Neighbour asked us not to do fireworks?

[lockdownqueen]

I'm in a group chat with girls on our new build estate I've sent out a pre warning as hubby has gone and bought some. Everyone was fine and said they will be in there gardens to watch then one of the girls asked us not too as her dog has severe panic attacks.

don't know what to do? Kids have been looking forward to them.

aibu to go ahead and do them?

And neither are an offence in your own garden.

@LucilleBluth

I have three dogs but I would and do have fireworks.

And I absolutely agree about antisocial dog owners all year round. The amount of dog shit I Wade through on my walks is unbelievable.

I think that evens it up.

err ok

Do people really think that the fact some dog owners are inconsiderate is justification to knowingly scare animals with unnecessary loud bangs?

It's not the animals fault if they have crap owners.

It's worse this year as there are DIY fireworks constantly from all directions . My border collie is quivering under my chair. I nearly lost him when walking him this afternoon due to an early firework, I thought his collar would break. I can see it's hard to control as it's no particular person on either side.

I think as its tonight when everyone knows there are fireworks going off then she is being unreasonable.

I mean in this house I have a dog and a 7 year old with serious sound sensitivity due to SEN who is petrified of fireworks. Yes tonight is crap it always is. He is under his weighted blanket with ear defenders with every single sensory calming device we have. He is still shaking and we have had a meltdown. Actually ddog is deaf as a post so genuinely not remotely bothered. Ds1 is terrified.

Ultimately however that is noone elses problem. I hate this " selfish selfish selfish " winging. Is it not also selfish to demand the whole area bows down to your needs?

I do get annoyed with fireworks let off outside of tonight and no I personally do think it's not great in a residential area. But I can think what I like. Why should my opinion or family needs take precedence. They don't nor do anyone elses.

It's an established firework night she needs to handle things in her home the way I've handled in mine. Figure it out. Ds1 is basically inoculated against the sound the best I can (which doesn't really work as he still knows its happening) I will deal with the meltdown. Ddog has her special blankets incase she feels the vibrations and I'm staying close to her.

Manage the needs and requirements in your own house and stop expecting others to tiptoe around you. (Err for your neighbour OP not aiming that at you )

@Shitonthebloodything

I never understand this. If people know their pets are going to be frightened at this time of year, every year then isn't there something they can do about it? Maybe I'm just being heartless because I'm not a dog person and my cats have never been bothered by them but surely it's to be expected each year.

Something they can do about it - like what? Especially in the middle of a pandemic there aren't exactly many options for getting away from them!

We have a dog (2 years old today) who loathes fireworks, which he can hear from miles away. He barks constantly and is inconsolable. My husband is driving him around in the car right now in the hope that this will block out what's going on. There's sod all we can do this year, but we're going to consult the vet for behavioural therapy, possibly bolstered by drugs; and we plan to spend this week in deep Devon next year, since we can't ask the whole of south London not to set off fireworks tonight. Maybe your neighbour should do something similar, because if it weren't you, it would be someone else.

@brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

go for it. my son has panic attacks when dogs run up to him, but people still walk dogs every single day.

In addition, it is not illegal, it is Bonfire Night and you have prewarned people who frankly should be prepared for fireworks tonight.

Enjoy with your children.

@Shitonthebloodything

I never understand this. If people know their pets are going to be frightened at this time of year, every year then isn't there something they can do about it? Maybe I'm just being heartless because I'm not a dog person and my cats have never been bothered by them but surely it's to be expected each year.

What can we do?

Even sedation doesn’t always work it’s a horrible tradition, no idea why people can’t just use silent ones

@namechangefail2020

Her dog isn't more important than your kids. She can take him for a walk for a bit. It's once and kids need their fun right now and as much normality as poss.

Fucking clueless.

Ultimately however that is noone elses problem. I hate this " selfish selfish selfish " winging. Is it not also selfish to demand the whole area bows down to your needs?
Dear god.
Is it not just basic manners and decency to consider others?!
Like someone else said, taking animals out of the equation, so many ex military men, many homeless, many with MH problems will be suffering and no one gives a crap.
Those same selfish cunts setting off their fireworks will have the absolute nerve to wear their poppy and slag off anyone who doesnt, proudly virtue signalling to everyone.
It makes me so mad!

I how you went ahead, OP. Because everyone else is. You not having them in your garden will make no difference to the dog, because other people are letting them off.

Also, sorry, but kids trump dogs right now. They've missed out on pretty much everything since March. 15 minutes of excitement and joy is reasonable.

It is totally 100% possible to train pets to be ok with fireworks. It just takes a lot of time and you can't start two weeks before fireworks night.

I have a very reactive Border Collie who responds to most things that worry him with loud barking. All of his siblings are afraid of fireworks but because we have spent loads of time using desensitizing sounds for gunshots and fireworks, he is ok about those things and doesn't feel scared. Today both of our next door neighbours had backyard fireworks displays (never had them quite that close before) and this is my dog working away on his dinner while they went off.

For anyone with pets that are scared, look up the desensitizing sounds called Sounds Scary provided free by Dogs trust. There are a few on Spotify too. Use a speaker that can simulate a realistic sound but start very, very quiet. If your dog is getting worried, reduce the volume to start with. It takes a lot of repetitions before you can increase the volume.

Is it not just basic manners and decency to consider others?!

No, it isn’t just basic manners and decency to unfailingly out what others want before what you and your family want. I really dislike people jogging up behind me when I am out walking. It frightens me. I have to accept that other people have the right to do it. I really dislike it when people stand too close to me in the supermarket. I have to accept (outside coronavirus regulations) that this is just me, not them doing something wrong. We don’t always get whatever we want, because other people have a right to live their lives as well.

It’s not just dogs though, it’s foxes, hedgehogs, horses... I’d prefer a few big organised displays.

If you want to do something, there isn't much point in giving people an opportunity to say no. It's something you learn over time!

Anyway, my dog has been fucking shaking all evening and all yesterday evening from people's bloody fireworks. He wanted to poo and was too scared to do it outside so held it in. Poor little baby - he's only 2yo.

The air outside is filthy and smoky tonight.

The sooner this shite is made illegal, the better.

To the poster who says kids trump dogs...
my 2 kids spent the entire evening trying to stop my dog shaking and panting!

@Smallsteps88

Oh dear *@stackemhigh*

Diddums!

Hasn't the government asked people not to do fireworks this year? And no, I haven't waded through the whole f thread.

@saraclara

I how you went ahead, OP. Because everyone else is. You not having them in your garden will make no difference to the dog, because other people are letting them off.

Also, sorry, but kids trump dogs right now. They've missed out on pretty much everything since March. 15 minutes of excitement and joy is reasonable.

But it’s not just dogs left scared.

Peoples “15 minutes” mean my DS and many others are left petrified for the whole evening and many others for the time around tonight

@SoupDragon

dog fouling is an offence and letting fireworks loose is not!

Both are an offence if in a public space.

But they’re being set off in people’s gardens.

I really dislike people jogging up behind me when I am out walking. It frightens me. I have to accept that other people have the right to do it. I really dislike it when people stand too close to me in the supermarket
So because other people are inconsiderate therefore it’s fine for you to be..?
Great way of behaving.
I just despair. I really do.

@suchclearwater

Hasn't the government asked people not to do fireworks this year? And no, I haven't waded through the whole f thread.

I believe they have.

I know that our local fire brigade and many others have asked people please don’t do it too

• So because other people are inconsiderate therefore it’s fine for you to be..? Great way of behaving. I just despair. I really do.*

It is not inconsiderate for someone to run up behind me while jogging. I just happen not to like it.

@MrsJunglelow Quite.