To think this isn't stingy?

[WaterOffADucksCrack]

Dp has just got home from work and complained at the "stingy" portions left for him. This consists of 5 (good quality) sausages, carrots, peas, broccoli and a large bowl of mash (3 generous portions). Aibu to think this is not stingy at all?

Fwiw he has already eaten breakfast, a pack up and a bacon and egg sandwich from a food van ( I only know this as h3 messaged me). And I know someone is going to ask if I underfeed him (it isn't my job to feed him) but he is 5ft 9 and at least 20 stone.

kowari BECAUSE I CAN'T AFFORD IT AS PREVIOUSLY STATED NUMEROUS TIMES

ComeOnBabyHauntMyBubble You're right, thank you for all the brilliant advice!

But can you afford to actually stay op? The cost of staying to you and your kids is huge....

I don't think you are thinking about it. The issue is that one person is eating way more than their share, not that the budget is too small.

There's a very odd dynamic. in what way?

kowari again, as previously stated he will borrow money for more food.

NeilBuchananisBanksy another issue is only they baby is both of ours.

Substitute drugs or alcohol or gambling for food. Borrowing money from family to fuel his addiction. If he won't do something about it then I think you need to leave.

I think there is only 1 solutions really.
Eat him. And make some man scratchings.

On a seroous note. I kind of get why some posters may think you are scared of him in some way.

I think you need to have very brutal heart to heart. No dancing around the bush, no sigaring it up. Brutal, honest, but not rude discussion. I am normally not for ultimatums, but I would give one about going to get a professional help. It is NOT normal to eat so much you have to borrow money to get more.

@WaterOffADucksCrack

kowari BECAUSE I CAN'T AFFORD IT AS PREVIOUSLY STATED NUMEROUS TIMES

Would you like to live? Do you even still like him? If you'd actually prefer to leave and had enough.. of everything, it doesn't have to be now. You can just plan and take steps that will help further down the line. Find out how much CSA he'd have to pay,what benefits you'd get, what help with childcare will be available, are there jobs you could get that would give you better income etc.?

You might be trapped now, it doesn't mean you'll always be.

He'll have you eating out of the bins OP.

Would you like to live? Of course I want to live?! Do you even still like him? of course I do otherwise I'd leave. Apart from the food thing he's brill. I'm quite ill at the moment and I couldn't have asked for a better partner.

He'll have you eating out of the bins OP. wtf no he won't. I keep some money back each month which he doesn't know about. Why on earth do you think I would eat out of a fucking bin?

SchrodingersImmigrant You're not just funny but also have given the most sensible advice here and I can't thank you enough for that.

I am usually hillarious, I don't know what happened 😂

I am glad I was somewhat helpful. No need to thank. Good luck with him.

@WaterOffADucksCrack

Would you like to live? Of course I want to live?! Do you even still like him? of course I do otherwise I'd leave. Apart from the food thing he's brill. I'm quite ill at the moment and I couldn't have asked for a better partner.

OMG I mean leave!

That sounded quite ominous,for a post that was supposed to be supportive.
Maybe I should stop trying.

Yes but if you didn't keep money hidden, you would have nothing to be able to eat? Can you not see how fucked up that is?

It doesn't matter that only the baby is his, he's not a good role model for your kids.

This is awful.

I do find it really bizarre that you can't seem to understand that you shouldn't need to hide money and food from a partner otherwise he would leave you and the children hungry also that he gets into debt to buy snacks

I’ve read the thread and I see that you’ve said you can’t afford gluten free bread because of your budget, but he’s having an unfair amount of the budget isn’t he? If he ate sensible you could easily afford it as you would be spending less on his unhealthily big meals.

I think that’s what people are trying to say, you are going without because for some reason feeding him excessive amounts is seen as a priority.

If he weighs 20 stone and has eaten what he's already eaten plus is going to eat 5 sausages with the trimmings he's a greedy git and if he was my husband I'd tell him so but I would not put it so politely. X

ComeOnBabyHauntMyBubble 😂😂😂

copperoliver May I ask how you would word it? As I feel like I've tried every polite way now!

RandomMess it isn't a problem with understanding/comprehension, I'm not q fucking idiot

This is awful. can you elaborate? From your posts I feel like you're blaming me for his problems.

@WhereverIGoddamnLike

20 stone? Seriously? Is this a fat bashing thread?

You already know you've left him more than a normal sized meal, so you're not unreasonable. The problem is him and his overeating. That's all very obvious and you really didnt need to ask if it was unreasonable. You also didnt need to include his weight, unless you're looking for a bun fight over that.

20 stone at 5'9" is obese. It's not fat bashing, it's a fact

@Littleposh

Usually when someone starts a thread in which someone has done something which is totally ridiculous and wrong regarding food (so she doesnt need to ask because it's obvious) and then mentions "oh, he's really big," it's usually looking for a whole load of "what a disgusting fat person" responses.

Fat people know they are fat. It is a fact. But a thread of people calling fat people disgusting is not factual or nice or necessary.

All the other info the OP drip fed is totally separate from starting it out in the same pattern of the usual "arent fat people disgusting" trope.