To think why this is one of the reasons we have an obesity problem.

[Delamalama]

Friend on facebook has put about 2 stone on this past year. She posted a selfie the other day with a statement saying how she's finally learning to love herself, she may not be perfect but it's her body and she loves it!!! She's on the verge of being obese and suffers with chronic backache. Of course she had comments saying 'looking good hun' 'you beauty!' Etc.

I've noticed quite a lot of younger ones doing this 'be fat and proud' crap.

Am I wrong to think that this along with many other things is why we have an obesity problem.

This thread has highlighted how we need a lot of work to explain better to our people obesity and various solutions available via NHS to tackle it.
We can spend millions on shipping companies that have no ships, we can spend millions on apps that don’t work at all, we can also spend huge amount of publicity campaigns for the ego massage campaign of Boris on Brexit, but we can’t design an effective anti-obesity campaign that can save billions for NHS and increase our nations’s productivity and mental health.

Which in this instance is between a lavish Sunday lunch and Monday's breakfast, which will be a return to fruit and (unsweetened) yoghurt.

I’ve had an under active thyroid for over 20 years. People with this condition are given thyroid tablets, meaning you have just as much thyroxine in your body as the next person, just that it comes via tablets. So you then have no excuse for weight gain. If I eat too much I gain weight, but if I diet then I lose it - just like anyone else.

So, she posted a picture and said she felt happy with her body. And people told her she looked nice.

Did people comment that she specifically looked great now she was obese, or now that she has gained weight? I can see why you might have an issue with that.

But if it was just people saying she looked nice then you are completely over thinking this. If someone has felt insecure about something and is learning to accept it, you support them. It’s part of being a nice person.

OP YABU. Being overweight is a symptom of disordered eating and lack of self confidence and self love. No one gains weight because they think it is a positive thing. Your friend is much more likely to regain a healthy weight if she feels good about herself . There is barely a woman around who isn't aware of their size and they do not need an observer to point it out.

@SantaClaritaDiet

mintyfreshh

If someone unhealthily overweight has "confidence issue" surely it's a good thing! What do you want them to be, trying to be even bigger? FFS, the fake naivety is ridiculous.

It's not fake naivety. It's an acknowledgement that mental well-being is as important as, if not more important than, weight management.

I am overweight for so many reasons, chronic health conditions tipped me into obesity. I manage these conditions every day, and parents two kids, one of whom has SEN. I am a vegan and cut most fat out of my diet post-cholecystectomy. I haven't lost weight. So now I have to learn to love what I have because I cannot possibly do more.

You wouldn't know any of that from looking at me. You would just think 'That woman is obese'. Can you imagine how that feels from my POV?

@Totickleamockingbird

For people to help themselves, they have to believe they are worth saving For a large part of the obese and overweight part of the population, this is not true. Those extra 200 calories here and those two pints with your mate there is all that builds up over the years. There is one thread here celebrating wine’o clock every other day. There is nothing wrong with pointing out that an over-weight body is a clinical problem that needs solving or is in the process of being solved. Do we say to cancer patients who have lost all their hair: ‘you look gorgeous love!’ How insensitive that would be! OP is not saying obese people shouldn’t post pictures of their bodies and shouldn’t love it. OP is saying that a picture normalising or minimising obesity does not send the right message about you to the re of the world.

Erm I absolutely would say to a cancer patient who had lost all their hair that they looked great. Why is that insensitive? I guess you would comment something like, "god, you really don't suit bald do you?!" Since when is trying to build up a person's spirit a bad thing?

The OP is 100% saying that her 'friend' shouldn't be validated in loving her body.

Oh and here is an average week in case anyone thinks I'm just sat on my ass all day only going to the toilet and fridge.

[quote XingMing]@randomer, 20g of cheese is almost all fat and a satisfying tasty chunk of food as a between meal snack.[/quote]
Quality, not quantity. I learned that the hard way

OP lost loads of weight and is annoyed that someone else didn't and gets compliments for it.

Boo bloody hoo, OP.

I personally think body positivity is a good thing, and we should embrace the difference in people. But I have to admit I do agree with you.We should not be celebrating obesity. It is unhealthy and contributes to the ever-growing drain on the NHS.

@Coffeepot72

I’ve had an under active thyroid for over 20 years. People with this condition are given thyroid tablets, meaning you have just as much thyroxine in your body as the next person, just that it comes via tablets. So you then have no excuse for weight gain. If I eat too much I gain weight, but if I diet then I lose it - just like anyone else.

