AIBU to think a job is a job at the moment and to take what you can get for now?

[LastGoldenDaysOfSummer]

Friend's grandson has been applying for jobs since May. He graduated with a 2:2 in June. He hasn't even been offered an interview for his field, which isn't surprising with the Covid Effect.

His mum is a single parent in a low paid job but he is refusing to give her any money from his benefits. He is always complaining about not having any money and tries to borrow from the rest of the family.

My friend knows someone who runs a nursing home and she has offered him weekend shifts in the kitchen and laundry. He says it's beneath him. His mum said it was just to help out until he got a job he wanted. Huge row and she has said that if he doesn't start contributing he will have to leave because she can't afford to keep him and his siblings.

My friend is panicking because she's afraid he'll turn up in her doorstep.

AIBUto think he should take the shifts for now and keep trying for another job?

@Onetwothree456 UC isn't all or nothing (supposedly)

People in work who are working part time, can still claim.

Good update op

unless I’ve missed something- I haven’t seen in any of the replies one single poster who has done any care home/ laundry/ or kitchen work

I think you did, iirc myself and at least one other said they've done this type of work.

I'm an ex nurse who mainly worked in elderly care but when I wanted extra money (for Christmas, holidays etc) I took shifts working in the kitchens too

I also worked in restaurant and cafe kitchens prior to getting my nursing degree, and I've done laundry work too.

I don't think that's inverted snobbery that's realism!

The degree alone doesn't make him better than others which at a point he seemed to think.

He should definitely be doing something. Either improving his employability with further training or taking a job he can get. If he had a 1st class Stem degree from Cambridge then I would be inclined to agree its not worth taking weekend shifts, but a 2:2 isn't great and will rule him out for a large proportion of graduate roles.

Weekend shifts would be ideal. He'd be free to interview and apply for jobs in the week (or do further training) while earning money and contributing to his keep.

@morwenna2

One thing I will say though: the final comment from OP “He’s not a bad lad at heart, just above himself because he has a degree.” Inverted snobbery alive & well there.

Not sure what you mean by inverted snobbery. Did you mean to be so rude? My degree is a redbrick one and a lot better than his, as it happens. Which is one reason why my friend asked for my advice. And, no I'm not the Gran. You seem to be making many wrong assumptions.

And yes, poor lad, surrounded by people with that attitude. They are not proud of him, which they should be. Let’s hope he escapes ending up in that bucket with the other crabs.

Of course everyone was proud of him when he got his degree. Less so when he expected his mother to keep him when he's capable of working.

But carry on making wrong assumptions if it makes you happy. Some people are just naturally contrary for the sake of it.

But it’s still a degree & shows he was bright enough to go to uni in the first place.
From my experience, going to uni doesn't equal bright... Which is sad because how people are pushed into it, they just end up miserable.

“He’s not a bad lad at heart, just above himself because he has a degree.” Inverted snobbery alive & well there. And yes, poor lad, surrounded by people with that attitude.
Well since he thought that how is that inverted snobbery. And yes. Poor him for being surrounded by people who think able adult should... Contribute. Horrible.

Op, it's great to hear he is reconsidering! Let's face it. He is not a baby anymore. He is an adult man. Fingers crossed it all goes well. Sometimes people need a bit of a kick in the arse to see what needs to be done. He can still search for job. Keep an eye on LinkedIn. If not for jobs, at least for the fun of reading the ridiculous stories people try to pass as real one😂

The gran does not need to take him in. That's just moving the problem onto a diffrent family member, pointless. If he gets chucked out by his mum he will have to find a room in a sharehouse like other graduates and pay rent, which will probably force him to try and get some kind of work anyway.

Also I agree that going to university doesn't necessarily equal bright. Without meaning to be rude, this young man might be bright, or he might be a bit thick with poor language skills...sadly you can enter and emerge from 'uni' in that state now.

This boy sounds a right lazy prick. Sorry to say it. Surely everybody knows (this boy included) that if you get a Desmond Twotwo no one is going to offer you a job in your field, and definitely not now unless maybe you studied covid nursing or delivery driving. He has been dossing around while in Uni, not bothering to study, and now he wants to continue doing it in adult life. Someone needs to make him wake up and face the consequences of his actions.

And just to add to my harsh comment s from earlier. I was the first in my family to get a degree and got zero help to do so from my parents as they said it's a waste of time, worked up to 3 jobs in every school holiday to pay my way through uni (bar work, number punching, telesurveying, holiday cover in an office, shop work, washing buses, you name it, I've done it!), and studied hard to get into a good uni, get a 1st and go onto a grad program.

