotland until they are 5 or even 6. The English system of 4 is madness

I've not long turned 20 and have MH issues and I'd personally say it's not only social media (constantly comparing yourself to things that aren't real), but also the pressure I feel to complete the same milestones my parents did around my age even though it is a lot more difficult now even dating is difficult.
Things cost more and wages aren't increasing.
I'd also say the school system is tough, grading is hard, A levels are ridiculous and qualifications determine everything now. Social media also means we are constantly being exposed to hate and negativity and I think most of this generation are addicted to our phones which is sad..

[quote peepeelongstocking]@cruzin

Very interesting! Although I feel like (this might be completely wrong) the suicides that do occur are less the upper age brackets, and increasingly younger, which is the worrying thing.

@ComeOnBabyHauntMyBubble

I struggled v. seriously with MH issues as a child and teen and it wasn’t really something caused by a societal thing. I’m not suggesting it didn’t happen, it just feels like something has changed and made it more widespread?[/quote]
Out of curiosity, did you get support and help with it?
Did you talk about it?
Were you diagnosed?

This thread makes me sad, as a teen. We still have a way to go when it comes to understanding MH problems, it seems.

[quote peepeelongstocking]@cruzin

Very interesting! Although I feel like (this might be completely wrong) the suicides that do occur are less the upper age brackets, and increasingly younger, which is the worrying thing.

@ComeOnBabyHauntMyBubble

I struggled v. seriously with MH issues as a child and teen and it wasn’t really something caused by a societal thing. I’m not suggesting it didn’t happen, it just feels like something has changed and made it more widespread?[/quote]
Oh and btw, you feel wrong.
If i remember correctly it's age 45-59 in both males and females that have the highest rates. Ages 10-29 are much much lower and have been fairly constant throughout the years too.

@Sara2000

What a delightful thread to read for those of who have teens and children with mental health problems. Apparently I have bought my child up to be a snowflake, she has had too much screen time, shes not resilient , I have kept her too busy,not disciplined her enough, yada yada.

What a bunch of ilinformed, hard of thinking bunch of arse wipes you are. If you manage to get through your smug little lives without dealing with a child with mental health problems, good for you. I can tell you one thing, it won't be due to the empathetic and considerate example you have set.

Hear hear!

to you and all of us who have to parent children with mental health and neurodiversities.

should say mental health issues.

This is an interesting thread. It makes me very sad. My Ds's have been ok. But many of the ds's in their year aren't.

My first comment was me being facetious

• my real feelings are more in line with ComeOnBabyHauntMyBubble

DD's. Ie girls. Seem to be worst hit.

Attachment insecurity in early years.

@Sara2000

What a delightful thread to read for those of who have teens and children with mental health problems. Apparently I have bought my child up to be a snowflake, she has had too much screen time, shes not resilient , I have kept her too busy,not disciplined her enough, yada yada.

What a bunch of ilinformed, hard of thinking bunch of arse wipes you are. If you manage to get through your smug little lives without dealing with a child with mental health problems, good for you. I can tell you one thing, it won't be due to the empathetic and considerate example you have set.

I totally agree with you. It's utterly fucking shit.

Some people don't live in the real world at all. It's very easy to blame other people when you're fortunate enough to have mentally healthy children.

I agree with a pp who said that lack of independent play means that children don't get as much opportunity to build resilience and independence as they did in my day (I'm 65).

We used to just hang out doing not a lot, and were allowed to travel on public transport etc without an adult, played unsupervised in woods all day, go up to London with mates from the age of 12 and stuff like that.

It meant we learned to be independent and resourceful from an early age.

@Sara2000

What a delightful thread to read for those of who have teens and children with mental health problems. Apparently I have bought my child up to be a snowflake, she has had too much screen time, shes not resilient , I have kept her too busy,not disciplined her enough, yada yada.

What a bunch of ilinformed, hard of thinking bunch of arse wipes you are. If you manage to get through your smug little lives without dealing with a child with mental health problems, good for you. I can tell you one thing, it won't be due to the empathetic and considerate example you have set.

Hear hear!

Totally agree with you.

Too much helicopter parenting. Children do EVERYTHING with their parents and therefore do not learn how to make their own devious, take risks and problem solve. Leads to unconfident adults with no confidence in themselves and there our abilities and not able to deal with the ups and downs of normal life.

And Social Media. Terrible for mental health. When young and vulnerable getting constant messages of perfect people with perfect lives being the norm. And no space or escape from these messages or any bullying. Bullying at school can continue into the home much more easily. Constant use of SM and smartphones is the opposites of mindfulness. Very bad for mental health and developing brains.

I’m not sure I agree with this.

I am in my mid forties and was very depressed as a child/ teenager. As were my siblings due to home issues but also many many of my friends in school.

We hid it and were ashamed of it. If caught, self harming for instance, we were punished/ told off/ called attention seeking. There was no support. There was a large group of very unhappy children in my year group and in those of my siblings. I think that the children with issues cling together.

I had friends self harming, overdosing, drugs And alcohol, ocd, anxiety

This was a naice ‘middle class’ private school in the 1980s.

I am just being diagnosed with bipolar now in my mid forties.

So my anecdotal view is that it was always thus but that our social media And 24 society highlights it.

I wonder if it's because for thousands of years children played outside with their friends, had more autonomy over their lives because of it, and learnt self resilience. The last 20 years or so, kids have been indoors more, socialising less, and ultimately they are more lonely.

Am 21 now, but it was definitely the school system for me. Can’t say I was too concerned about the jobs market, just the next exam!

@Sara2000 That’s you presuming that pp do not have children with MH/ NDD issues.
I don’t think it’s a horrible thread at all it’s pp answering a question and a very relevant one at that.

What a delightful thread to read for those of who have teens and children
with mental health problems. Apparently I have bought my child up to be a snowflake, she has had too much screen time, shes not resilient , I have kept her too busy,not disciplined her enough, yada yada.

Posters aren't pointing the finger at individual parents, they are talking mostly about societal changes and technologies which have a massive effect on many teens. Yes, points have been made about some parenting issues, but that doesn't mean people are saying that all or even most parents of teens with mental health problems are failing to parent well. And obviously there are also plenty of teens who spend too much time on SM and have little discipline who will have no mh problems.

Actually, the only time I have felt properly depressed and empty was at around 11 when I was having an existential breakdown and coming to terms with the likely non-existence of God and the afterlife. So definitely not social media

I am neither smug nor ill informed thank you.