so we are now arresting people NOW Shocking

[Meadow1203]

I thought this was wind up but sadly it is true. A 73 year old retired nurse has been arrested and put in handcuffs because she took her own mother out of a care home. She has not had proper contact for 9 months and her poor 97 year old mum was ailing, she wanted to bring her home to care for her. Wow just wow how have we come to this.

show I am not interested in comments that support locking up old people. Keeping their loves ones away it is barbaric.

So people really think that taking someone out of their home with no plan of how care will be provided or measures to ensure the right things are in place is wise?

I dispair now anyone can think that’s good for anyone. Love isn’t always enough, the correct care is also vital and family aren’t always the people to provide that

@ShowingOut

Nobody is going to just wheel a dementia patient out of care with out real belief of justification.

So @Codexdivinchi do you think that "real belief of justification" means that someone can completely ignore all safeguarding issues?

What if I have a brother, and he disagrees with the care our mother is getting, but I agree with it - is he justified in kidnapping our mother because he has "a real belief of justification"??

I’m not getting pulled in to straw men arguments. That situation you’ve just described hasn’t even happened. So you can’t really compare what this family are going through to some imaginary brother with some imaginary disagreement.

My opinion is based on what I’ve read, seen and heard. My opinion is also based on what the Alzheimer society are saying too.

The word 'care' when used by the state and by institutions is often anything but.

@Meadow1203

show I am not interested in comments that support locking up old people. Keeping their loves ones away it is barbaric.

Preventing people from just walking out with vulnerable family members from care homes, with no thought,plan,care plan,medical info etc in place is not barbaric. It's basic safeguarding. The care home allowed Skype and zoom conversations. They allowed window visits. It's during a window visit that this happened.

Do I think more should have been done for old people in care homes? Yes.

Did this woman act in the right way ? No.

The two are not mutually exclusive.

The care home allowed Skype and zoom conversations. They allowed window visits Absolutely revolting

I’m not getting pulled in to straw men arguments. That situation you’ve just described hasn’t even happened. So you can’t really compare what this family are going through to some imaginary brother with some imaginary disagreement.

Fine. I'll stick to what actually happened. Which is that safeguarding processes were totally ignored, other residents were put in danger of infection, and the daughter was trying to take her confused mother away without even having the right medication for her. But, sure, she had belief!

@Meadow1203

show I am not interested in comments that support locking up old people. Keeping their loves ones away it is barbaric.

So you're cool with even more people bringing covid into care homes? There should be no protection in place at all?

@derxa

The care home allowed Skype and zoom conversations. They allowed window visits Absolutely revolting

It really is.

This is a women who has dementia and may have no idea what Skype is and may even think it’s the TV. Also window visits and Skype are completely pointless if the resident has visual impairment.

Human touch is so completely necessary.

Comeon Answer me this do you have family member in a care home?

Sype and Zoom. FFS is this a joke. My dad can't even use a mobile phone

@derxa

The care home allowed Skype and zoom conversations. They allowed window visits Absolutely revolting

I completely agree. Touch was massively important to my mum in her last few months. I spent every visit holding her hand and/or cuddling her. Anyone who thinks Zoom or FaceTime is adequate knows fuck all about dementia.

@ShowingOut

I’m not getting pulled in to straw men arguments. That situation you’ve just described hasn’t even happened. So you can’t really compare what this family are going through to some imaginary brother with some imaginary disagreement.

Fine. I'll stick to what actually happened. Which is that safeguarding processes were totally ignored, other residents were put in danger of infection, and the daughter was trying to take her confused mother away without even having the right medication for her. But, sure, she had belief!

Add on to that belief - compassion, frustration, fear, anger, despair and you might have an inkling how this family and others are feeling.

Rather than getting angry because some one ‘broke the rules’ try and understand why they did.

So how do you suggest the residents and staff were kept safe?

Vinyl exactly that. My Grandmothers last months were spent in bed, but she seemed to know she was there when my mother sat and held her hand. Sadly there seem to be a lot of people here who know nothing about Dementia but spouting their high and mighty view. My dad was went into a home 2 years ago, I have learnt some much about Dementia since then. And know how difficult it is dealing with the authorities it was a bloody nightmare. These lovely people were at the end of their teather. I know if my dad was in his right mind 100% he would want to take this risk of seeing us. 100%

'There are a lot unpleasant people on here. Who cares the grand daughter is an actress how is that even relevant. People can't even bother to look at the facts but spout their vileness'

And yet you're the only one being unpleasant tbf.

Look, I of course have every sympathy with those missing their relatives but for the trillionth time risk assessments, care planning and health and safety procedures are there to protect residents. This pair put all the residents in danger infection wise by their reckless stunt.

It isn't a prison, people are allowed to leave just not on the spur of the moment without any thought for safety.

comeon why don't you answer my question.

Meadow1203 Do you actually think these two women did the right thing despite having nothing in place, no medication and ignoring the safety of other residents?

You don’t think they could have went about it a different way?

But we can’t just let people walk in and visit. As awful as people not being able to visit is we have already seen what happens when Covid gets into these places and steps need to be taken to reduce that.

Care homes are doing the best they can in a truly shitty situation. People forcing their way in is doing nothing to help anyone though

The situation is only acceptable because we have a society in which old people just don’t matter. Imagine if this was children whose parents were only permitted to see them via Zoom or through a window and weren’t allowed to touch them. There would be total outrage. I never thought I’d be grateful my parents were dead but I am now. My heart goes out to people with loved ones in care homes now.

If old people didn’t matter then the doors to the homes would be thrown wide open and everyone could walk through them. Wouldn’t be many left in the homes, though.

nicky if you read the story they had tried everything and it was a last resort, we need to be able to visit our family and to make decisions for them what we think is best. Sadly this virus is to stay, Are you suggesting we never see our families again. Carers already have PPE so protected, if you have symptoms do not visit, wear a face mask etc. The harm and distress caused by isolating them far out weighs the risk of dying from Covid. This has to stop

They didn’t try everything. How many times do you need told?

YEs they did

@Meadow1203

comeon why don't you answer my question.

Mu dad died of cancer a few and my mum is in another country which means I haven't seen her in person since August 2019. I also wasn't able to go and visit and help her out when she was ill this summer. Fingers crossed we'll see her next year. Happy?

Or does this automatically mean I can't have an opinion?