Neighbour asked me to be quiet

[DBML]

Good afternoon!

My husband and I work full time. My son is 15 and never plays loud games or music. We bought him earphones many years ago so as not to disturb us, let alone neighbours. We are a quiet family; no parties; no late TV; no pets; nothing.

Anyway, next door (SAHM) have a two and a half year old and I understand how difficult that is, but I am getting a little pissed off. We hear the baby crying, sometimes screaming with a little tantrum and ignore...all very normal, no harm done.

But, I put the vacuum on on a Saturday to Hoover around and I get a text asking me if I can turn it off as they are trying to put the baby down for a nap and he won’t go.

Today, I’ve just almost finished my big clean of the week (as I said, I work full time) the vacuum is on at 1.30pm for less than a minute when I get the text.

‘Hey hun - were trying to get ** off to sleep. Can you do the vacuuming some other time?’

I want to say ‘actually, no I can’t. I’m doing my housework now’.

Would I be unreasonable to just start the vacuum up now and finish the job?

I wouldn’t reply and claim to not have heard it

Definitely ignore. And block. No more avenues to make petty demands.

Send a message back that you can't do it another time, you work full time and you do you cleaning when you can. It's not like it's an unsociable hour. If you say you didn't see her message she'll continue asking in the future, better to just say no to her now,

Right, that’s it. That’s all it took! It’s not a big house and only a quick once over needed.

Singaporeslinky - my Apple Watch alerted me to the text, but you’re right, I might not have known about until too late anyway .

I’ve heard nothing else, so I’m going to assume we’re good.

Vacuuming at 6am I get is annoying and inconsiderate but 1.30pm their having a laugh

My neighbour has a piano which they’ve had for three years now, and they play the same song over, and over again. badly at 7 AM.

I just ignore them. Although I’ve thought of suggesting they buy a digital one, with headphones.

There are IMO times when neighbours need to be more considerate e.g. first thing in the morning and late evening and during the night. But asking neighbours to be quiet during the day is just ridiculous.

My neighbour on the other side said that the people on the other side of him complained when their dog barked. The dog would bark for maybe a couple of minutes if they went out and left her but that was all. But because of that he was paranoid that their crying baby would give them cause for complaint and asked me if it disturbed me.

The irony is that said complaining neighbours have now acquired a dog which barks extremely loudly and does so a lot. So loudly in fact that the first couple of times I heard it I thought it was my dog as this dog’s bark is similar to mine.

Bit late but I think your reply was spot on, no apology & polite but still got your point across.

So refreshing from the usual CF threads 😃

If you're not 'good' because you kept vacuuming, I'd write them off as idiots anyway.

Completely unreasonable request.

Next time he cries text "can you ask him to stop as I'm about to watch a film..."

We live in a ‘village’ location and it is a quiet place.

A few months ago I got told off by our other neighbour on the other side (so not the same one) for singing in the back garden. He came out and said ‘won’t you shut up’ lol!

I couldn’t blame him for that one though and he was smiling.

YANBU!!!!!!! Can't believe people like your neighbours actually exist, who do they think they are! On another note, how thin are the walls if they can hear you vacuuming? I've never heard my neighbours vacuum, in any house I've lived in!

Your neighbours are making a rod for their own backs. I hoovered, had the washing machine/tumble dryer on, radio playing, dogs barking etc when my two were young, they would sleep anywhere and now sleep like logs. I would tell her that and say you’ll continue your hoovering/housework and they can thank you in a few years time when the ‘baby’ sleeps through anything.

Tbh if the “baby” (who is 2 ) can’t get to sleep because of a Hoover going in the house next door it probably doesn’t really need a nap.

And generally YANBU as you shouldn’t have to stop doing day to day things because next door need total silence.

I wouldn't be putting up with piano playing every morning at 7am, I'd be looking up local noise restrictions. Although the look of me at that time in the morning the first time I went and knocked would scare the shit out of them 🤣
Three years? Why?

Bonkers. I’m sure I read a thread on here yesterday that said a new mum wanted perfect silence for the baby who woke at the slightest thing until she realised that he was worried he’d been left. She then carried on doing normal household stuff and the baby started sleeping better.

LOL - I used to do the vacuum when my toddlers napped - it sent them to sleep.

Cheeky fucker! I would definitely be saying, no I can’t do it at another time - the kid needs to learn to sleep through a bit of noise!

If they want dead silence during the day they need to go buy a house without any neighbours.

Can’t bear precious types like this

@DBML

Oh good. For a minute I braced myself for people telling me that I’m being unreasonable and that I should show a bit of consideration.

I’m getting the vacuum back out and I’m about to text:

‘Hi *, I’m afraid if I don’t get this housework done now, it’ll follow me around all weekend! Lol. I won’t be long xx’

But you don't even need to explain why you're doing it now or how long it'll take? it's none of their business quite frankly.

Wtf is this for real? If so, ignore and stop pandering to insane requests. Block their number FGS.

We always hoovered, mowed the lawn etc. with our babies so they slept through it. My friend had a neighbour who went nuts if anyone hoovered or worked in their garden in a half mile radius she actually knocked on doors. In the area to ask them to stop. Boy was she making a rod for her own back.

I have a really bad sleeper so I do sympathise with the neighbour, they are just asking. We do ask our neighbour but he has a circular saw in the garden which is right by DD’s window. Once mine is asleep then she’ll sleep through most noises, so if I was having a really bad day I might ask a neighbour to hold off for 15 mins if they could. I probably wouldn’t need to go hoovering and never have but Depends on the thinness of walls etc. Don’t think that’s mega entitled or anything, would just be asking if they didn’t mind. If they do then they’d just crack on anyway. Surprised people are being so cruel about the neighbour. After the first 10 months being sleep deprived torture and now at 19 months I’m still stressed and anxious at every nap and bedtime so can maybe empathise a bit more.

@Falcone

YANBU!!!!!!! Can't believe people like your neighbours actually exist, who do they think they are! On another note, how thin are the walls if they can hear you vacuuming? I've never heard my neighbours vacuum, in any house I've lived in!

It's not always about the thickness of walls but also chimneys. We have really thick walls and floors. Everything is insulated. However the chimneys "carry" noise.

Worked that out when I was a kid and when I was kicked out of the living room cos too young or whatever, I knew where to stand upstairs so I could listen lool.

Open plans iirc also have the same noise carrying situation.

@DBML

No, he’s a toddler, we all refer to him as the baby.

Is his name Neil?

@WTF99
Is his name Neil?