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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Another CF neighbour parking one...

316 replies

Lillipops · 14/10/2020 08:43

Hello fellow Mumsnetters I have for you a CF neighbor parking issue I have included a diagram so I hope it makes sense. We live in a semi detached house which has a driveway. At the end of the driveway a footpath cuts across and then there is another drive which goes down to the road. It is long enough to fit at least 4 cars because the house is set back from the road. Relatively modern development but ours and next door are the only ones in the street with such driveway. Our boundary runs from the edge of our garage down to the main road as shown in our deeds, there is a line where the concrete has been laid on the 2nd bit of the drive but other than that there is no visible division if you see what I mean. We park our car on the drive just in line with our house. A new couple have moved in next door with 3 cars. Instead of moving one of their cars off the drive to move them around they have taken to just driving across our drive to get around it. AIBU that this is so cheeky? It's really winding me and especially my partner up. This is NOT a shared drive and they are driving across our land because they are so lazy rather than just move their cars. I wouldn't mind if they had asked or queried it but they just seem to do what they like. I've attached a picture so you can see.....hit me mumsnetters

Another CF neighbour parking one...
OP posts:
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8
WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll · 15/10/2020 10:25

It is about boundaries here - in more ways than one. Once they get used to the idea that they have the free use of both parts of their own drive plus access via next door's drive to prevent them from having to juggle their cars on their own property (and the public road), they could very easily become resentful if they see somebody later 'depriving' them of it - even if it's just somebody wanting to take back use of their own property. If you got another car, I wonder if they would just think 'well, it was good whilst it lasted' or if they would feel aggrieved. I bet it would be the latter if you got one additional car and wanted to park one car on each section of your drive and wouldn't put it past them to try to browbeat you into putting them both on the top part, to make using your property more convenient for them.

People who never bother asking for favours don't actually see them as favours, but as enitrely reasonable actions to start with and then subsequently as their own rights.

There was a thread last year (I think), where OP and her husband lived in the second of three houses (as you approached them from the road) and there was a shared access for the use of all three properties. OP's husband was in the habit of parking his car outside their house all day to 'tinker' with it and thus completely blocking house 3's access to their own drive. His perspective was that there was loads of parking space out on the road itself (which apparently he was unable to use); if she (from house 3) really felt the need to use her drive, she could ask him to move, but if she knew that she was going to be coming and going a few times in the day, surely she should just park out on the road to avoid inconveniencing him by keep asking him to stop blocking her access! OP said she heard the neighbour harumphing "So much for buying a house with a drive" as she carried her bags back and forth to the road.

OP's husband thought that the neighbour was being very unreasonable by coming home at 11am one day (she was a nurse working shifts) and wanting to use her own drive when he had expected her to be out at work all day. He sounded like quite an aggressive piece of work, so the neighbour had taken to parking on the road instead of using her drive (presumably feeling bullied) and, because she had yielded by doing this, he then considered her in the wrong for wanting to stop the 'arrangement' which, to his mind, had been working well for everybody (well, for him anyway).

Are the neighbours generally at home for most of the day, OP (lockdown notwithstanding)? There do seem to be some people who think that, because a neighbour might be out for most of the day, they somehow forfeit the right to free access to/exclusive use of their own property 'because I'm at home all day and I need it, but it doesn't matter to you' and expect them to simply 'fit in' with what suits them. These are often the same kind of people who assume that, as homeowners, the street belongs to them, and if the neighbours who are 'only' tenants put their wheelie bin out half an hour early or have one single noisy party on a Saturday afternoon, they're taking outrageous liberties and it's straight on the phone to their landlord to 'report' them.

Ratbum · 15/10/2020 17:44

Strictly speaking, it's trespass (civil not criminal) plus wear&tear on your driveway. Yes, it would irritate me too. More so as they have 3 vehicles doing the wearing and tearing.

Ask them to stop, tell them its a car or house insurance issue if you can.

VintageStitchers · 15/10/2020 18:05

Sorry, but I can’t understand why you haven’t gone round and spoken to your neighbours and clarified that they’ve driving over your land? They might not realise or they think you’re not bothered but either way, you need to tell them to stop doing it.

Fuzzywig · 15/10/2020 18:28

OP you’ve mentioned a few times that you’re annoyed your neighbours do this without asking permission. Why haven’t you mentioned it to them? You say you smile and wave when you see them so they probably don’t think you have a problem with it.

They are CF’s though.

Jane1727 · 15/10/2020 18:40

I really couldn’t get wound up about this. If it bothers you talk to them though.

GreenShadow · 15/10/2020 18:47

Personally the driving across the lower part of the drive wouldn't bother me unduly. Why should they have to manoeuvre their cars round if there is an easier option which doesn't hurt anyone?
Actually driving on the bits nearer the house is a different matter of course, as is the builder.

