To find that “I’m an empath” actually means I’m a complete attention seeker

[Covidchameleon]

Ok I’m being bitchy. And grumpy. But have seen this twice today used by completely people to completely justify being a drama queen.

To be fair in general - I tend to find that anyone who self proclaims them self as any personality type then tends to proceed to be irritating.

Emos are still a thing!

@amusedtodeath1

I'm well past caring about what strangers on the interweb think of me. Like I said, I'm not so bad anymore and I don't doubt that some people use it as an excuse, but a lot don't. I couldn't handle my emotions because I was abused, I'm a different person now, but I still remember how awful it was to be a walking conductor for emotions. It's fucking horrendous to live like that, but I also get how annoying it can be if you don't understand why.

I realise you describe yourself as an empath, but think you are in a different category from most of the people who self diagnose themselves as such.

You’ve had very real challenges to deal with which have affected you emotionally.

The people being criticised on this thread are the ones who just want to be a bit wacky and different, but are really just like the rest of us. We’re all empathetic to some degree - just most people realise it’s a normal human attribute- not a superpower.

Ha! My brother has the opposite to this. He proclaims himself to be entirely rational and all his actions steeped only in logic. He’s intellectually above all this ‘feelings’ stuff, just ask him.

Except that he has such a hair-trigger for being mortally offended, that you can practically predict to the second when he’ll have a big strop and take his bat and ball home. Over monumental things like ‘which variant is this tomato plant?’ or ‘does Song A resemble Song B?’

It was pretty amusing when he was 6, significantly less so as he approaches 50.

Oh yes, he’s also ‘allergic to hypocrisy’ apparently.

There’s nothing quite as eye-rolling as what people write as the captions under their own mental pics of themselves, is there?

@Scarby9

'I have a horror of war'. Clearly everyone else loves it.

Or the ones who don’t ‘do’ funerals. Self absorbed wankers. Ditto hospital visits 🙄

Is describing yourself as an empath a new thing? I encountered it for the first time this week.

It's a load of bollocks. No Sam you aren't an empath, you're a twat.

@amusedtodeath1 a PP summed it up better than I did, but this isn’t about what you describe at all - am I am so glad to hear that you’re better now.

I’m referring to those who self describe themselves in a certain way, and then generally proceed to prove to be the opposite or use their self label to behave like an arse.

@Stripesnomore I think it’s fairly recent. I gather they described themselves as something else before.

I am what those memes would call an empath, am also most likely undiagnosed autistic and I would never proclaim it all over Facebook. I hate drawing attention to myself. I find it excruciating. Being highly empathetic is a curse, not something to show off about. It’s draining, worrisome, isolating. I can walk in a room and feel peoples moods. I know what people are thinking. I’m a perpetual fence sitter as I see everybody’s viewpoint. Even people I hate. It stinks

@lottiegarbanzo

The word is 'empathetic'. Nobody is 'an empath'. Empaths are from Star Trek.

Deanna Troi, who would intermittently gasp ‘I’m sensing deep anger’ when some hostile species was actually firing furiously on the Enterprise from five feet away.

Got to love these people bashing threads innit

“Empath” is a made up “thing” popularised by Star Trek. Those of you saying you are “empaths” are confirming the OP. You might be aware of feelings or spend time trying to understand motives but you’ve not got some special insight. If you think you do then you need to get your head out of your arse.

Cardswapping good call! I was coming on to say it just made me think of Deanna troi!

Yeah, utter wankbadger talk

Next!

@StormBaby can you explain what you mean though, I mean you’d have to be pretty dense not to sense that someone is upset/angry whatever and pretty thick skinned not to have a negative reaction to it. What makes this different? Genuine question - I don’t get it.

I thought an 'empath' was something to do with the occult.

I was about to say Deanna Troi, unless you're Betazoid you're not an empath. Plus her mother manages to prove the empath = raging narcissist point quite nicely.

Its nothing new though, there are adults in the William books who earnestly describe themselves as "feeling things terribly deeply". They also have to have frequent rests as the strain of bring so much more sensitive than everyone else is so frightfully wearing. The author clearly thought such types were dreadfully silly, perhaps she'd have been on MN starting threads about it had she been born eighty years later.

I know someone who calls herself an empath. She couldn't give a shit about other people's feelings. If anyone is going to let you down or stuff you around, it's her!

PS: Well, it used to mean something occult. Now apparently it means someone who has empathy:

"The term empath comes from empathy, which is the ability to understand the experiences and feelings of others outside of your own perspective."

I'm pushing 60 now and have learned over the years that when anyone tells you what they are like, you can pretty much guarantee they are the opposite.

I'm not convinced. I always describe myself as a sarcastic dickhead and there is quite a lot of objective data to support my hypothesis.

DonQuixote, that’s a good point.

I am a bit of an arsehole.

I've certainly met people who claim to be empaths and will tell you how difficult it is having to cope with other people's feelings. And yet those same people seemed to read my feelings really incorrectly. I hadn't the heart to point this out since they were already so overwhelmed with what they perceived others feelings to be. I don't know how often supposed empaths actually check in with other people to see if those feelings they perceive are actually accurate.

I'm pretty sure I am an empath and have felt this way for about a decade.

@Maria53 Could you explain what you mean? How can someone be an Empath in real life?

@Covidchameleon what would you call 'a negative reaction'?

DonQuixote, that’s a good point.

That's because I'm dead self-aware, me.