To think it is neglectful to let your child get overweight

[jackson14478]

If you cannot provide your child with basic nutrition, a balanced diet and enough exercise, would you say it's child neglect?

I know for a fact that low income/benefits families can feed their children a healthy diet at a similar cost to an unhealthy one. I've done it and so have friends.

Letting your child become grossly overweight through no fault of their own is not responding to their basic needs

Buy some fruit or veg what you can access cheap then.

Nite that these deserts are much less common than people on MN seem to think. About 2% of people appear to live there.

Could you walk for two miles with two kids under three whilst carrying a week's worth of shopping? I couldn't.

Food deserts are subjective.

Additionally, if the apples are extortionately expensive I don't think it's as easy to say 'buy something cheap'. Sometimes there's nothing cheap. Hence the cycle continues.

So I guess that we can all agree that starting a thread stating that parents with an overweight child, or anorexic etc, is goady and pretty disgraceful really

chickenyhead no I couldn't agree with that

I never said you either became fat or anorexic by being called fat. What nonsense.

I agree OP

Of course it's neglectful. Hth

@chickenyhead

Well I do hope that all the judgy pants on here are going to equally criticise parents of anorexic children? Because that also causes long term irreparable damage.

Or is that ok because it is a mental health issue?

Is it possible that overeating could also significantly be a mental health issue? I mean, nobody WANTS to be fat and judged by you all.

Why is it that one receives great sympathy whilst the other and greedy no good scum? On yes, it doesn't look pretty to you judge types.

There is a massive gap in the research in to the mental health reasons for being overweight. Because it is just easier to blame greedy fat scum.

I don't agree with a word of the OPs nonsense however....

Anorexia is a mental health condition.

And no , we wouldn't start a thread about it because it would be shot down and rightly so as would many other issues ther we blamed parents for. but we allow it for overweight children. Why?

Yes as a society we are neglecting our children when it comes to weight. Although I believe having something nice to eat is part and parcel of a playdate, I'm sometimes shocked at how much is handed out. My daughter was given what I would consider to be 4 puddings (chocolate bars etc) at a recent playdate - it wasn't even a birthday! I think that now so many adults are overweight we feel that we're starving our children if we give them the correct portion size. So although I sound like I'm blaming others I really want to move away from a 'its not my fault' attitude to a 'what can I do about it?' one.

Exactly, why?

Many people have said on here that hey have several healthy weight children and one who is overweight, but the smug judgements continue.

Ridiculous and pathetic.

Never any smug judgement from me Chicken.

All children are different and have different emotional needs. If a child is eating for comfort this needs to be addressed.

If children are buying unhealthy food against the wishes of their parents,this needs to be addressed.

There's no excuse for under feeding,over feeding and not teaching healthy food relationships. If you are not equipped to do this,help is needed urgently.

Sadly there is not enough support and help for parents in this situation. So some people are giving their opinions and tips,it's what this place is for.
Of course you will find mean unhelpful people here too.

Anorexia is caused by mental health issues but overeating can also be caused by mental health issues. People don't generally just overeat there is a reason.
However it's always been acceptable to fat shame.

@Notimeforaname
Yes I agree, helpful tips from personal experience are useful in most circumstances. Especially from those who have experienced the difficulties of managing a child with those issues specifically.

No its never acceptable to fat shame.

Help and support should be given to ANY child who eats for comfort or denies themselves food. Either way...there is an emotional problem within the child which is creating an unhealthy relationship with food. Its absolutely the parents job to do whatever they can to help this.

chickenyhead and I do. I work in the heath and fitness area. Pre covid - about 30% of work was done with children. I have first hand experience.

• 30% of MY work was with children.

@Notimeforaname

Children aren't satiated on fruit and veg, that's the reality

No,you definitely cannot say this for all children.

I was raised vegetarian with no crap food. We were extremely poor in the mid 80s.
I know many kids who are satisfied with fruits and vegetables. It's true that not all are..but again this is something that is taught from a young age.

But surely your diet also contained grains, carbs and protein? A balanced diet.

If you had to choose a bowl of pasta or an apple I know which would fill me up more. We cannot ignore the glaring issue that fruit and veg is massively inflated compared to any other food group.

But surely your diet also contained grains, carbs and protein? A balanced diet oh of course it did.
I was just picking up on the poster sayin NO child would be satisfied with fruits and veg . She only mentioned those two.
Personally I never liked pasta and bread as it makes me bloat and never agreed with me . But some posters are acting like there is no way children exist who eat mainly fruit and veg. It is a reality for children who were raised that way.

And I never said anything about food groups. I mentioned nothing about carbs ,proteins fats etc.

Many people have said on here that hey have several healthy weight children and one who is overweight, but the smug judgements continue
I'm not judging either. I think your taking comments to heart I've one chunky child and a skinny DC plus a chunky DP.
As I said somewhere throughout the thread their diet isn't very different.
I'll do by best to subconsciously teach both my DC about food choices and encourage exercise. He's nearly 6 the slim one is 12.

All the very visibly overweight children I know have parents who feed them junk because they can’t be bothered to think about and cook a nutritious meal. It’ll be beige oven food or takeaways. They also don’t exercise and are driven everywhere, even the 10 minute walk to school. Lazy parents + lazy children.

It is certainly neglect.

My older 3 DC have never been overweight as they were always very active. I never rationed sugar and they had plenty of puddings and sweets. My youngest did start getting a belly over lockdown just because he wasn’t getting the walk to school and being as active as he normally is. Even just not walking around school/running around the playground, normal activity you don’t even notice, had an impact so we resolved it by making him go on long walks and bike rides most days of the week and now he’s back at school, he’s fine.

It’s is absolutely a parent’s responsibility to notice this and take action before it gets out of control which is much, much harder to deal with.

As has been said though some children can be heavier than others in the same family even if the diet is similar.
I know that's not always the case (isn't in my case) but do you think those parents are neglectful?

As has been said though some children can be heavier than others in the same family even if the diet is similar.
I know that's not always the case (isn't in my case) but do you think those parents are neglectful?
If the child is at an unhealthy weight and no steps are taken whatsoever to rectify it then yes it is negligent.

Or if the child is a healthy weight but has a bad relationship with food this absolutely needs to be looked into. If a child is struggling physically or emotionally it's the parents job to get to the bottom of it.