Homesick DD locked down in uni room

[RollercoasterRita]

We took our DD to university in the middle of September. She was excited and full of hope. Now due to someone in her halls of residence being tested positive for COVID, her whole floor has been locked down in their tiny rooms with food parcels being delivered to outside their doors. Totally understand the precautions which need to be taken, but my baby girl is lonely and scared and homesick and I just want to drive up there and get her. I feel so helpless....

Depending how she is, I would go and get her.
But I’d prepare for us all to isolate for 2 weeks on her return.
So fill the fridge Up, fill the car up with fuel so you don’t stop on the way back.

I was listening to a uni councillor the other day on the radio and she said that that normally they would be busy with students just struggling adjusting to student life in a normal setting, students that were missing their families, anxiety at living with strangers, anxiety over oncoming work ect..

She said she was really worried because now these students are being isolated, there was no where they could go for help, couldn’t do their courses on line as some needed to be in present, no money for online deliveries, cooped up with people they may not get on with.

If this was my dd I’d go and get her. They shouldn’t have promised these young adults were ok to come back, took the money for rent and courses, not all students have parents able to send them money, some have to work and are now locking them in their rooms.

Awful business

HottoCold

"Millions have been in isolation for months"

Presumably they arent limited to tiny bedrooms.
Lockdown in your own home is entirely different to lockdown in a hall of residence.

@2bazookas Absolutely - if she's old enough to be at university, she's not your baby girl.

@2bazookas

You're doing her no favours by treating her like a baby.

Encourage her to behave like an adult, to be calm and resilient, get on with her course work.

This again.

Formative years and experiences. We must stop trying to rob young people of the opportunity to live through interesting times.

Mine too OP, bloody nightmare. I’m not even sure if the parcels I’m sending are getting through to her yet.
It’s all very well for some of you saying suck it up but they are stuck in a strange city, with no gardens (her window only opens a crack) with people she’s only known for a week. The worst part is, it could happen again straight after.

What’s scary is that Manchester uni have security guards preventing people leaving. That’s not on. They have been detained

if another then tests positive they will all have to isolate for another 14 days. In theory, he could be in almost permanent isolation.

This is crazy.

Incarcerating people like this inhumane. Even criminals in jail are allowed out for exercise!

Bring her home after the two weeks are up.

They are not allowed out of their block. Presumably no one is stopping them leaving their actual rooms ( unless they are all ensuite).

They are in their late teens/early 20’s. If they can’t come up with creative ways to have fun there is no hope. They have study and online facilities. They’ve got online shopping. They’ve got each other They don’t even have to get out bed.

On a serious note I would be concerned by pregnacy more than anything else.

Wildswim
Exactly.
There are 300 students in our DDs block.
It could take months before there is no one testing positive.
This is not about a 2 week finite lockdown.
Its ongoing.
They could spend months in a room.
I am sure this must infringe on civil liberties.

You still there OP?

[quote intheenddoesitreallymatter]@OperationallySound

Then surely you can understand how debilitatingly dangerous this must be on their mental health.

I'm sorry your child has had a rough time with covid, that must have been very difficult for all of you. But how would they have coped with covid locked in a room without support?

You were able to stay up with your child and look after them. OP's daughter is stuck in a new place with no support network around them. As I'm assuming is the poor kid who's tested positive who is not allowed to go home or have any human contact with anyone. If it were any other illness from the flu to bloody anthrax then you would be allowed to go and get them. Why not with covid? You're picking them up and taking them straight home.

The rules regarding universities are inconsistent, ill-thought and downright unfair. Are they in a household together? No, because they aren't allowed to mix. Are they considered single households that are allowed to form a support bubble with another? No, because they have housemates. Can they apply for tests? No, because they aren't actually displaying symptoms nor have they necessarily gone into contact with the person testing positive. It's forced isolation and it's ridiculous. Could you spend 2 weeks in a bedroom and not be literally climbing the walls? I couldn't.

It's bloody barbaric and inhumane and, as a parent, you surely can't disagree.[/quote]
Er, no I wasn't with her actually.... She had to cope without any family. I'm not even in the same country. Sorry if that doesn't fit your narrative

You are missing the point. That by collecting her child, the OP would place herself and any other family members living at home at risk. And yes, if I had to isolate to prevent the spread of covid, I would.

I'm not sure some people understand what quarantine is. It's not something we should be opting out of just because we fancy a weekend at our parents' house.

I agree with others encouraging resilience, calmness, creativity and lots of communication.

RevealAll
No actually, the wifi keeps crashing due to the weight of everyone trying to use it.
They cant accept deliveries of online orders (assuming someone else orders for them!) either as the porters lodge is closed.
I am ignoring your comment about pregnancy because you are being ridiculous.

The students were not even told or prepared about the lockdown. One of them said they were getting ready to go out and looked out the window and police and security were outside preventing people from leaving.

This is really troubling. It’s outrageous really but people just swallow up - ‘it’s for your own benefit and every one else’s’

Crazy times

Also have a DS in catered halls, but not locked down. I fully expect them to be at some point though. I think there is no getting away from the fact that they will mostly have been exposed to it by the end of this term, I'm just hoping they get through it okay and gain some immunity. Because the vaccine won't be for that demographic if/when it arrives. I would have them continue to go to canteens, encourage them to watch out for each other, do lectures online, but keep them off public transport and out of lecture halls etc. It's brutal and none of us want our 18 year olds to have to go through any of this, but here we all are. Isolating in a single room is a step too far because they'll only have to isolate again when this two weeks is over. If that was happening I'd rather get him back home and we'll all three isolate (his DSD and I) with him for two weeks.

@RevealAll

They are not allowed out of their block. Presumably no one is stopping them leaving their actual rooms ( unless they are all ensuite).

They are in their late teens/early 20’s. If they can’t come up with creative ways to have fun there is no hope. They have study and online facilities. They’ve got online shopping. They’ve got each other They don’t even have to get out bed.

On a serious note I would be concerned by pregnacy more than anything else.

Who is gonna get her pregnant when she's not even allowed out of her room? God?

Sorry, posted in my lunch hour and have been at work since. She will get through this, but yes she has only just turned 18, and is in catered halls, so literally not allowed out of her room. We have sent parcels, but she is not allowed out of her room to get them from the student post room, and we have phoned, zoomed etc. Thank you for all your comments. Like some of you, I feel this situation could perpetuate for weeks. She has no major anxieties or mental health issues and she will survive, as some of you rightly say, it is just heartbreaking to hear her be so homesick and isolated.

Can someone deliver the parcels when they are delivering the food?

@HotToCold

The people saying ‘Fuck the rules’

Really?

Millions of people have been in isolation for months and months

Im going into my 7th month!!!!!

This is 2 weeks!!!

This is your choice you genius. OP's daughter is not allowed to leave her room.

Surely someone in student welfare should be thinking about parcels being delivered to students at this time

Can they sit in their doorways and speak to their neighbours, wearing masks and making sure windows are open

Reading this thread is making me lose faith in humanity

Surely someone in student welfare should be thinking about parcels being delivered to students at this time I would actually be making a fuss about this with student welfare, or her personal tutor who will pass it on to administrative staff. There should be a way you can deliver the post, with masks. They need to do better on that front.

My Dgd indunated with work to do. She doesn't have time to mope😁