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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be annoyed at people shopping in families/couples?

875 replies

Nicknamegoeshere · 08/11/2020 16:37

So I went to the supermarket to do my weekly shop today. Left the baby and my OH at home as I understand the current rules re Covid to be shop alone where possible.

Now I totally respect that in certain circumstances there has to be exceptions to this rule e.g. for lone parents, shopping with a vulnerable person etc.

However, there were a huge number of large families (with both parents) shopping today, lots and lots of couples (young/middle-aged) etc.

Why are so many people blatantly ignoring the guidance?

OP posts:
YarToTheNar · 08/11/2020 22:42

Sorry against the guidance, not rules.

WhatKatyDidNxt · 08/11/2020 22:47

@YarToTheNar but other people’s behaviour is directly impacting on others. Currently l am sat in lockdown thanks to other people’s behaviour. We were tier 1 as we only had 40 odd in 100,000, it’s not really an issue where l live. Yet l still follow the rules rather than ridiculous Christmas shopping lemming behaviour in tier 3 areas Confused

SakiSiam · 08/11/2020 22:48

'I was raging last weekend, did a dash into primark as twins needed stock up of new pants socks and basics and the place was full and I mean FULL of complete families' ...

What is wrong with people? We're changing into such a hateful nation. Why would you need to go to Primark to stock up on children's underwear, and then complain about others doing it? The supermarkets are still open, and they sell pants and socks.

Original poster
Nicknamegoeshere · 08/11/2020 22:52

@SakiSiam I think what she was saying was that she was shopping on her own whereas others were shopping as whole families?

OP posts:
YarToTheNar · 08/11/2020 22:53

[quote WhatKatyDidNxt]@YarToTheNar but other people’s behaviour is directly impacting on others. Currently l am sat in lockdown thanks to other people’s behaviour. We were tier 1 as we only had 40 odd in 100,000, it’s not really an issue where l live. Yet l still follow the rules rather than ridiculous Christmas shopping lemming behaviour in tier 3 areas Confused[/quote]
And a MN thread moaning about couples shopping together is going to change what exactly?

YarToTheNar · 08/11/2020 22:54

What is wrong with people? We're changing into such a hateful nation

Agree, so bored of it now. It's given people the perfect excuse to judge and bash everyone around them with glee.

MzHz · 08/11/2020 23:12

@YarToTheNar

What is wrong with people? We're changing into such a hateful nation

Agree, so bored of it now. It's given people the perfect excuse to judge and bash everyone around them with glee.

Agreed

I give up.

Fucking virus is turning people completely fucking brain dead.

Let people manage this shit the best THEY can and @Nicknamegoesheremind YOU mind your own issues and parents etc.

BluebellsGreenbells · 08/11/2020 23:16

YOU mind your own issues and parents etc

Well mind the shop workers, the hospital staff and emergency services, mind the people keeping the economy going - they’re the ones at the biggest risk that you all deem worthless

NovemberRain2 · 08/11/2020 23:18

@HotChoc10

Hadn't realised that was guidance to be honest. I shop with my partner because we don't have a car and so can only bring home what we can carry. If only one of us went we'd be going more or less every day.
Same
NovemberRain2 · 08/11/2020 23:20

We have a trolley. We take our shopping home in one of those pull along trolleys. Stop making assumptions.

user127819 · 08/11/2020 23:29

I've found life is happier when you try to assume the best in these kinds of situations. Yes, some of those people probably don't need to be shopping together but it won't benefit you in the least to get annoyed about it, nor will it make any difference. It's easier mentally to think, "those people probably have a good reason to be together, so I won't give them a second thought."

PinkSpring · 08/11/2020 23:42

Well, it's guidance - not law so people can do what they want. Besides, all this lockdown has done is shut down anything "fun" or "entertaining" so people are bored and want to go out somewhere.

I have no issue with it and I really wouldn't care if someone judged me for shopping with my family.

Icequeen01 · 08/11/2020 23:57

Well COVID has meant that my DH has to come to do the weekly shop with me. We both hate it and we normally end up,falling out. I usually take my 80 year old mother so she can do her shopping but as infections are so high at the moment I don't want her in the supermarkets. I do her shopping whilst DH does our shopping. However, he has no clue about our shopping so we end up going around together. It may well end in a murder!

Anordinarymum · 09/11/2020 00:01

[quote Nicknamegoeshere]@ReneeRol What do you mean? So it's like a family day out?!!! Really?!!![/quote]
It read to me like you are wanting an argument OP !

Just mind your own business and look after yourself. Honestly.

Original poster
Nicknamegoeshere · 09/11/2020 00:06

It's not about minding my own business. If I choose to take my whole family shopping (when I don't have to) I am putting others at more risk than if I go alone. Which I do.
Why do you think the supermarkets are asking for one adult to shop alone where possible?

