Asking people to use my preferred name?

[Biancadelrioisback]

My first name is quite long and old fashioned so for the last 17 years I've been using a shortened version.
At work, everyone knows me and uses my shortened name (even clients) except for one colleague who refuses. She likes to use 'proper' names for people and refers to me by long name plus middle name as it 'sounds better'.
I've addressed this with her multiple times and with my manager as it royalty fucked up a negotiation with a client as they felt like they were being passed around.
All they say to me is "well it is your name so..."
I mean, yes, it is my name, a name I didn't choose. I ask to be called X instead. No one else has a problem!
My manager even suggested that I legally change my name. I certainly don't want to do that as it is a family name, it means so much to my parents and I quite like having a name and then a 'formal' name.
So AIBU to keep insisting they use the short version? I rarely answer to the long version as no one ever uses that.

@LUZON

I really wouldn’t bother with any of the pa type suggestions. It will end up making you look as bad as her.

Exactly

Oh, and programmers who insist on recapitalising peoples names ... So MacDonald becomes Macdonald.

isn't it the other way round? (I have personal experience of this )

@WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausagerolls yours is my favourite suggestion so far.

By what symbol to use??!

Hmm, it would have to be something really random and unlike anything else ever seen or recognised. It couldn't just be something as simple as, say, an emoji, as people would just call you Smily Face, Thumbs Up or Curly Poo and that would become your de facto name. Alternatively, how about ROFL? Must always be all in capitals when in written form and anybody calling you Rolf gets a mandatory atomic Chinese burn until they retract and apologise profusely.

The simplest method would probably be to toddle along to your local zoo and ask the keeper nicely if you couldn't just pop a brush in one of the elephants' trunks for a minute and hold some paper up to it. Whatever Jumbo produces is now your new name. You could copyright it and reproduce it on posters, mugs and t-shirts for sale to the general public. Sell a t-shirt (mate's rates) to all of your colleagues except for Laughing Girl and they can just put it on and point to it when they need to attract your attention - very straightforward indeed. Just make sure you don't forget your valued co-creator and be certain to drop by with a large bag of gratitude buns every couple of weeks.

Wtf is wrong with her?! You get to choose which name you get called, not her. I wouldn’t be able to stop myself embarrassing her in a group call by saying ‘how long have we worked together and you still can’t get my name right? Do you have a problem?’

programmers who think they know best and write code that refuses to accept an apostrophe in an email address.

Or who can't code a surname field on a database to be text only so that certain names don't convert to 0 or 1.

She sounds like an arse- start calling her by a name she doesn’t really like and certainly doesn’t use... obs May have to include her ‘real’ name as part of it to gain her attention

HR surely have to do something. If there are people being able to enforce being called 'they' rather than he, she, surely you can make them enforce someone to call you by a shortened version of your name? At least it's your name and not some stupid made up look at me concept!

I have a long old fashioned name too and have had this coz apparently it's a pretty name and more romantic.

With the last colleague I had who insisted on using it I got a few people to start looking really confused and say "who?" every time, once she had to start explaining who she was talking about she started using my preffered name.

But like people who shorten name like Rebecca, Samantha, Danielle etc

I worked with a woman who was quirky but in a slightly contrived way. She'd occasionally call someone by the wrong name and when corrected, would continue to use the wrong name as tO her they looked like a "Simon" rather than a "John". She was reported to HR

Whatever Jumbo produces is now your new name. You could copyright it

Er, surely copyright is Jumbos ?

I can't remember how that case went a few years back concerning the chimp who took the selfie - there's a precedent!

Any update OP? Has she got it right yet?

@Biancadelrioisback I can sympathise, my own name is unusual, but luckily my colleagues accept my preffered nickname.

So yes, another word with your manager, who is failing as a manager. Once you had gone to him/her originally, he should have had a short word with your disrespectful colleague, telling her to use your preferred name only.

HR are wrong as well, for the reasons already stated.

So, an email to colleague, copied to manager and HR, telling her to use your preferred name, and adding in that her refusal to do so is already impacting on the business (giving a brief description of the problems caused by her using your full name with your customer) is what I'd do.

As for IT, I can't see any reason why they can't change your email. Bollocks to it being a security reason. My work email is simply [email protected] and I know that work can change our emails if needed.