I assume the layout is this sort of thing..

Another CF neighbour parking one...
exaltedwombat · 15/10/2020 18:51

How do you feel about people walking along the bit of pathway that you apparently own?

thedaytodayyesterday · 15/10/2020 18:59

But the only other option for them is for two of them to both go out, one drive the first car out of the drive then another to drive away before putting the first car back again? How long are their wheels touching your land for? A few seconds? It really doesn’t matter does it. I wish I had a massive drive . Or any drive. First world problems.

CakeRequired · 15/10/2020 19:00

Well you should have told them ages ago to stop doing it. Kind of missed your chance there. Just keep parking down the bottom, they'll get the message hopefully.

sadblackcat · 15/10/2020 19:41

Maybe they should have asked you first, but is it worth getting het up about. I think it would not be wise to fall out with your neighbours over something so petty. My neighbour and I used to do this all the time sometimes I went on their drive sometimes they came on mine. The day may come when you need to use their drive to get out. With all that is going on at the moment live and let live.

Loreleigh · 15/10/2020 20:13

Can't say I'd appreciate new neighbours just driving across my land/driveway, especially if they hadn't even had the decency to introduce themselves and ask for permission. I'd agree they are CF's.

We are about to move into our forever home and, similar to your drive, there is currently no physical boundary between our drive and the next-door-neighbour. While working on the place we couldn't help but notice how one neighbour cut across our drive to visit the elderly neighbour the other side - they have obviously been doing this routinely - we may well plant a hedge or put planters along our boundary line, because even though the neighbours are really nice it unnerves me to have someone walking right in front of my living room window. I guess we should be grateful that, so far, nobody has driven across our drive or tried to park on it!

Good luck dealing with your new CF neighbours - hope you find a solution

Nineteenfiddlytree · 15/10/2020 20:17

SoupDragon 14/10/20 @ 16.52

Grin
purplebunny2012 · 15/10/2020 20:25

TBH this one wouldn't bother me, at least nobody is parking on your drive. I cant see how it inconveniences anyone, unless they are getting close to your car when driving out.
You do wonder why they don't switch the cars so that the 2nd one is in front

Polyxena · 15/10/2020 20:43

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Nikori · 16/10/2020 01:54

I think because the driveway is separate from the OP's main driveway. If they were driving across her main driveway or driving across grass, I'd feel differently. The neighbor isn't blocking her in. They aren't causing any damage. They aren't causing any bother. And it saves the the hassle of moving their cars around. Even the Op says she would mind if they had just asked. So, what is the problem? Why get so wound up about this?

Localocal · 16/10/2020 12:49

Wouldn't bother me at all, I have to say, and I wouldn't make a thing of it, as long as they are not driving on the grass. But I get that it may be the principle to you.

not2impressed · 16/10/2020 14:27

Why are so many people OK with it. Its her bloody land. You'd be OK with neighbours casually using your garden etc too then? Behave

LonelyFromCorona · 16/10/2020 15:34

Fence or bollards/stones/heavy plant pots installed along the mid line of both sections of drive, hopefully the path is narrow enough that they couldn't get through to get round their 3rd parked car?

Just do it and don't even talk to them about it.

VinylDetective · 16/10/2020 19:23

@not2impressed

Why are so many people OK with it. Its her bloody land. You'd be OK with neighbours casually using your garden etc too then? Behave
Because it doesn’t affect her. It’s nothing like using a garden. Their wheels are on it for a few seconds. We’re not all territorial dogs in the manger so we wouldn’t bother about it. Some of us don’t sweat the small stuff, it’s too tiring.
not2impressed · 16/10/2020 19:57

Well obviously it does effect her because she's here and upset over it. She's entitled to be annoyed at people using her stuff without even asking 🙄

raddledoldmisanthropist · 16/10/2020 19:57

The inconsistency of MN does make me laugh sometimes.

I know, it's so random. It's as if all these posts are by completely different people.

Lillipops · 16/10/2020 20:23

Ok so we have been parking our car on the lower part of our driveway, today we were replacing the landing light fitting and had the blinds were open on the landing which is the only window on the side of the house. Our neighbour was standing on our drive under our window...WHY? I can't wait to get the driveway done and some form of fence etc put up like seriously get off my land! We are going to have to say something it's getting beyond a joke Angry

OP posts:
Polyxena · 16/10/2020 20:27

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Brahumbug · 16/10/2020 21:49

If they persist in driving over your drive, then they will eventually acquire a right to do so under the Prescriptions act. This will affect the value of your house and you will not be able to do anything about it. Stop it NOW!

Bluespirit17 · 16/10/2020 22:13

I agree this would annoy me Op. Maybe not the wear and tear, but trying to come home and park on my drive to find another car pulling out on me on the wrong side. Def cf to let the builders use it!