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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to not understand why parents allow their children to go trick or treating?

362 replies

teaandtoast49 · 29/10/2020 08:49

Even disregarding the current coronavirus situation, I have always found myself disagreeing with the concept of allowing children to go trick or treating, as well as Halloween in general. My dp is slightly more relaxed about this, so am I just being ridiculous? I was never allowed to go trick or treating as a child, go to sleepovers, etc. and while I understand now that my parents probably were in the right, I would love to gauge the opinions on MN about it.

OP posts:
MerchantOfVenom · 30/10/2020 18:28

These threads are always hilarious.

To the sane people - just be thankful you, your family, friends and neighbours are giving your kids a good time and nice memories.

SueEllenMishke · 30/10/2020 18:28

Trick or treating is just blackmail, or extortion. ‘Give me something or I’ll harm you or your property’. Not nice. Not good to encourage. American import. And shops etc it’s just another money-making enterprise.

Yep... you'd better give my 6 year old some sweets or he'll put your windows through 🙄

MerchantOfVenom · 30/10/2020 18:29

And Halloween will be just the same as ever this year, as we are very fortunate not to have COVID.

MilkRunningOutAgain · 30/10/2020 18:29

My kids did trick or treating when they were small because it was fun and exciting.

numberoneson · 30/10/2020 18:30

@SleepOhHowIMissYou

a slippery slide to the occult

Assuming that by occult you mean devil worship then you'll find that the only people who actually believe in the devil (and God) are those who follow religions with Old Testament dogma.

These religions have their own occult elements (the Holy Ghost) and the scary costumes were intended to ward off evil on the night that the veil was thinnest between the spirit world and ours.

Well, you're quite wrong in stating that the only people who actually believe in the devil (and God) are those who follow religions with Old Testament dogma. I believe very strongly in God - but I believe the Old Testament (and much of the New) was actually a method of social control, not the literal truth. I don't trust organised religions, but have my own faith.

As to trick or treating, I think this idea of only going to houses that are decorated or have a pumpkin out is a great one. When I was wee we had parties instead - dookin' for apples and such like, but there was no guising because it just wasn't a thing in my neighbourhood.

I'm also very glad we don't have it nowadays in my very rural area, berecause living alone, for me people in my property is really scarey.

Ineke · 30/10/2020 18:31

When I was a child Trick or Treat did not exist. Neither did Halloween. It's all come over from USA. We had fireworks and a bonfire on November 5th. I also never had a sleepover but that would be because I was at boarding school. My DC though do it all and loved dressing up and getting treats. It's fun for them. And as for sleepovers, my daughter spent many a night with her friends, and her friends came here. My son not so much, but he did like dressing up for Halloween. This year though is different and I would not recommend trick or treating this time. Parents will have to have treasure hunts in the home instead. It's very American but just a bit of fun.No harm in it.

JumpingJamboree · 30/10/2020 18:31

I was never allowed to go trick or treating as my parents thought it was a form of begging.
The most annoying thing though was that they would still buy a bucket load of sweets and give them away to all the kids that did knock on our door Envy

TheKeatingFive · 30/10/2020 18:34

When I was a child Trick or Treat did not exist. Neither did Halloween. It's all come over from USA

Argggggghhhhh

FFS.

PhilSwagielka · 30/10/2020 18:35

Whenever I’ve seen kids, they’ve either been in groups or had parents with them if they’re little.

crimsonlake · 30/10/2020 18:35

I have never agreed with it so we always enjoyed Halloween in the house, snacks, games and always ending with hide and seek in the dark.
As for sleep overs luckily it was not a thing when mine were younger, as teenagers it would usually happen on someones birthday.

PhilSwagielka · 30/10/2020 18:36

@Ineke

When I was a child Trick or Treat did not exist. Neither did Halloween. It's all come over from USA. We had fireworks and a bonfire on November 5th. I also never had a sleepover but that would be because I was at boarding school. My DC though do it all and loved dressing up and getting treats. It's fun for them. And as for sleepovers, my daughter spent many a night with her friends, and her friends came here. My son not so much, but he did like dressing up for Halloween. This year though is different and I would not recommend trick or treating this time. Parents will have to have treasure hunts in the home instead. It's very American but just a bit of fun.No harm in it.
Halloween is a Celtic festival. The Irish and Scots carved turnips for jack o’lanterns - still do. Guising is also a Scottish thing.
CraftyGin · 30/10/2020 18:37

Very British Problem: buying a cart load of fun-size chocolate bars, praying that no one will knock on the door.