NHS needs to work seriously on weight-related disorders to create better awareness so people could differentiate between situations and understand the wealth of options available to them for tackling obesity in time. As previous posters have mentioned, it becomes a mental health issue and a vicious circle which is much harder to break later in life. By then, a lot of damage has occurred already. We also need a huge campaign on explaining food portion size to our children from an early age. Preferably from primary schools. Once ingrained, this can work wonders. But of course that is not the top of the list for BoJo, is it?

People are fat for many reasons. Our diets are getting worse we do very little ie sit at desks all day.

I was thin (no matter what I ate) now as my digestion gets progressively worse I eat less (as it’s uncomfortable) and I get fatter. To compensate I’m keeping myself as healthy as I can through exercise.

I couldn’t care two hoots about other people’s weight - I don’t celebrate or shame others, but it seems almost the norm that in the uk were getting very big.

Do people here egging OP on to go and tell the person that "she shouldn't love herself" etc realise they are pushing her to fat shame? Which is not what she did here?

Do you all realise YOU are actually making people upset because the only nasty on this thread come from you? Bloody hell Nasty pieces of work some of you are.

SantaClaritaDiet

If someone unhealthily overweight has "confidence issue" surely it's a good thing! What do you want them to be, trying to be even bigger? FFS, the fake naivety is ridiculous

Wanting to change something about yourself isn't the same as having confidence issues. Would you describe someone who would like to give up smoking for health reasons as 'having confidence issues'?

@SchrodingersImmigrant

Do people here egging OP on to go and tell the person that "she shouldn't love herself" etc realise they are pushing her to fat shame? Which is not what she did here?

Do you all realise YOU are actually making people upset because the only nasty on this thread come from you? Bloody hell Nasty pieces of work some of you are.

Because it's not at all 'nasty' to use this 'friend' and her post to start a thread to slag her off . That wouldn't be at all upsetting to her, if she found out (and it's amazing how people come to find out).

The other alternative to starting a shitty thread about her like this would be to have unfollowed or blocked her and moved on.

I and a family member got "thin shamed" by another family member when we almost conked out eating course no.6 of 7 in a restaurant recently. I'm not even that thin!! interesting debate op. others- do you not think non medical caused obesity isnt a problem in the UK?

It's not slagging her off. Only slagging and name calling, is coming from the other camp.

I am obese because I have a binge eating disorder that is triggered when my mental health is particularly bad. I suffer from anxiety and depression and have had multiple breakdowns that have seen me gain several stone.

Believe me I am seriously fucking ashamed of it. Every time I look in the mirror I see a horrific beast and it makes me want to cry, and I often do. And this just feeds my depression more and more and guess what? It causes me to binge eat and gain even more weight.

It is NOT as simple as thinking that shaming someone for being overweight is going to kickstart them into losing it and becoming a healthy weight. Very very often it has the complete opposite effect. The more self confidence I feel, the less I'm inclined to binge eat, the more I'm inclined to get out of the house and burn off a few calories, and the more weight I lose.

So please let's stop pretending that fatshaming is 'only out of concern.' And yes, that goes for other eating disorders and addictions too. People need support to get better - not shaming.

@JalapenoDave

I personally think body positivity is a good thing, and we should embrace the difference in people. But I have to admit I do agree with you.We should not be celebrating obesity. It is unhealthy and contributes to the ever-growing drain on the NHS.

That same NHS where some people have had simply no access to treatment for the past 6 months, and many have spent years being fobbed off and worse for what turned out to be treatable diseases, or some not so treatable .

Where, where did OP, or anyone else for that matter, suggest fat shaming?

I've lost 3 stone this year, I'm the lightest and skinniest I've ever been (BMI now in the middle of normal range) but my diet is the worst it's ever been and I'm definitely not healthy at all!

@SchrodingersImmigrant

It's not slagging her off. Only slagging and name calling, is coming from the other camp.

Right, starting a thread about her behind her back, so caring and friend like.

We all know being obese isn't healthy. But there ARE people who are obese and happy with their lives. If she is happy, why do you mind so much?

@SantaClaritaDiet

mintyfreshh

If someone unhealthily overweight has "confidence issue" surely it's a good thing! What do you want them to be, trying to be even bigger? FFS, the fake naivety is ridiculous.

The fake concern is even more ridiculous. You are clearly very ignorant if you believe overweight people having self confidence issues leads them to lose that weight. It is very often the complete opposite.