To be fuming with this teacher.

[Thedarksideofthemoon30]

Yesterday it was my ds 11th birthday. He went to school so happy.

When he came out he looked so sad. He said the teacher had told him to shut up.

I asked him why she said that and apparently he asked her a maths question during the maths lesson.

We talked and he was still uspet but wouldn’t tel
Me why.

I had 4 mums message me last night asking if he was ok, it turns out another mum had put a post on the class Facebook group saying the teacher screamed at the class that they are all stupid, told ds to shut up and called him dumb.

I asked ds today and he cried saying he felt embarrassed. Apparently this teacher is a support teacher and when the main teacher is in the class she’s normal but as soon as he leaves she’s nasty and mean.

I’m going to ring the school this morning and so are the other mums.

I’m so upset for ds.

Report to the head and have it looked into. The fact other parents have contacted you shows to me that it wasn’t just a flippant comment by the TA due to children playing up. You need to get to the bottom of it and find out what went on. Children are really suffering at the moment and a lot are full of worry about covid so don’t need extra stress from horrible comments. I hope your child is ok

@Usernamerequired

Report to the head and have it looked into. The fact other parents have contacted you shows to me that it wasn’t just a flippant comment by the TA due to children playing up. You need to get to the bottom of it and find out what went on. Children are really suffering at the moment and a lot are full of worry about covid so don’t need extra stress from horrible comments. I hope your child is ok

So are teachers! We are walking around schools to keep bubbles separate with heavy equipment. We are there to teach in spite of the risks we are exposed to. Remember the illness is mild if at all dangerous to children. There are all types of teachers, vulnerable ones, old ones, ones with vulnerable family members. We are all in this together. Also no, support staff are NOT supposed to be left in charge of a class. They deal with individual pupils. There is massive staff absence due to teachers also having a life with family that may be isolating. We are not going to bring in random staff so it possible a TA may have been bought in. Honestly speaking this witch hunt seems like bullying behaviour. You have take a child's version and I know how kids play on things and misinterpret things. Instead of getting to the bottom of it and giving this TA the benefit of the doubt until things have been investigated you have decided you want her sacked.

Stop making a mother who is already stressed even more stressed and advise her to calmly investigate things. Stressing her with all this will not help her. She will just go in all wound up and it won't be good.

When I was at school one of our teachers would shout very aggressively at students and would make very mean personal comments, no one ever believed the students as he was very pleasant/jovial etc outside of his classroom. One day something came up about hobbies that people had done over the weekend, we were year seven so only young, one girl who was quite shy and quiet said she'd been bowling with her family and she really enjoyed it. His comment to her in front of a class of thirty was 'Bowling? What were you the ball?' , she was quite overweight. She went bright red and later cried at break time. Her parents complained, we were all asked to make statements and the school decided it was a 'witch-hunt' (but a class of eleven year olds....) and made up because there's no way a teacher would say that. He absolutely did, and I heard him say worse over the years. We also had a teacher who would shout so loudly in people's faces you could see his spit hit them.
I don't care what stress teachers are under you don't take it out on children.

@KarlKennedysDurianFruit

When I was at school one of our teachers would shout very aggressively at students and would make very mean personal comments, no one ever believed the students as he was very pleasant/jovial etc outside of his classroom. One day something came up about hobbies that people had done over the weekend, we were year seven so only young, one girl who was quite shy and quiet said she'd been bowling with her family and she really enjoyed it. His comment to her in front of a class of thirty was 'Bowling? What were you the ball?' , she was quite overweight. She went bright red and later cried at break time. Her parents complained, we were all asked to make statements and the school decided it was a 'witch-hunt' (but a class of eleven year olds....) and made up because there's no way a teacher would say that. He absolutely did, and I heard him say worse over the years. We also had a teacher who would shout so loudly in people's faces you could see his spit hit them. I don't care what stress teachers are under you don't take it out on children.

Erm if you read the rest of my posts I have said it's not ok. You are giving one example. That should have reported. And I'm not denying teachers say unacceptable things...however there has been no investigation and yet you people coming along saying ' sack her' how is that correct! And yes teachers are stressed because we to deal with constant false accusations we are scrutinised by parents and higher up alike. If we are constantly stressed then your children will not be getting the quality education they deserve, so maybe back off a little?

Just read through all the OP's posts and I have to say, the excuse given by the school is just that, an excuse and a pretty shit one too. If the teacher has indeed called your son 'dumb', that alone is a completely unprofessional and unacceptable way to communicate with a child. I'd be asking for an urgent meeting with the head to raise concerns. I've worked in nurseries and schools for over ten years and from a professional point if view, this supply should be in a different job altogether by the sounds of it. I'm sorry your child was on the receiving end of someone like this who clearly shouldn't be working in a classroom.

Email the head and cc in the head of governors. Forget about the birthday, do mention other parents also confirmed what happened

I hope those that are witnessing these arseholes are whistleblowing. Yea I know, they continue and help bully you out, but at least if your persistent enough, insist on paper trails, they get dragged out with you.

Needless to say teachers are stressed. I am not undermining the work they do

But we are talking about little kids, not on taking stress out on them

A TA at my local school has form for this until she was made to resign. Not a female with the first name starting with S is it, it would be a huge unlucky strange coincidence but you never know.

@Bl3ss3dm0m

morethanmeetstheeye, you are the only person on here that has said what the OP really does need to do, which makes me believe that you are completely genuine, you have pointed out that a copy of the letter to the head needs to be copied to the Chair of the School Governers. The school Governers should always be included in complaints, they tend to make sure that any issues are addressed properly.