OP posts:
Whammyyammy · 09/11/2020 00:08

Let me edit this for you;

"Went shopping today, raging that other people were shopping. I should of have the shop to myself and no one else should be shipping, me me me

Anordinarymum · 09/11/2020 00:15

@Nicknamegoeshere

It's not about minding my own business. If I choose to take my whole family shopping (when I don't have to) I am putting others at more risk than if I go alone. Which I do. Why do you think the supermarkets are asking for one adult to shop alone where possible?
What I meant was just concern yourself with your own business and leave others to decide where their boundaries are.

When I go shopping I don't look at anything else but the shopping, and keeping a safe distance from others.

So many threads on here where people get angry about what others are doing - it's pointless.

ZolaGrey · 09/11/2020 00:18

At this stage I think if your side of the fence is clean, you'll do yourself the world of good by not getting irate at things you can't control or change.

Original poster
Nicknamegoeshere · 09/11/2020 00:21

Allow me to re-edit:

Went shopping today. Left the kids at home with my OH because it's safest right now to shop alone and it was possible for me to do so. I am doing my bit to protect those more vulnerable than myself and also to support others such as the shop workers and the NHS. I am hoping that if we all play our part and think of others we will avoid the need for an extended period of lockdown following 2nd December.

Taken from the Lancashire Telegraph, 6/11/2020:

Supermarket giant, Tesco, has joined Sainsbury's and Waitrose in banning couples and families from shopping together under the new national lockdown.

Tesco, which has stores in Accrington,Blackburn, Burnley, Chorley, Clitheroe, Colne, Great Harwood, Haslingden, Rawtenstall and Padiham, is now 'encouraging people to shop on their own', meaning couples will not be allowed to shop together, and families with children can only enter if the children cannot stay at home.

OP posts:
Blueberries0112 · 09/11/2020 00:29

"People are so fucking nosey at the moment."

When my local food market gets too crowded like it's a party going on and I am trying to avoid Coronavirus (because my kids have been hospitalized over a virus before because of Asthma) how Am I being nosey when I feel like they are making it impossible for me shop for their food?

Defenbaker · 09/11/2020 00:34

YANBU, I see a lot of families (both parents, plus 2 or 3 kids) treating a browse around the shop as a family day out - very annoying, on so many levels. I do understand why single parents might have to bring their children along, but when there are two parents in the same household, shopping as a whole family makes social distancing much harder.

The problem is that so many places are closed and the weather is cold, so people are desperate for somewhere to take their bored children. Not a valid excuse really, but I guess that's their way of thinking. Try not to get irate about it, just give them a wide berth and move on.

Bridecilla · 09/11/2020 00:47

Drives me mad too op.

To be fair, pre-Covid we shopped together as we both enjoy a browse. However i think it's a bit selfish now so we stopped

We (me, dp and ds 8) add shopping to the list on Alexa throughout the week. Quick check through the cupboards and fridge freezer before whichever one of us goes to add anything

If i go i walk there and dp picks me up or he goes.

Love all the excuses though. One woman on sainsbury's Facebook page said she had to go as couple as her husband couldn't possibly buy sanitary products!

Kcar · 09/11/2020 02:33

Went shopping today. Took my dd with me because I’m disabled and because I was shopping for things to take to my 87 year old dad who is dying. I don’t give a fuck how safe or not safe it is for me to shop alone because I needed my daughters support. We have been told we are allowed now. Because he’s dying. Which is wonderful.

I’m trying to decide at what point I should ring my son to bring him home to see his granda but I’m also worried that because he’s on the front line of of Covid I will deprive someone who might be saved of medical care. But ds works in a hospital and might bring Covid to the ward his granda is in (non Covid). So selfish of me.

I know the sanctimonious dickheads say it's safest right now to shop alone and but it was not possible for me to do so. I am doing my bit to protect those more vulnerable than myself every fucking day of my life. One of my children is on the front fucking line and also my other daughter works in a fucking shop. So double fuck to us really.

I am hoping that if the sanctimonious twats need medical care they think of the sacrifices others have made so that they can have that medical care and that if they would stop and think for a moment how hard it is for others they might not be so judgemental.

Sadly, I think that’s a pipe dream and they’ll Carry on with their x ray vision spotting invisible disabilities and judging those just not quite crippled enough.

cologne4711 · 09/11/2020 07:57

Love all the excuses though. One woman on sainsbury's Facebook page said she had to go as couple as her husband couldn't possibly buy sanitary products

Ha ha. And she couldn't' buy them by herself, either;)

timeforanewstart · 09/11/2020 08:38

All those saying its guidance not the law , maybe they are expecting people to act like adults and follow the bloody guidance.
Yes for exceptions people need to take kids or go together etc but it is quite clear some are using as a family day out. Why should others be stood out waiting in the rain when a family of 6 is strolling round , thats 5 other people that could go in .
Also i get some don't drive so partner takes them, but they can also stay in the car and wait .
Its supermarket its not fun
So poor single mum with couple kids who has no choice is stood outside in a que for ages whilst a family or couple who don't have to shop together have an afternoon out

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