To ask why children and teens have such bad mental health? (pre-pandemic)

[peepeelongstocking]

Surely there must be something massively wrong in society, but what is it? I’m inclined to think it’s social media (screens as a whole really), and a lack of prospects for the future (due to high house prices and lack of jobs). Surely there must be more to it though.

I know we’re diagnosing MH issues much more, but it’s rare that you’d find an older person who remembers feeling suicidal during their teen years for example. That seems to be more or less standard now.

I’d love to know what others think it is!

Over-stimulation from birth.
To many extra-curricular activities, not enough "down time".
Too much technology, pressure to "compete", social media.
News and information 24/7. You cannot process all of this and most of it is gratuitous.
Enormous emphasis on appearance.
Never being allowed to "fail", so never learning to deal with disappointment. Inflated expectations - not everyone can be a brain surgeon, yet flooding the tertiary education sector with students has both devalued the system and raised people's expectations of what they are "worth".

The school system.

Not the teachers, before I get jumped on.

The system itself.

Too much of everything. Too much instant gratification, too much busyness, too much time being chivvied into things parents think are right and necessary, too much pressure, too much exposure to social media, too much exposure to technology and too many parents juggling the pressures of modern life. Too much emphasis on schools being the ones to teach everything, instead of the balance between school and home.

I honestly think there's untold pressure on our teens and young people that just didn't exist 30 years ago.

Not being taught self-control.
Not being taught coping skills.
Not being taught life skills which instills confidence and independence.
Not being properly disciplined.
Not being allowed to fail and face the consequences.

I wonder if not learning to self soothe as infants is part of it.

And I do agree it's a huge problem. Young people are amazing but there are real problems.

The news constantly being negative.

Everyone’s bringing up very interesting things that hadn’t even come to my mind!

FraughtwithGin I agree that the news is an especially significant one. I think that combined with an expectation on social media to do something in the face of big injustices (say, climate change) must be stressful, especially when there’s the knowledge they can’t do anything very meaningful anyway. It’s like there’s constantly a new thing that they must be worried about in order to prove to their peers they are a moral person.

Poverty,lack of security, chaotic home lives, poor attachment, poor management of disabilities and SEN , the school system as a whole,genetics.

Many ,many reasons.

I self harmed since 13. Technically no one knew,practically no one cared.

Look at all the adults that are relying on food,drugs,alcohol etc just to function now. Do you really think they were all happy children/teens?

Social media
Social media
Social media

Social media

Being peddled the idea of being wrong if they are different

Being told ADHD/Autism/anxiety/developmental co-ordination disorder/ Eating disorders and other mental health conditions and neurological differences are made up and a product of a snowflake generation

From my own experience as a parent of a child it's that and unfortunately as a child myself it was divorce and later, blended families.

This subject is addressed in 'the social dilemma' documentary

Pressured teach to the test education system.
Less freedom/ autonomy to socialise. Less opportunites to start working such as paper rounds.
More fragmented communities.
Social media/ gaming
Sedentary lives
Having to care about the latest big issue, environmentalism, gender politics, being seen to have the "right" beliefs and opinions.
Pressure on family time from work/ life balance.
Family relationships e.g. divorce. I don't think this is necessarily worse, more in the open.

As a teen...

The school system plays a huge role. From year 9 onwards we had it drilled into us that GCSEs are the be-all and end-all, that we should have revision timetables that we must stick to religiously, that as we near exam season the rest of our lives must go out of the window in favour of revision. Some GCSE students have eight or nine subjects to be studied in-depth, and we are told that our future depends on the outcome of those four intense weeks of grilling - no room for off-days. And it's even worse at A-Level, despite there only being three or four subjects!

Many of my friends also have unhealthy home lives. Whether it's caring for younger siblings, enduring intense pressure from competitive parents or other troubles, they are still expected to push all of that aside and give their all to their studies, every day.

Peer pressure is another problem, although that of course varies depending on who you associate with.

I could go on, and perhaps I will later. For now, better get back to revision

When I went to school - years ago- there was a lot of self harm. I remember plenty of nihilistic holistic drug use and dangerous driving. The peers I would have expected to went to prison or circled through drug use/shut jobs etc. My form had two boys who were dreadfully mentally unwell, several eating disorders and at least one self harmer. All these adults with issues started as children with problems.

Wealth inequality is proven to increase mental ill health and that is growing. Pressures from social media don’t help and the school system is enough to make anyone depressed.

I can’t imagine the lack of self soothing babies is relevant. Many cultures have babies who are not taught to self sooth and they don’t have higher rates of mental illness. Close care of babies is associated with better outcomes generally.

Improve wealth inequality, create an accessible curriculum in schools and reduce class sizes whilst increasing funding and non academic outcomes and I think children would be happier.

I agree with much of what PP have said. I think the main reasons anecdotally that I have come across and also from discussions with DC are, home/ family problems, lack of resilience and inability to cope with any failure or minor setback and excessive pressure from social media, peers, education and expectations of parents.

Capitalism.

All the people blaming social media, you do realise there are plenty of children under 8 that struggle with their mental health,anxiety,self harm etc.

What impact exactly social media has on them?

@Aquamarine1029

Not being taught self-control. Not being taught coping skills. Not being taught life skills which instills confidence and independence. Not being properly disciplined. Not being allowed to fail and face the consequences.

I think nails a lot of it. Particularly the bit about never being allowed to fail and learn from it, that is huge (I know this from experience).

Add in social media and just the general huge amount of information that young people have access to, including all the negative and depressing stuff, and it's a recipe for disaster really.

I don’t think they do, I think there’s an agenda to make us believe they do though.

People confuse ‘anything a child could feel sad or worried about’ with ‘depression and anxiety’.

Less booze, drugs and sex to take their mind off things.
People used to leave school and get useful jobs at 15.

I think it's a mixture of technology and kids being given too much choice these days........they just aren't equipped to cope.

Hell my friend refused a job and chance of finally earning a decent income that would finally bring stability because her dd kicked up such a fuss. Children should not be dictating to parents. They're unable to see the bigger picture. And I honestly think it has a negative impact on building good mental health and resilience. Involve them in planning and things they'd like to do to make things better and easier than them but FFS don't give them the deciding vote. It's too much pressure allowing children to make adult choices and it doesn't benefit them in the long term.

I just asked my teen DC and they said the majority of their peers that see school counsellors have issues that stem from their home life such as absent parents, waring parents, parents with MH or drug issues.

Here is the list of reasons why:

1. Social media