To feel like there are fewer and fewer mums on Mumsnet?

[changerr]

Sooo many threads are full of people who either:

1. Have no children and don't want children
2. Are men

Or maybe it's just my imagination.....? (and before I get flamed, obviously everyone is welcome)

@Mistymonday

Not a mum but ttc, which is why I am here. If I fail to conceive do I need to leave then?

Me, too; I did; and I haven’t. 😁

I feel like I see more men on threads than I did 10 years ago. Not sure what their agenda is? Even if they have one.

It’s not the same place as it used to be, but that’s ok.

It's the sections you are posting in.

There are plenty of parents who post in other sections.

I think there had definitely been an increase in non mums posting in recent years. I was on here before I had kids and there weren’t many of us then. I think it’s more noticeable because there are a handful of vocal posters who appear to actively dislike kids and motherhood, which changes the tone.

I haven’t noticed more men posting as men, there have always been a few who post pretending to be women and not being very good at it.

@sabrinaq

I get totally fed up of childfree people posting on the threads where someone is having a meltdown over parenting and saying - I knew having kids would be a nightmare and that's why I don't have any! Unhelpful in the extreme.

That's about the only point where parent/ non parent bothers me. Particularly where a SN is involved and standard parenting experience is not very relevant either.

I come here for the general conversation. Some threads are relvant to parenting, a lot aren't.

The actual sections relating to being a parent are relatively small and actually not as well visited/commented on from what I've seen.

Most people seem to come to mumsnet for the Relationships or AIBU boards

But if MN limited the content of the site to just parenting discussions they'd have a lot fewer visitors and presumably a lot lower income 🤷‍♀️

They should probably rename the site "I hate mensnet" or "I hateMILSnet" as that seems to be the majority of the content

There are more childfree people than before, but that reflects a general societal trend more than anything else. And a couple of opinionated posters completely lacking in empathy posting on emotional threads. FWR and AIBU generate a lot of press and attract a lot of interested people who might not have considered MN as a place to visit before.

There have always been a ton of goady fuckers and idiots, plenty of men even when I joined and my registration number is in the 35000s. As long as Mumsnet remains female dominated I don't care.

I'd say it's swung in the opposite direction over the years. Though it terrifies me to say I've been here almost 18 years, in those early years talk about pregnancy, babies and parenting stuff seemed less frequent than now. You'd be able to spend all day talking about life, politics, the news, the telly, your make up, your minge (!!) and never a "should I tell the teacher" would pass by.
I think in those days people joined because they were parents, but then saw from the content that it didn't have to be parenting that defined them.
That's definitely shifted I think. I think the age demographic is probably much younger now too, so, by definition, people becoming parents on Mumsnet.

Not that it matters of course. I can still just scroll past talk of feeding and pushchairs.
If it became all parenty stuff I'd probably get more work done though.

@DobbyTheHouseElk

I feel like I see more men on threads than I did 10 years ago. Not sure what their agenda is? Even if they have one.

It’s not the same place as it used to be, but that’s ok.

Because men are parents too?

I actually also disagree that only another parent's view is valid. Again, this is something that's shifted over the years. Precious First Born issues would be given short shrift and quite rightly, but now it's all "your baby your rules" and "if anyone said that to my son I'd kick their heads in".
And often it takes an outsider (relatively speaking) to see the real situation. I've lost count, as I'm sure we all have, of the times we read threads where parents can't believe their child is being "accused of" being naughty when he's just "boisterous" and "no angel" when everyone knows that that kid's teacher dreads his arrival every morning. You still get posters saying "go and ask the teacher what REALLY goes on when you're not there" but those are rare compared to the "write to the head/the LEA/the governors/the Pope" answers.

Like I said, different era, different demographic.

I joined MN many years ago because of a particular topic I was interested in no idea if the posters on there are parents, unless they mention it in passing, and I don’t actually care. I happen to be a mum but it’s not why I joined.