Commonwasher · 30/10/2020 18:38

I hate it. It’s basically begging with menaces but my children like it and in our community we only call on people with a pumpkin out.

I grew up in a bit of London where if you didn’t answer the door on Halloween teenagers threw bits of brick through your windows or smashed mouldy eggs on your car — maybe that put me off Hmm

UndertheCedartree · 30/10/2020 18:41

My DC love to go trick or treating and it's a great way to get to know people in your neigbourhood. Of course we only knock on the doors of those that have signaled they are joining in by having a pumpkin outside.
I can't see what could be wrong with having fun with your community?

Daphnise · 30/10/2020 18:42

I don't open the front door to such people.

NeverAMillionMilesAway · 30/10/2020 18:45

YABU. You don't need to participate by allowing your children to go trick or treating, or by answering your door. But what other people choose to do is their business.

FelicisNox · 30/10/2020 18:47

YABU and your post is conflicting.

You say you "see now that your parents were probably in the right" this tells me that as a child you clearly didn't agree with their view and hated being left out so that begs the question why you've adopted their choices as an adult?

Why are you so opposed? Is it because you have a genuine reason because you've not quantified it or is it because you've had it drummed into you that it's not the done thing? Some self study is in order.

Halloween is a bigger deal now than it was so you need to decide if you're prepared to be the fun sponge in your house going forward.

Could you comprise and let the kids dress up and give out sweets instead of going out and about?

I feel icky about knocking on doors because I was also not allowed to engage and was told it's a form of begging (!?). My comprise was to let my sister take them or have a Halloween house party, I made hot dogs, jacket potatoes and cupcakes and let the kids dress up, watch Ghostbusters and dish out sweets... they came to prefer it, especially when it was raining.

Qwertywerty3 · 30/10/2020 18:54

This reply has been deleted

Withdrawn at the user's request

MerchantOfVenom · 30/10/2020 18:56

Why weren’t you allowed to go to sleepovers? That’s strange.

Because there’s a paedophile lurking in every household, obvs.

user1472151176 · 30/10/2020 18:59

We don't really participate in Halloween. My little children like to go trick or treating but we only know on doors of people we know are participating. I hate it, makes me uncomfortable. But 8t is nice to say hello to people in the village. To be honest I don't really get all the hype and I'll be glad when it's over so that we can start to focus on Christmas.
I do feel a bit tricked this year. With many villages and towns and cities participating in the Halloween trails - which we have participated in - it has basically made our house fair game for people to knock on our door. We are not in tier 3 so technically we can do the traditional trick or treating but I don't want to risk it this year either knocking on doors or having people knocking on my door. I don't want to take decorations down for the trail either. Do I ignore door knocks or put up a sign politely asking people not to knock. I don't think putting out bowls of sweets is a good idea either.

derxa · 30/10/2020 19:03

@WorraLiberty

This thread.

Every. Single. Year 😂😂

Yes It's not a new thing here in Scotland. It's GUISING here and I used to do it as a child. I'm 61 [grin[
PhilSwagielka · 30/10/2020 19:19

@Serin

I'm with Billy Connolly on fun in childhood. You are a long time old, let them enjoy some magic FFS. We celebrated everything in this house, tooth fairies, Easter, Samhain, Divali, Notting hill carnival, royal events, the lot. We went on holidays just to look for Dragons or King Arthur. We even had a colony of Teddy bears living at the bottom of the garden. One of our adult kids has just applied for a masters in fairy stories in Denmark so I guess they are a bit fucked up though Grin You would hate me OP.
That sounds amazing. I love folk tales and fairy stories.
Crummyfunnymummy · 30/10/2020 19:27

TheKeatingFive
I’m with you. Anti-Americanism is rife sadly

Lineornoline · 30/10/2020 19:40

I have never understood it. We spend our lives telling children to not take sweets from strangers, then one night a year give them a free pass to do just that. Because they are dressed up? It’s a really odd concept when you think about it

Marmitecrackers · 30/10/2020 19:40

As a child I wasn't allowed to go trick or treating as it was considered to be begging.

In the last village we lived in all the local children went to the decorated houses. I don't mind that as there is an unwritten code if who wants to play and reciprocate. I think it's fun under that circumstance.

Not if kids approach houses that are not participating though.