Thank you. I'm 100% genuine and very much a working teacher/SLT member.

What has happened needs dealing with through the correct channels for many reasons, including both the welfare of the child/children and the member of staff.

I know it sounds harsh saying that a pandemic is nothing to do with professionalism.... but the thing is - we have to maintain our professional standards and this behaviour has to be addressed.

I really hope the OP's child had a lovely rest of his birthday and it's being sorted

@RepeatSwan - I agree with what you say. OP, if this does not bring satisfaction, I would contact the school governors and/or the local education department. Children go to school to learn not to be humiliated or upset because the teaching staff cannot be professional.

I was a TA for 16 years. I’ve seen some terrible behaviour from children (I worked in a PRU for the last 4 years), but I have never, EVER called a child stupid, dumb, or said that their question was stupid. There are ways of dealing with silly behaviour which don’t involve belittling children.

I have seen appalling behaviour from staff though; the worst being a deputy head in a primary, who was an out an out bully to both staff and children. I reported her to (her friend) the head on several occasions, and was ridiculed, as I was “inexperienced in comparison”. Bollocks- I’m a mum, a foster mum, an adoptive mum, and an intelligent TA3. I know about child development and behaviour, and I’m competent with regard to primary literacy and numeracy. That woman was simply a nasty bully.

Put everything in writing, OP, it has to be dealt with if you do.

If the staff member was that stressed then they shouldn't be in the classroom alone with the pupils.
Either the school needs to stop using this TA as a teacher or they need to be signed off. The school have funds for staff MH. Hope all these ta's are also getting paid more, if not get your union involved.

If this happened to someone in their work environment HR would be quickly brought in. Why should it be different because they are kids?

That was a teaching assistant not a support teacher. There is a difference.

My son had a teacher who was vile. She was aware he was being assessed for additional needs.

He was 7 and doing a presentation and after his presentation called him to her desk where she screamed at him for fidgeting, he cried so she shouted even louder that he wasn't to do that and was a disgrace. He was distracting the rest of the class with his sobbing and he was to get out her class. He went to the toilet and the TA comforted him.

The TA in the class who backed up what my son and other parents had told me.

I kicked up fuck. This wasn't the first time I had been into the school about her. She was present at a meeting called and went on to say how annoying my son was, how he is a distraction and ruins her day. The deputy head apologised profusely for the way the teacher went on in the meeting and that that's not how they run their school and will be dealt with.

We removed my son from the school after the meeting. The teacher was a total bitch and I have no idea if she is still there.

@sashh

LolaSmiles

I've done a lot of supply.

A year 9 once asked me, "Miss do you take it up the arse?" Not something I thought I'd be asked in a maths class. I ignored but passed it on to the appropriate person, I bet he claimed he was, 'just asking a question'.

It's also amazing that if you ask for a number between 1-100 they always pick 69.

My best supply classes (other than long term) are when I catch someone out early on. Eg ask everyone to sit in their places according to the seating plan (they don't know I have a copy). Once all seated I start the register. One name in and I can often say, "you get a 10 min detention / a consequence / pick school's behaviour policy"

Then they have 20 seconds to sit in their actual allocated seat. It's a sort of, "OK you caught us out, but it's a fair cop".

blissfulllife

That's terrible your poor dd.

@sashh I’m so shocked to read that question a year 9 asked. Genuinely interested how teachers are supposed to handle things like that? My first thought was, surely you drag them to the school office, call the parents and ask the brat to repeat what they’d just said. Plus some kind of detention. In reality, is anything done? Surely by ignoring it, the rest of the kids think they can get away with anything?

shocked? I once was in a class and a young lady reached for her phone to inform her "partner" he had given her crabs. Oh happy day.

randomer that’s just an embarrassment to herself though. Big difference from being rude to a teacher.

I’m so shocked to read that question a year 9 asked

This was standard behaviour at my school as a teenager, surely things have long been this way?

Hahaha kids at my place only get 30 minute detention if they tell a teacher to fuck off, in the face.

Not just muttering as they stomp off....
Proper telling you to eff off.

a year 9 once asked me, "Miss do you take it up the arse?" Not something I thought I'd be asked in a maths class. I ignored but passed it on to the appropriate person, I bet he claimed he was, 'just asking a question

How did you not respond

No, but your mum told me she does to save the world from having another you.

@SingaporeSlinky, It was embarassing for other students who heard it.

randomer ok, yes, for the other students too. But you see my point, surely, that there’s a world of difference. As a teacher, I would feel like the girl was being disruptive maybe, and tell her to stop, but wouldn’t necessarily punish her. But by asking me as a teacher a question like ‘do you take it up the arse?’ I would absolutely think that deserved a punishment, for lack of respect.
My point was, what are teachers allowed to do in that case?

That absolutely wasn’t standard at my school, anyway, and I don’t think it should be. It won’t stop if kids know they can get away with speaking to adults like that.

@SingaporeSlinky, both " conversations" are vile. Standards are erroded to a point where school would be almost unrecogniseable to many. I also believe bullying is endemic.

Amongst the majority of fab school staff, there are definitely shit teachers and TAs out there who shouldnt be allowed near kids.
DH is a teacher (a good one!) and I've worked in schools and we have both seen some awful staff.
Notably a TA who very quietly told a 7 year old girl with a learning disability, who had spilled a drink, that she was "a fucking little bitch". No one heard but me and the child.
Even if the child complained who would believe her?
I complained, not sure I was fully believed though. The TA is still there, 15 years later.