I wonder why so many non mothers are on this site? Could it be that out of 27 topics on this site only 2 are anything to do with parenting??? Why is it surprising to you that a site with 25 non parenting related topics are of interest to non parents???

You’d have to spend a lot of time on every thread on MN to really ascertain that. Are you sure OP that you aren’t simply using it slightly differently yourself; spending more time on different boards than you did a few years ago? Also when something is called “Mumsnet” people may be inclined or feel the need to state when they aren’t a “female parent“, “I’m just commenting as a father” or “I don’t have children” so you notice that. It’s a bit of a shame when people who don’t have children or do have the Y chromosome feel they need to explain themselves Or preface their opinions or before offering perfectly valid contributions, so I definitely value a continued broadening of contributors (if that is what is happening)..

I tend to look at AIBU, education, MH and the botwatch threads, most other areas of MN are completely uncharted territory. I probably mention my children in 10% of my posts and I’ve never mentioned whether I’m male or female (though some of my posts will give it away!). I also agree with @TheSeedsOfADream that MN is likely to change its tone over the years as ways of approaching things such as parenting shift and fashions come and go and the terms we use to explain and describe things change.

I haven’t really noticed a dramatic shift in demographic.

I joined years before having dd and am not really drawn to actual parenting conversations much. MN is pretty unique on the internet in that it is primarily frequented by women and isn’t twee, plus it’s busy. I think it will always be predominantly women on here but there’s no rule saying that you have to have procreated or own a vagina to post.

I am childfree and came to mumsnet about 6 years ago after googling for advice and it throwing up a mumsnet thread, didn’t take much for me to get addicted!

I wouldn’t comment on a parenting thread though, unless I had something useful to say - I have worked with children for over 10 years and have been working with autistic children and adults for 3 years so occasionally I have something to add!

@Yeahnahmum

Its called MUMSnet....

Can you elaborate on your point of view?

@Chicchicchicchiclana

I have the same impression as you OP. Definitely more goady men and people who are visiting with a specific agenda.

Agree, definitely. Some very 'get a grip woman' type comments increasingly. Many posts clearly from people working in certain sectors and posting in their professional not parental capacity, with a political agenda. Possibly now increased numbers of freelance PR/marketing/lobbyist people in addition to the freelance journalists. I think the low level aggressive tone is putting people off. I just see the same old names again and again, and their nastiness is probably putting people off posting.

I still don't get your point OP, and since you've posted in AIBU you presumably have an opinion either way.

No I've not noticed but I fail to see why it matters. I mention my DS sometimes yet rarely ask about or comment on parenting issues.

I'm not a mum (nor do i want to be one), but I enjoy using a forum (a dying thing these days) with primarily female userbase to discuss lifestyle, etc

@sabrinaq

I get totally fed up of childfree people posting on the threads where someone is having a meltdown over parenting and saying - I knew having kids would be a nightmare and that's why I don't have any! Unhelpful in the extreme.

Yes this is irritating as fuck.

Although I did enjoy one poster a few years back who lectured everyone for weeks about baby sleep and how we were all Doing It Wrong and should listen to her, before letting on that she was pregnant with her first

Maybe they don’t want to identify as male or female? Therefore won’t call themselves a mother?

@MinnieMountain

I still don't get your point OP, and since you've posted in AIBU you presumably have an opinion either way.

No I've not noticed but I fail to see why it matters. I mention my DS sometimes yet rarely ask about or comment on parenting issues.

I don't have a "point". I'm asking if my perception of reality is correct or not. Which is what AIBU is about, right?

One of the clearest ways you can see this is a site aimed at mothers is that if anyone dares to ask a question like the OP, they immediately get piled on for somehow(?) not making everyone feel equally welcome and valued and comfortable. Welcome to being everybody’s mummy!

@Yeahnahmum

Its called MUMSnet....

Yes it is. And I recently bought a mobile from the Carphone Warehouse....

Yes it is. And I recently bought a mobile from the Carphone Warehouse....

I went to Currys the other day ... not a madras in sight .