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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not let neighbour park on our drive

261 replies

Sexnotgender · 27/10/2020 18:45

Neighbour 2 up approached DH the other day to ask a favour.

He’s getting a new car and doesn’t want to park it on the road in case it gets damaged. There’s plenty of parking and it’s a fairly quiet road but he wants to park it off road. Can’t park on his own driveway as his wife’s car is there. Wants to use ours.

Was I unreasonable to say a flat out no?

OP posts:
Dugsbollox · 27/10/2020 18:46

Of course yanbu 😂

Lurchermom · 27/10/2020 18:46

What a cheeky beggar. Why can't his wife's car go on the road?
I'd say he can, so long as he pays for the privilege. You set the price!

AvoidingRealHumans · 27/10/2020 18:47

If it was a one off then I would have let him but he's taking the piss here expecting it to be long term.
His wife will have to park on the road so his precious car can go on the drive.

WorraLiberty · 27/10/2020 18:47

It's your driveway so it's entirely your choice.

We don't have a car so I always let my neighbour park on ours. I like the fact it makes it look as though someone is home when we're out.

But again, your driveway, your choice.

thetoughhaveleft · 27/10/2020 18:47

Where will you park your car, assuming you have one, in his master plan?

lunar1 · 27/10/2020 18:47

Cheeky sod! No chance.

Original poster
Sexnotgender · 27/10/2020 18:49

I feel bad as our drive is enormous but I don’t want to start faffing with asking him to move if we have visitors or the gardener wants access. It’s a really big car he’s getting and it would make it difficult to get passed with a lawnmower etc.

OP posts:
Original poster
Sexnotgender · 27/10/2020 18:49

@thetoughhaveleft

Where will you park your car, assuming you have one, in his master plan?
There really is plenty of room which is why I feel a bit guilty!
OP posts:
Original poster
Sexnotgender · 27/10/2020 18:51

@AvoidingRealHumans

If it was a one off then I would have let him but he's taking the piss here expecting it to be long term. His wife will have to park on the road so his precious car can go on the drive.
Yeah as a one off I’d totally be fine with it. Our next door neighbours had work done a couple of months ago that required scaffolding and I offered them the use of our driveway while work was ongoing as it was a finite length of time.
OP posts:
RelaisBlu · 27/10/2020 18:53

No it was not unreasonable and I think you were very wise.

Some years ago we ended up falling out with a neighbour who we allowed to park on our drive. They did so with less & less regard for us over the months, showing no thought or consideration as time went on.

In the end we brought the arrangement to an end - she was really offended and bad-mouthed us to all the neighbours. (She has since moved away I'm glad to say)

No good deed ever goes unpunished!

I learnt my lesson and would never enter into such an arrangement again. Other neighbours have asked (we have a very large drive) and some have even offered money but we always say no.

Dugsbollox · 27/10/2020 18:54

Honestly, don't feel bad. He has a drive, he can either park there, or park on the road. He knew he'd have either of these options before he bought a new car. It's not your problem to help him solve!

RelaisBlu · 27/10/2020 18:56

I feel bad as our drive is enormous

Don't feel bad! It was partly this sort of guilt that made me feel we had to say yes - don't do it!

Original poster
Sexnotgender · 27/10/2020 18:57

@RelaisBlu

No it was not unreasonable and I think you were very wise.

Some years ago we ended up falling out with a neighbour who we allowed to park on our drive. They did so with less & less regard for us over the months, showing no thought or consideration as time went on.

In the end we brought the arrangement to an end - she was really offended and bad-mouthed us to all the neighbours. (She has since moved away I'm glad to say)

No good deed ever goes unpunished!

I learnt my lesson and would never enter into such an arrangement again. Other neighbours have asked (we have a very large drive) and some have even offered money but we always say no.

That’s my concern really. It starts off all amicable and pleasant then we ask him to move to accommodate visitors and he gets arsey or isn’t in. It feels like a way to ruin neighbourly relations.
OP posts:
StartingGridGo · 27/10/2020 18:59

He has a drive, he can park his car on it.

In my experience of this (with a work car park)... you let him use your drive and before you know it you're getting the blame for any little scratches or dings that appear on his car, if he's not using your drive he'll be telling his visitors to use it, after a couple of months it'll be "his space" and he'll forget that it's you doing him the huge favour.

DeciduousPerennial · 27/10/2020 18:59

He should buy a car that fits his circumstances, not expect you to flex yours to accommodate him

Original poster
Sexnotgender · 27/10/2020 19:00

@DeciduousPerennial

He should buy a car that fits his circumstances, not expect you to flex yours to accommodate him
So not a Hummer then😂
OP posts:
RelaisBlu · 27/10/2020 19:00

It feels like a way to ruin neighbourly relations

Exactly!

OhWhatFuckeryIsThisNow · 27/10/2020 19:00

He shouldn’t have bought such a big car if he wasn’t prepared to park it on his own property safely. Cheeky sod.

Bargebill19 · 27/10/2020 19:03

Yanbu. As others have said. He buys a car to fit, or swaps with his wife and she parks on the road.

HetHetHet · 27/10/2020 19:03

What's wrong with his wife parking her car on the road instead of his new one?

Seems an awful lot more reasonable than even suggesting parking on yours!

CaraDuneRedux · 27/10/2020 19:07

What a cheeky sod he is! Totally right call saying no.

stella1know · 27/10/2020 19:09

YANBU. A drive costs money to pave and maintain, even if it concreted it still costs money to look after. It is your space. If you says yes, he will (as a pp suggested), forever park there and let multiple guests use it too.
It is also a liability issue: what if he bumps into your house and blames you for not clearing away leaves or moss or de-icing it for him in Winter.
He may even sell his house and whisper the secret perk to the new buyer.
Also, what do you do if the car breaks down/flat battery on your driveway, Or he goes on holiday, and you need access?
Or if the car is scratched or stolen, and it was on your land, could also complicate things.
Please save yourself the administrative and organisational effort and say no. It will spiral out of control.

Chloemol · 27/10/2020 19:09

The wife can put her car on the road. Or if the gardens big enough he can convert it to extra drive way

No way would I allow anyone to park on the drive

Sparklesocks · 27/10/2020 19:11

He shouldn’t buy a new car if he doesn’t have anywhere to put it (or doesn’t want it on the street).

PanamaPattie · 27/10/2020 19:11

We've had this. We can park several cars but we have a large family that come and go. I bought a house with enough parking for our needs. Perhaps your neighbour should do the same. CF.