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Original poster

Working all Christmas

188 replies

Reallyneed · 15/11/2020 09:35

DH works nights in a warehouse/retail job.

This year Christmas eve, Christmas day and boxing day fall on days that he will be due to work.

Last Christmas he worked all through and it was miserable, me stuck at home on my own with two tiny toddlers watching daytime tv whilst he slept through the festivities.

This year we are due to have his three eldest (my step kids) over on boxing day for the whole day which just won't be able to happen if he's working then sleeping then back to work again.

Do we need to 'suck it up' or should he be entitled to spend the Xmas period with me and the children.

I was so looking forward to Xmas for once now I'm feeling disheartened.

OP posts:
Funkypolar · 15/11/2020 09:57

In the nicest possible way: as a military wife my husband could be away for 9 months at a time including over Christmas. At least yours comes home safely every day.

Original poster
Reallyneed · 15/11/2020 09:58

No annual leave this year no. He has put in multiple holiday request forms and each one has been rejected with no explanation as to why.

His boss is a bit of a git, to put it politely.

DH gets the distinct impression he doesn't like him and he's not the only one, the boss has 'favourites' and also people that he's particularly unpleasant to.

OP posts:
Glossyrocks · 15/11/2020 09:59

Seems savage, whenever I have worked shifts we have not worked all of the key days ie Xmas Eve, day and boxing day- we have had at least one off.

Original poster
Reallyneed · 15/11/2020 10:00

@Funkypolar

In the nicest possible way: as a military wife my husband could be away for 9 months at a time including over Christmas. At least yours comes home safely every day.
I accept that, I'm sorry to sound insensitive when there are clearly people who have it worse off.

My apologies to you and the other poster who works away.

OP posts:
cliffdiver · 15/11/2020 10:00

I would celebrate Christmas on a different day.

Glossyrocks · 15/11/2020 10:00

In the nicest possible way: as a military wife my husband could be away for 9 months at a time including over Christmas. At least yours comes home safely every day.

So? Literally no relevance to this whatsoever.

IceFrost · 15/11/2020 10:01

Has he ever asked why he wasn’t granted the time off?

IceFrost · 15/11/2020 10:02

@Funkypolar

In the nicest possible way: as a military wife my husband could be away for 9 months at a time including over Christmas. At least yours comes home safely every day.
This is completely irrelevant.
Lurchermom · 15/11/2020 10:03

@Reallyneed

No annual leave this year no. He has put in multiple holiday request forms and each one has been rejected with no explanation as to why.

His boss is a bit of a git, to put it politely.

DH gets the distinct impression he doesn't like him and he's not the only one, the boss has 'favourites' and also people that he's particularly unpleasant to.

He is entitled to the number of days of annual leave stated in his contract. The company has the right to deny days if they cannot rota for it, but an explanation should be given (as far as I know). What happens if he gets to the end of his holiday year and he hasn't taken his annual leave? I'd be speaking to HR.

Not about Christmas, unfortunately it's always tough to rota that and many places have holiday blocks in place over the Christmas period. But for the rest of the year I'd be wanting to know what my company planned to do about the annual leave I'd been denied.

Daydreamsinglorioustechnicolor · 15/11/2020 10:03

Is there any pay enhancement for the Christmas days worked?

LizaE · 15/11/2020 10:03

What are the 'favourites' shifts/holiday over Christmas?

SnuggyBuggy · 15/11/2020 10:03

Sounds like a brutal work pattern. I thought the advantage of doing 12 hour shifts was that you then get more days off consecutively. How many hours does he do a week?

Funkypolar · 15/11/2020 10:04

Glossyrocks - people have it far worse. Maybe as a military wife I’ve just had to learn to be more independent and just get on with things?

OP - my intention wasn’t to make you feel bad Smile Your situation is a bit sucky but there isn’t much you can do about it. Does DH have a few days off after Christmas where you can do something special to make up for it?

littleducks · 15/11/2020 10:05

Can he put in a leave request for a different set of days and you celebrate then? So more likely to be approved as less popular days? Maybe ask his manager in writing for "support" taking his accrued annual leave? He must need to take it at some point?

