Trying until having a baby boy

[TunMahla]

An acquaintance of mine basically kept trying to have a baby boy after having had only daughters previously (4 of them!). I personally find it shocking that there can be such a preference for male progeny in this day and age. Note, I am talking about clear preference for a boy, not trying for another child of a different gender.

YABU: it is normal to keep trying pregnancy after pregnancy to get a baby boy
YANBU: it is weird as hell to keep trying pregnancy after pregnancy to get a baby boy

I read once that it is actually more
Common for parents of
Boys to carry on until they get a girl rather than the other way around.

I think people who do this are both extremely selfish and not very bright -- obviously there are no guarantees you will eventually achieve the right sex.

To be fair I think it works both ways: I think trying for a girl is just as bad.

Did you really dig into the depths of this "acquaintances" reasoning why they want a boy to know it isn't just so they have at least one of each, or are you projecting something here?

Yes I think it is mad to keep trying after 4 dc, but keeping trying after 3 is okay! If it wasn't my dm would have stopped at 3 boys and I wouldn't be here!!!!!

Is it a cultural thing ? Some cultures place huge importance on having a boy. I had 3 boys then a girls and people assumed I just kept going to get a girl. This was completely inaccurate, the last two were nor planned.

I know of a lady who has 5 daughters as she kept trying for a boy. And her eldest daughter has 3 boys after trying for a girl.

I'm the youngest of 3 and we went girl boy girl. So i don't think they cared what I was.

I knew a lady, who had 5 girls and then eventually had a boy. They stopped after they got the boy so sm guessing that's what they were hoping for, after so many girls. Not that it should matter either way, as long as everyone is happy and healthy that's all what counts.
What's really interesting is her eldest daughter went on to have either 4 or 5 girls. Then had a boy and now that I do not go on Facebook anymore, I am not sure if she has had any more children or not.

My Dh and I are expecting a 5th child. We dont mind what gender it is , as long as its healthy that's all what counts. Turns out we are expecting our 3rd girl.... God is great.

YABU - it’s none of your business how many children someone else has and why.

I also know couple who kept going to get a girl after 6 boys.The seventh child was a girl.

@Whatthebloodyell

I read once that it is actually more Common for parents of Boys to carry on until they get a girl rather than the other way around.

It's very culturally specific. According to this (generally quite upsetting; the central case study in it is a prime example of someone who should have had no children at all, boys or girls) article:

Much of the evidence that Americans preferentially choose girls is anecdotal, as no larger body tracks gender selection procedures. But data from Google show that “how to have a girl” is searched three times as often in the United States as “how to have a boy.” Many fertility doctors say that girls are the goal for 80 percent of gender selection patients. A study published in 2009 by the online journal Reproductive Biomedicine Online found Caucasian-Americans preferentially select females through PGD 70 percent of the time. Those of Indian or Chinese descent largely chose boys.

slate.com/technology/2012/09/sex-selection-in-babies-through-pgd-americans-are-paying-to-have-daughters-rather-than-sons.html

I have two boys. I wanted a girl but no way would I continue trying to get one. I think it’s irresponsible when the world can’t cope with any more people.

My first born was a son. He will inherit my empire, reinforce my patriarchal views into the future, and take care of the women folk. Perhaps I'm embellishing a tad, but this is basically what my BIL said to me once, I kid you not! People have shit in their heads, what ya gonna do?

@SBTLove I'm the same but 3 DS and one DD, people always assume DD is the youngest but she's not she's the third! It's a very strange way to think if you ask me!

“Weird” as hell to start a thread about it

I don’t know why people don’t just go for sex selection. It costs around $600,000 to raise a child. Churning out multiple children of the ‘undesired’ sex until you get the one you want (if indeed that ever happens) does not make financial sense, as well as the burden on the environment of all those extra children.

@DeltaFlyer wow, it went girl boy girl.

We actually had a pattern going. Our eldest is boy, then girl, then boy, then girl. And now our 3rd little girl had broken the pattern going haha

I quite like the idea of having at least one of each. Presently, I like the idea of having a big family too. Although I have the mentality of "Well I'll have 3 or 4 and hopefully there will be boys and girls". If I have 4 boys or 4 girls I think I'll draw the line there though.

You have to be careful what you wish for though. I heard of one couple who had 2 boys and then decided to try for a girl. They got four girls all at once in the form of quads.

My best friend at secondary school was the eighth daughter of a very traditional Pakistani family. The only reason they didn't carry on after they had her was that her mother had a very complicated delivery and needed a hysterectomy. My friend was acutely aware that she and her older sisters were a disappointment, and that sons were hugely prized.

It wasn't a happy family.

It makes me wonder if they have the ‘wrong sex’ is that child wanted? Obviously not!

@thepeopleversuswork

What's even more ridiculous is different positions help you conceive the gender you want....
Huhhhhh

@TableFlowerss

It makes me wonder if they have the ‘wrong sex’ is that child wanted? Obviously not!

People always insist that they still love the children they have 'just as much' while describing weeping throughout pregnancy, always feeling like there's something missing, etc. Which makes me feel like actually, no, you don't really love them as much I love my child, if I'm honest.

I have three sons, everyone assumes we have three as we were 'trying for a girl'. We weren't trying! Ds3 was a huge surprise. Lots of people assume we will have a fourth to 'try for a girl'. Lots thought I would be disappointed when we found out ds3's sex at the anomaly scan. People can be so weird!

My grandfather had a farmer friend who desperately wanted a boy to carry on the farm - they had 11 children, all girls so they decided to sell the farm - wife got pregnant again and had a boy but in his words it was too late 🙁

There is nothing wrong with wanting a boy and a girl. Its their choice. You're right...

People judge me for having 5 children. It's my life. I am happy both my husband and I work and we have healthy and cared for children. They all get equal time and love each other. That's all what counts

Plenty of people do it for girls, not just boys.

Personally I wanted a son and I got one - haven't had any more kids!

I knew a family that did this. They had 4 or 5 girls but wanted a boy to carry on the family name. They got said boy. He is in a very loving relationship with another gay man and no plans to adopt a child.