@LastGoldenDaysOfSummer - I was not assuming you were the grandma - I was asking if you were.
And as for finding my inverted snobbery comment rude, well, I’m sorry you were offended, but saying he has got above himself because he has a degree seems to be unsupportive & critical of him because he has one - that is what I meant by inverted snobbery. And it’s only when you were called out on that comment that you revealed you have a degree yourself & a much better one than the lad does. Which makes your comment about “getting above himself” even more curious.

[quote morwenna2]@LastGoldenDaysOfSummer - I was not assuming you were the grandma - I was asking if you were.
And as for finding my inverted snobbery comment rude, well, I’m sorry you were offended, but saying he has got above himself because he has a degree seems to be unsupportive & critical of him because he has one - that is what I meant by inverted snobbery. And it’s only when you were called out on that comment that you revealed you have a degree yourself & a much better one than the lad does. Which makes your comment about “getting above himself” even more curious.[/quote]
I wonder why you are so nit-picky? It isn't healthy.

"getting above himself" is a common phrase in these parts and was meant in a semi-humorous way. Everyone else seemed to get it. There was nothing to be called out on, really. Do you spend your time looking for posts you can nit-pick at for trivial reasons? It certainly looks that way.

YANBU, he is extremely entitled and will find it very hard to get a graduate job with a 2.2 and no work experience.

My DS finished this year with a first in a STEM subject, and plenty of work experience including a year out in the aviation industry. He knows he will not be joining the aviation industry - his dream - any time soon. The niche business he worked for in his YII has made 300+ redundant. He is though applying for other professional/graduate roles, whilst working in retail.

He applied for retail jobs not long into lockdown (applied for anything going - which was not much at start of April - to do alongside his final studies, as he knew if he waited a few months there would be nothing) and luckily got one interview and was successful. He has already been promoted and works more than his scheduled hours every week.

He is realistic enough, as are we, to know that any job at this time is better than nothing. He may climb the ladder in retail initially, then move on to something closer to his interests, but he has at least got work and is earning.

Interestingly we have a friend who has mocked and sneered at both of my 2 for doing retail (it’s beneath her kids) - she is not sneering at the moment 😀

We know a very bright guy who got a 2:2 last year (Which was blamed on his lecturers ☹️), has never worked a day in his life, spent the year in his bedroom teaching himself a profession and hoping to get into a graduate scheme. Deluded doesn’t quite describe how he and his mum think. He has turned down retail jobs, but then his mum has had and walked out of them as they are beneath her...not worked professionally for 20+ yrs but expects better than NMW as she has 2 degrees. Breathtaking entitlement.

For anyone looking, now is the time that retailers recruit Christmas staff. DS store already been interviewing, DD (also in retail on gap year) initially got Xmas job and was interviewed in early November.

I have a first. I worked in a fish and chip shop.

First couple of jobs after graduating
Not living at home with parents

2 jobs
Walked between each job
Day - hospital laundry
Evening -takeaway food delivery (free food at end of each shift)

I did get onto a graduate entry job eventually. However, like my other graduate friends, we worked in a variety of different jobs during university & after.

Some of us have obtained further qualifications
Some of us have retrained for different careers

I realize that the Covid virus has changed things with the job market

However, I find it so unappealing to have young healrhy people with no enthusiasm, no drive

@LastGoldenDaysOfSummer No I assure you I don’t look out for posts to nitpick over - more important things to do with my time. But I do think it has been uncalled for going after me on a personal level saying I have been rude, assuming, contrary, nitpicking etc - just because I put forward a slightly different view to yours. You have 97% happily agreeing with you so I wonder at your bothering to react to what I wrote? I clearly touched a nerve. Anyway, real life calls.

Sorry a 2.2 is not a bad grade!! I got a 2,1 but my friend got a 2.2 and got a much better job than me after graduating so dont be so narrow minded! Yes maybe he should take the job, or just anything for now, perhaps he can email companies to ask?

@Busymum45

Sorry a 2.2 is not a bad grade!! I got a 2,1 but my friend got a 2.2 and got a much better job than me after graduating so dont be so narrow minded! Yes maybe he should take the job, or just anything for now, perhaps he can email companies to ask?

Depends on which subject and what do you want to do after. If it's really competitive field, 2:2 is a bad grade unless you have some other absolutely amazing qualities.