Tigger85 · 15/11/2020 10:06

The only Christmases I have had off in 12 years were because I was on maternity leave. Some places if your rostered that's tough, you can apply for annual leave and it's better to put the request in at least a year in advance. All our shifts are 12 hours long and tend to end up with forced overtime of atleast an extra hour so if your rostered and you have small children you won't see them at all. My work did try to get stations to self roster last year, but that meant asking people who had just worked the last 10 to give up one or more of the special days to allow people who just had the last 10 years off even more christmases or boxing days or new year's days off, there was also no guarantee that they would try self rostering in any future years or that if you swapped with someone that year they would return the favour in the future. After having my son I have gone part time and been put on relief so end up working every holiday and almost all weekends, if I was still on my rota I would be having my turn at having many Christmases off now. We will be telling our DS as he grows up that Santa has come abit early or a bit late as he knows mummy has to work and can't be home. He will still have a very low key Christmas with his dad with a few presents on the actual day. It's only ever the three of us so most of his Christmases will be just ds and dp. The children will view it as normal as it's how they will grow up, it will be sad for you and your dh though.

LaurieFairyCake · 15/11/2020 10:07

He HAS to be allowed to take holidays? Confused

Are you saying he has a whole years leave to take ???

When does his holiday year run out ?

Original poster
Reallyneed · 15/11/2020 10:07

@IceFrost

Has he ever asked why he wasn’t granted the time off?
Unfortunately not, due to the continual poor treatment from his boss he doesn't feel comfortable. He puts in the request form online (as is their policy) and when he checks back they are always rejected.

Personally I think he should have raised it, many times.

During a briefing a few months ago it was said that by September employees needed to have used %30 of their holidays.

DH has had one day of holidays all year and that was so he could be present with one of the children for a medical procedure.

Another colleague however, who works less hours than DH, always seems to be on holiday. I see it as no coincidence that this particular colleague is one of the bosses 'favourites'

OP posts:
DryRoastPeanut · 15/11/2020 10:08

Statutory holiday entitlement is the law. Put in a holiday form and tell boss you will be taking time off regardless of what he says.

IceFrost · 15/11/2020 10:08

He has to be allowed to take his holidays though.... when are they proposing he takes them all?

If it’s all online that they have all been rejected then he could speak to someone higher up.

ScrapThatThen · 15/11/2020 10:09

This does seem really unfair op, but as it is not changeable I would sort out with dh

  • one decent family celebration day with all five kids (doing Christmas early or late could be a fun family tradition). And a way they can do stockings and presents with dad there. Turn it round from annoying boss to 'dad's doing an essential job today so he can't have Christmas day off like other people can, so this is how we are going to have fun.'
  • as you have no family, husband or in laws to worry about pleasing, it sounds like you should plan the day exactly as it suits you (lots of TV and treats for the kids, easy delicious food for you and whatever you want on telly in the evening).
Original poster
Reallyneed · 15/11/2020 10:10

@LaurieFairyCake

He HAS to be allowed to take holidays? Confused

Are you saying he has a whole years leave to take ???

When does his holiday year run out ?

I will ask him when he gets up later.

To the best of my knowledge he has had just the one day of holiday this year.

It's a ongoing problem that causes alot of upset.

OP posts:
Pamelaaaaa · 15/11/2020 10:12

The Christmas thing is shit, but he's legally entitled to holiday. Not necessarily the days he wants but the statutory number of allowed days.

FourPlatinumRings · 15/11/2020 10:12

I get what you mean, OP. Yes, that's pretty shit. My sympathies.

LaurieFairyCake · 15/11/2020 10:13

If the leave year runs til January this could work to his advantage...

Leave form put in for 14th December to 1st January - if it's turned down raise a grievance

He has put forms in all year via the means they want, they've all been turned down so the grievance may find in his favour

I would literally just TAKE the holiday from 14th December onwards

Merryoldgoat · 15/11/2020 10:13

Is this a large company? Is there an HR department?